F68
Men who have emotional intelligence,
February 14 2013
Comments
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RHP User
13 years ago
Gentle, sensitive, firm, dominant please :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
I love and adore an Intelligent man!!! Even better if they show emotions....and can TALK! Puts foxy on heat.. :-) FOXY- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
Holy grail mythology
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Shinasbabe27'Holy grail mythology Shinas, thats rubbish. Babe, your punching below your weight lol. Freya I do relate to it. The thing is a lot of men see this as a weakness. They see men like this as insecure or afraid of being left and that they are doing more than necessary to keep their lady. Peer pressure from other men has a hugh effect on this. Secrets
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RHP User
13 years ago
Are you talking about my gay mates?Point me in the direction of intelligent men who are in tune with actual emotion, not false emotion that they 'think' they should show due to society/their friends telling them they should act a certain way.... or worse acting out what they think will get them into the sack...*sigh*Actually second thoughts - can you find me a sexy, tough looking trady with a few tatts, bit of stubble, a brain, ability to talk and not full of bs... just wrap him up, send him to Melbourne and pop a red bow on it so I know he's from you ;)Thanks OP *smirks*xoxo
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Shinasbabe27' Holy grail mythology Shina's what your thinking behind it being an urban myth?Cheers,W.
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RHP User
13 years ago
a soft sensual , caring lover can be just as much of a turn on....
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RHP User
13 years ago
look out...my secrets out. did the hankie in my pocket give me away?
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RHP User
13 years ago
An amazing, caring man. Made my choice and wouldn't swap him for anyone. 25 years and counting... Happy Valentines Day
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madotara69
13 years ago
Hello FreyaIn short , I could say with our relationship, I am the boss. As long as it's ok with Tara. he heFreya, in the past I have mentioned that I like to find and see the best in people. To be able to find this, means giving people the space to feel comfortable with expressing their beliefs. I feel that some people are confused with what they honestly believe, to what they feel they are supposed to believe.I believe there is a lot of forces around us where manipulation has been played upon peoples foundations to what they think is to be believed, therefore can make decisions based on something they guess is acceptable, in societies eyes.Considering myself as to being a caring, and gentle nature'd person, gives me the ability to listen and feel other people express their thoughts, and discuss that, rather than what I want them to think or feel. If pointing out what I see in others encourages confidence,pride and any other strengths, then to the best of, with my ability I will. Others may be disillusioned for what I believe is manipulated reason for thought, then I guess it may be considered dominant suggestion to express my thoughts for that, to another person. However I do not like the idea for telling anyone that they are right or wrong.Only that I believe in what they feel, or I don't. If I were askedAt times I feel that I may have cut off my nose to spite my face, for being part with other peoples decisions. But that is what I believe in, and I believe in them.I guess that is not such an intelligent practice.Thanks Freya, hope this relates to the question.
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RHP User
13 years ago
We totally exist! I'm cognisant of all my self-destructive tendencies!As for emotional maturity, however... Ummm... This conversation is getting a little too serious for my liking.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Just please don't cry, beg or tell me about your low self esteem. I find it a total turn off. It has to be the perfect mix of gentle, kind, sensitive and intelligent, confident, decisive. A real man with a good ear for (really) listening and an opinion to follow up with.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I've heard they exist , but Scottish locals will tell you that the loch mess monster is real as well but only a few have sighted this legend There in lies the answer to your question W . These fabled men exist but where ?
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RHP User
13 years ago
Not at all wussy Freya,in fact i think these are all genuine and nice qualities for a bloke to have and if a woman needs a little dominance in the bedroom, then if a man can provide that as well then all is good between them,jsk
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RHP User
13 years ago
Considering my subsequent singleness, thats a no brainer... due to contrary not-so-popular belief it isnt the meek that shall inherit the earth.. its the neanderthal that still have there knuckles dragging along the ground. YES they are making a comeback of proportionate measures. So alas gone are the days "apparently" for the need for caring, gentle, emotionally, intelligent men. Meekness was never a sign of weakness, until things like Wikipedia where people could go in change the meanings of words and then made it a reputable source of information. Possibly us men need a recipe or some measurements of how much of each we need to fulfill each different women, considering some women like more of the caring but less of the gentle. Or visa versa.. because my recipes must be way out of date. I cant seem to get my sophisticated soufflé to rise.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I'm greedy... I want it all! Gentle and kind but also confident, smart, authoritative, emotionally strong. There is a real strength in kindness and often men who are weak are the angry, nasty embittered ones. I love a strong masculine man, not sure if that means dominant. And Shineas, they do exist, they're just all still married dammit!
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RHP User
13 years ago
I greatly admire emotional intelligence in a person, especially a man. Now just to find me one ... KK xx
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RHP User
13 years ago
EQ isn't just "being gentle and kind", and doesn't preclude dominance... What trap is being laid? ;)- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
I can string a sentence together, and can quote Shakespeare at will with as much ease as I can discuss UFC methodologies or how to sort out the thermostat on a Datsun 120B (God, did I just say that?) It's about circumstance. Sometimes ladies want to take control, but a certain stunner I know wants to be dominated in the bedroom as she controls every other aspect of her life. It depends on you, the ladies, on how you want your man to be - but I suspect you'll be able to tell if a bloke markets himself as a SNAG but starts to act otherwise ;)
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RHP User
13 years ago
A display of intelligence and emotion doesn't necessarily make a man a squealing mincer, waiting for his hair product to finish warming up in the microwave (I assume this happens from the movies). There are few occasions indeed where brain and brawn cross the finish line together.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Awesome71' And Shineas, they do exist, they're just all still married dammit!
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RHP User
13 years ago
I think there's one floating around in this very forum ......
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RHP User
13 years ago
My opinion ,i tend to find , with age comes a mature attitude and understanding of emotions.When i was a young man i was not "in tune" with my feelings.As i age i think ,with a different attitude towards a number of feelings.
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RHP User
13 years ago
no trap,and of course emotional intelligence is not just about being gentle and kind nor does it preclude someone being a strong person but perhaps it does preclude someone having the NEED to dominate. Whether that is male or female.Many posters on the other thread I posted about dominance have indicated that for them it is either about giving another permission or accepting that permission is required for that to happen.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Masculinity + sensitivity. Soppy, passive, indecisive men are not for me, no matter how sensitive and caring they are.
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Cheekyarses
13 years ago
I was only thinking about this the other day. 'Oh where oh where, have the smart ppl gone' Please give me a man who is intelligent, caring, can hold a conversation n can be a master in the bedroom!! There is nothing appealing to me about a man who constantly talks about who he has done n how incredible he was!!! Don't tell me - show me!
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RHP User
13 years ago
They just haven't found me.. :-( They'll find you Shinas...I guarantee it!! and...he will be right for you. :-) FOXY PS- give me a man who can CRIES anyday.... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
Men who are submissive in their every day life do not turn me on at all. I want a caring considerate man who knows how to take the lead when required but is not overbearing or controlling. That is a turn on. Oh and they have to be very kinky bastards underneath.... That is super sexy. :)- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Vintagetatu'Are you talking about my gay mates? Point me in the direction of intelligent men who are in tune with actual emotion, not false emotion that they 'think' they should show due to society/their friends telling them they should act a certain way.... or worse acting out what they think will get them into the sack... *sigh* Actually second thoughts - can you find me a sexy, tough looking trady with a few tatts, bit of stubble, a brain, ability to talk and not full of bs... just wrap him up, send him to Melbourne and pop a red bow on it so I know he's from you ;) Thanks OP *smirks* xoxo box tickerer here. hahahahaha oh and as for you super fox, it might well interest you to know that sometimes i suffer bouts of over-exaggerated sense of sentimentality. just the other day in fact watching home alone and poor kevin touching reunion with his mother. oh the tears were flowing.
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RHP User
13 years ago
It's a shame that you have let one prick change your life and outlook. Time to let go I reckon. ❤- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
all parked in the "just good friends" lane for a future "relationship"Whilst the men you fuck now are the muscle and tatts bad boys.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I know a few males that are like this but don't be fooled by them thinking they are soft and weak because they are some of the hardest and toughest blokes i know. I personally find that the men that have to act tough and that are the weak ones.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Freya13' no trap,and of course emotional intelligence is not just about being gentle and kind nor does it preclude someone being a strong person but perhaps it does preclude someone having the NEED to dominate. Whether that is male or female.Many posters on the other thread I posted about dominance have indicated that for them it is either about giving another permission or accepting that permission is required for that to happen. I know no-one likes a definitional argument... but I'm a pedant - one of my many character flaws.According to that beyond-repute source of information (wikipedia ;))..."Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to identify, assess, and control the emotions of oneself, of others, and of groups. It can be divided into ability EI and trait EI. Ability EI is usually measured using maximum performance tests and has stronger relationships with traditional intelligence, whereas trait EI is usually measured using self-report questionnaires and has stronger relationships with personality.Criticisms have centered on whether EI is a real intelligence and whether it has incremental validity over IQ and the Big Five personality traits."EI or EQ are really useful skills/traits for understanding individuals and groups, but can be a double edged sword if you're always worried about how everyone else is feeling.However, I suspect, what you're talking about is someone who is in touch with their emotions. I don't know if that has a neat label? Maybe it's SNAG...As for the trap comment... ignore that. Not even sure myself what I meant...
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RHP User
13 years ago
...that IQ and EI (or EMI depending in the model) are totally independent of each other. Some folks can be very intelligent and have the maturity of boxed wine...others that are well balanced emotionally may be of average intelligence yet others may consider them to be sensitive and emotionally available...or if they're really there, playful and happy to bring the inner-child out for a good romp in the playground every now and then. EI is a very inexact science...there's a huge difference between the commercial models and the more academic, let alone how that individual may uniquely relate to you. Long paragraph really saying...I haven't got a clue.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Shinasbabe27' I've heard they exist , but Scottish locals will tell you that the loch mess monster is real as well but only a few have sighted this legend There in lies the answer to your question W . These fabled men exist but where ? I will put it out there that a lot of them with EI are married or are in relationships already. I think its just a matter of being patient and keep focused on what you are after in a guy though will be a lot of needle in a hay stack stuff but they are there.BTW I agree with what Meeks said about letting go and being open to the future and not stuck in the past
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Freya13' no trap,and of course emotional intelligence is not just about being gentle and kind nor does it preclude someone being a strong person but perhaps it does preclude someone having the NEED to dominate. Whether that is male or female.Many posters on the other thread I posted about dominance have indicated that for them it is either about giving another permission or accepting that permission is required for that to happen. I would say your spot on Freya that it definitely removes the need. Having the EI to understand in most situations there are more than one way to get the desired outcome. If you need to take charge your not timid yet assertive and in control of your own emotions and actions.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'DontLookDown'Long paragraph really saying...I haven't got a clue. Who does eh??Buuuuuuut no of that talks to the idea that blokes should become blubbers ;)An aside, I *hate* the way public figures have latched onto showing emotions in public as some kind of get-out-of-jail-free card. Emotions are good. False emotions are pants.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Awesome71'I'm greedy... I want it all! Gentle and kind but also confident, smart, authoritative, emotionally strong. There is a real strength in kindness and often men who are weak are the angry, nasty embittered ones. I love a strong masculine man, not sure if that means dominant. And Shineas, they do exist, they're just all still married dammit! and some of us, because of these traits are allowed to play openly
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RHP User
13 years ago
I'm 48 It's been many pricks my friend....:) I'm a prick magnet !!!
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RHP User
13 years ago
I'm 48 It's been many pricks my friend....:) I'm a prick magnet !!!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Dominant personality traits..... are not mutually exclusive to being caring, nurturing and empathic. I'd agree, and go further - without nurturing, caring, empathy, then dominance can quickly run into domineering.IMHO.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Many see EI as a personality jigsaw referring to the capacity to perceive emotions, assimilate emotion-related feelings, understand the information of those emotions, and manage them.If you read Daniel Goleman dominance does not really come into it.I would say that someone with a high EQ is very much in touch with themselves and their emotions. Would definitely say they are not wussy or needy but are very capable of standing on their own two feet emotionally.They will laugh and cry with you.If you can find one ladies hang on to him.
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RHP User
13 years ago
My understanding is that EI is about knowing what someone likes and dislike, not necessary how you act towards someone. I would like to think if anyone is a decent caring person they would respect someone's likes and dislikes and act accordingly. OMG i am being too serious, i joint to have fun. Sorry. Any ladies want a sensual massage.- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
It is a complex issue but when I am dating a georgeous woman that is a bit alloof and , well the way a lot of georgeous ones are I tend to be a bit sucky for want of a better word and not dominant but if i date a more down to earth one that is more user friendly then the dominance comes out as well as the relaxed tender but firm , exciting funloving nature comes out so I would have to say that it would depend on the woman and i f a woman thinks a man is being a but too "sucky" then it may be because he is not at ease with the woman.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Araps' Quoting 'Shinasbabe27' Holy grail mythology Shina's what your thinking behind it being an urban myth? Cheers, W. Quoting 'Vintagetatu'Are you talking about my gay mates? Point me in the direction of intelligent men who are in tune with actual emotion, not false emotion that they 'think' they should show due to society/their friends telling them they should act a certain way.... or worse acting out what they think will get them into the sack... *sigh* Actually second thoughts - can you find me a sexy, tough looking trady with a few tatts, bit of stubble, a brain, ability to talk and not full of bs... just wrap him up, send him to Melbourne and pop a red bow on it so I know he's from you ;) Thanks OP *smirks* xoxo watch it I resemble that coment the trady bit lol you women have such high standards...... i mean to say you want us to be able to talk to you as if you are just a person, think and be able to have a oppinion of our own other than grading the boobs as they pass........ what next know how to move inside you mind as much as your body ???????? you might be super women but superman im not :-)
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RHP User
13 years ago
We're out there, confident yet sensitive, considerate and decisive, masculine and caring, and some are even single, holding out for the right one still...Look for the men that travel the world on dirt bikes... ;)
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RHP User
13 years ago
This does not have to be an either/or scenario. The best men are strong enough in character to be caring and gentle. Those with a chip on their shoulder or insecurity about their own masculinity tend to be the ones who won't allow themselves to be 'soft'. MsK x
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'holdenf' I personally find that the men that have to act tough and that are the weak ones. How true! Gentle and caring men are awesome. That does not mean they cannot be dominant at the same time.
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BrisMike
13 years ago
I'm sure someone has said something similar but the truth of the matter is that women say they want a sensitive guy who will care about them and be able to hold a conversation with them and not just be after one thing but those exact same girls keep going for guys who treat them badly and are, to put it bluntly, just assholes. Why? Because they don't want a guy who is already nice, they want a guy they can try and change to be nice. Change to be the guy they want rather than actually go for the guy who is already like that.For many years i was that nice guy, that guy you could talk to and cared about you, the guy who was sensitive and had emotions and all i ever got was "i just want to be friends with you" or "you're not my type" or the worst one of all, "why can't i find a guy like you?" Easiest example is one of my close friends, for years i have been in love with her and every time i say something about me and her being together or something similar, she passes it off like i'm joking and says to me "but you're just my friend" and yet when you ask her what she wants in a guy she describes me, my personality, my beliefs, my feelings, my thoughts, everything. So girls, do us guys a favour. Actually say what you want, don't beat around the bush, don't hint and don't say what you don't mean. Believe it or not, guys actually love a girl who can be straight forward. The whole "maybe i like you maybe i don't" things isn't as cute as you may think. Yeah its fun at first, but most girls do it for way too long and we lose interest. So if you want a nice guy, go for a nice guy. Don't try to change a bad boy cause the chance of you being in a loving relationship where he'll be what you want him to become is pretty damn slim.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'massagemeperth'My understanding is that EI is about knowing what someone likes and dislike, not necessary how you act towards someone. I would like to think if anyone is a decent caring person they would respect someone's likes and dislikes and act accordingly. OMG i am being too serious, i joint to have fun. Sorry. Any ladies want a sensual massage.What I wouldnt do for a sensual massage !!!! So girls, do us guys a favour. Actually say what you want, don't beat around the bush, don't hint and don't say what you don't mean its simple..a decent guy..........there you go .....simple !!!
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RHP User
13 years ago
ask this stuff to other guys ?? I dont know one single bloke who has said anything like that to me ever. We dod this shit in the privacy of our own lifes BUT NEVER Tell another person about it
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting '7andahalf4u'I'm sure someone has said something similar but the truth of the matter is that women say they want a sensitive guy who will care about them and be able to hold a conversation with them and not just be after one thing but those exact same girls keep going for guys who treat them badly and are, to put it bluntly, just assholes. Why? Because they don't want a guy who is already nice, they want a guy they can try and change to be nice. What I want: For someone who says he'll tell us all the "blatant truth" to follow it up with something that is at least a little bit correct. I call bullshit. With all due respect, of course.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad'Dominant personality traits..... are not mutually exclusive to being caring, nurturing and empathic. DGAbsolutely :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting '7andahalf4u' Easiest example is one of my close friends, for years i have been in love with her and every time i say something about me and her being together or something similar, she passes it off like i'm joking and says to me "but you're just my friend" and yet when you ask her what she wants in a guy she describes me, my personality, my beliefs, my feelings, my thoughts, everything. This doesn't mean she's not into caring, sensitive guys. It means she's not into you :( Attraction needs chemistry as well as a tick list of personality and physical characteristics. I'm guessing the chemistry just isn't there for her.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting '7andahalf4u' I'm sure someone has said something similar but the truth of the matter is that women say they want a sensitive guy who will care about them and be able to hold a conversation with them and not just be after one thing but those exact same girls keep going for guys who treat them badly and are, to put it bluntly, just assholes. Why? Because they don't want a guy who is already nice, they want a guy they can try and change to be nice. Change to be the guy they want rather than actually go for the guy who is already like that.For many years i was that nice guy, that guy you could talk to and cared about you, the guy who was sensitive and had emotions and all i ever got was "i just want to be friends with you" or "you're not my type" or the worst one of all, "why can't i find a guy like you?" Easiest example is one of my close friends, for years i have been in love with her and every time i say something about me and her being together or something similar, she passes it off like i'm joking and says to me "but you're just my friend" and yet when you ask her what she wants in a guy she describes me, my personality, my beliefs, my feelings, my thoughts, everything. So girls, do us guys a favour. Actually say what you want, don't beat around the bush, don't hint and don't say what you don't mean. Believe it or not, guys actually love a girl who can be straight forward. The whole "maybe i like you maybe i don't" things isn't as cute as you may think. Yeah its fun at first, but most girls do it for way too long and we lose interest. So if you want a nice guy, go for a nice guy. Don't try to change a bad boy cause the chance of you being in a loving relationship where he'll be what you want him to become is pretty damn slim. Here we have a classic sufferer, who doesn't realise that when a guy is being 'nice' to women simply to try and get in their pants / start a relationship with them, that means he is not being truthful about his real motives which actually isn't very nice at all.Just because you're 'nice' to a woman, and YOU think you're everything she wants in a man, doesn't make it so. It doesn't mean she has to sleep with you, or go out with you, or reciprocate your feelings. If you feel that she 'owes' you something, that clearly indicates not only a problematic attitude towards women in general, but also that you don't actually care much at all about her and are mainly concerned with your own feelings. And that's not nice either.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Fortunately for me emotional inteligence does not mean NOT being dominant. If a man is not dominant, is so gentle and caring that I can walk all over him...guess what? I am gonna do just that...and lose all respect for him in the process. IMO emotional intelligence does not equal soft. Being gentle and being caring are qualities much admired in a man. He can also be strong, in charge, in control of the situation (most of the time) as well. It is like everything else....balance. I certainly do not want a man who defers to me all the time. That pisses me off no end. There are times when I want a man to take charge. There are times when I want him to be a little rough that certainly does not equate to emotional UNintelligence. I also do not like soppy passive men. My own personality is way too strong for that.
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RHP User
13 years ago
me lil_bit- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
13 years ago
A few days long if I recall.After the last day she came past on her way home and told me I ticked all the emotional intelligence boxes. She just thought she'd drop in and let me know.I think a few women here would argue with her though.And yes, my mates and I do sometimes discuss this sort of thing. One of them is the first bloke in Australia to do his PHD on what it is to be a man (still under peer review). We've had a number of discussions about the nature of masculinity.You just need very good single malt and black chocolate if you want to discuss it. Maybe even a pipe.
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RHP User
13 years ago
The old nice guys versus jerks thing. It's tired. Tell me, you sit and listen to her problems. You do whatever she asks of you. You're "caring" and "sensitive". And then you're royally pissed off when she goes and finds some other "jerk" rather than flocking to you. Why?Because you're not being a nice guy at all if you're just doing all of those things to get into her pants. What, you think women don't pick up on that? Sure, women have been known to use guys, but let's not pretend that you - as the "nice guy" had any other motive except to hit a home run. And you did all those nice guy things in the most passive and secretive way you could manage with an ulterior motive hidden up your sleeve.That "jerk"...well he's really just someone who had the balls to step up, say what he meant, do what he wanted to do, and not sit around like a lapdog waiting for the girl to bark her next order. He opened and closed the deal, whatever his shortcomings. Jerk? He's far nicer than you. Why? Because he's far more honest than you.
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BrisMike
13 years ago
Glad to know that when someone voices their opinion that people feel the need to reply with hatred and disrespect towards them.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Yup....agree. A man that is a man backs up his words with the actions that show it :)
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madotara69
13 years ago
Quoting 'Ghostbusters' Yup....agree. A man that is a man backs up his words with the actions that show it :) Thats about the truth of it all, in a nut shell... guess that man would known as the gentleman
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madotara69
13 years ago
When you get what you want in your struggle for self, and the world makes you king for a dayThen go to the mirror, and see what the man has to sayFor it isn't your Father, Mother or Wife, who's judgement upon you must passThe fellows verdict counts most in your life, is the one staring back from the glassSome people may think your a straight shooting chum, and call you a wonderful guyBut the man in the mirror says your a bum, if you can't look him straight in the eyesHe's the fellow to please, never mind all the rest, for he's clear with you to the endAnd you have passed your most difficult and dangerous test, if the man in the glass is your friendYou may fool the whole world, down the pathways of years, and pats on the back as you passYour final reward will be heartache and tears, if you have cheated the man in the glassI think this relates to your Question Freya. xx
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RHP User
13 years ago
Caring is far from wussy! it is naturally apart of everyone , but a man must be a man wen it counts - crunch time ...Speak in role play experiment in fantasy
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RHP User
13 years ago
All I'm after if emotional maturity? Emotional intelligence - Makes no sense?
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RHP User
13 years ago
absolutely
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RHP User
13 years ago
Hello :) Excuse me for butting in, I think you should tell your friend you have serious feelings for her and you want more than friendship. If she says no, that she only sees you as a friend. Then fine. You can be friends but stop seeing her, stop being there for her all the time. Make yourself unavailable. Go out and meet some other girls and have fun dude. Seriously!!! Now I know this probably will not be a popular statement but I think women, okay I, like a challenge. Men that are too easy, too nice, too eager to please are... They are.... Actually they are not exciting, mysterious, or alluring. I am not saying that men should play mind games... But when someone is too eager to please. I don't know, it's a turn off. That is probably just me though.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I don't think MsD or DG were saying that at all. But then again your view of what a man should be and mine are different.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I want a man to be a man. I dont need a pussy I already have one. . . What makes people think that men dont have emotions? That they dont care? Of course they do. It is just shown in different ways that a woman would show it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
but someone said something about women going for 'bad guys'... it comes down to attraction. There is a possibility a bad guy can change his attitude, but it's pretty hard to turn a 'nice guy' who you are not attracted to, into someone you do have a physical attraction to. It's a bit rough to say "I'm yours if you go under the knife and get your face done." Nighty night.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Vintagetatu'Are you talking about my gay mates? Point me in the direction of intelligent men who are in tune with actual emotion, not false emotion that they 'think' they should show due to society/their friends telling them they should act a certain way.... or worse acting out what they think will get them into the sack... *sigh* Actually second thoughts - can you find me a sexy, tough looking trady with a few tatts, bit of stubble, a brain, ability to talk and not full of bs... just wrap him up, send him to Melbourne and pop a red bow on it so I know he's from you ;) Thanks OP *smirks* xoxo Ah dear, would you like a lend of mine? lol check our profile.... You can have him but I keep the red ribbon Mrs Sweaty
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Popular or not..... its the way of the female of the human species. Ms Shout loves David Attenborough too. Mr Tryst
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Quoting 'Meeka100' Now I know this probably will not be a popular statement but I think women, okay I, like a challenge. Men that are too easy, too nice, too eager to please are... They are.... Actually they are not exciting, mysterious, or alluring. I am not saying that men should play mind games... But when someone is too eager to please. I don't know, it's a turn off. That is probably just me though. Popular or not..... its the way of the female of the human species.If a man is too eager, too available, too...... clingy.... it infers to her that his own life must not be very important, must not very active or interesting enough that he should have to make her life... his entire life.Oh, sure we all like to contemplate the romanticised version where man meets woman... and he HAS to make her part of his life. And thats lovelyBut thats just it. Part of it.So we can argue in circles about nice guys v bad boys...... and contemplate how it should be...... or... we can accept how it IS... and work with it to make our own human communications more effective and beneficial.DGOh god no I couldn't have anyone like that. I like my space and independence and I suppose I expect any partner I have to be the same. Although I don't think I was thinking of it in such extremes DG, you have probably gone a little too far with your description. As you may have become aware, I am a strong personality I think. I need someone who I can't walk all over, because I wouldn't respect that and I want a man to challenge me, physically and mentally, to be someone I can look up to. The men I go for are nice guys, they are caring and sensitive and emotionally intelligent but they are strong with in themselves and we are equals. And I like them to be dominant... but I am absolutely no walk over myself mind. Does that make sense?
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RHP User
13 years ago
Oh god no I couldn't have anyone like that. I like my space and independence and I suppose I expect any partner I have to be the same. Although I don't think I was thinking of it in such extremes DG, you have probably gone a little too far with your description. As you may have become aware, I am a strong personality I think. I need someone who I can't walk all over, because I wouldn't respect that and I want a man to challenge me, physically and mentally, to be someone I can look up to. The men I go for are nice guys, they are caring and sensitive and emotionally intelligent but they are strong with in themselves and we are equals. And I like them to be dominant... but I am absolutely no walk over myself mind. Does that make sense?
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'LittleRedEngine'And yes, my mates and I do sometimes discuss this sort of thing. One of them is the first bloke in Australia to do his PHD on what it is to be a man (still under peer review). We've had a number of discussions about the nature of masculinity.You just need very good single malt and black chocolate if you want to discuss it. Maybe even a pipe.You've just described three of my favourite things: pipes (I'm not a cop!), single malts, and deconstructions of gender. I'm in!
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RHP User
13 years ago
here is a like button....twice
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RHP User
13 years ago
Can i order one of those please? :-)
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Shinasbabe27'Holy grail mythology I shall just have to tell that hottie that just got out of my sheets your a unicorn same as the one due today i must have found a field of unicorns in Perth :) there are some men I have met on here, and that by the way I have not slept with that are exactly that smart and sexy LRE, Cavey, neptune drift, Jensman, and lets not forget Coodieyowie just to name a few and a lot are on the forums as well, that I have never met and they sound pretty smart to me but then I am blonde, anyone looks smart to me especially if they are smart enough to make it to my bed
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'tuscanred' Quoting 'Shinasbabe27'Holy grail mythology I shall just have to tell that hottie that just got out of my sheets your a unicorn same as the one due today i must have found a field of unicorns in Perth :) I thought you were giving it all away ???????????????? The Ones that have EI.....yeah they are unicorns...especially in Perth !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'blond_gypsy'The old nice guys versus jerks thing. It's tired. Tell me, you sit and listen to her problems. You do whatever she asks of you. You're "caring" and "sensitive". And then you're royally pissed off when she goes and finds some other "jerk" rather than flocking to you. Why? Because you're not being a nice guy at all if you're just doing all of those things to get into her pants. What, you think women don't pick up on that? Sure, women have been known to use guys, but let's not pretend that you - as the "nice guy" had any other motive except to hit a home run. And you did all those nice guy things in the most passive and secretive way you could manage with an ulterior motive hidden up your sleeve. That "jerk"...well he's really just someone who had the balls to step up, say what he meant, do what he wanted to do, and not sit around like a lapdog waiting for the girl to bark her next order. He opened and closed the deal, whatever his shortcomings. Jerk? He's far nicer than you. Why? Because he's far more honest than you. just to get into her pants. they may think about it, but they have the smarts to know there is no chemistry so they do not plan or plot to get their way into said panties that is the intelligent part. I like assertive smart men that have these qualities. There are a lot on here, more than people realise but us women have the chance to meet a lot , if we choose. Many women are stuck in the past, and are blind to the nice guys that are offering a potential relationship but alas like one poster put here they are not the fit tatt buff boys those boys are good for married women like me, as they are just like me after the sex only. if they want a relationship they are in a different hunting ground. they are not Jerks, they are men with their own needs. they are easy to read, if women open their eyes. I think all men have emotional intelligence, they are just not so verbal about it as women are. They may not show it on here, but they do to their wives, their sisters, their mothers and their female friends. On rhp its the land of the hard cocks, so that sticks out first and the rest, you have to get to know them a little first.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Shinasbabe27' Quoting 'tuscanred' Quoting 'Shinasbabe27'Holy grail mythology I shall just have to tell that hottie that just got out of my sheets your a unicorn same as the one due today i must have found a field of unicorns in Perth :) I thought you were giving it all away ???????????????? The Ones that have EI.....yeah they are unicorns...especially in Perth !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lets just say, I have my fwb offline now, and yes I can resist anything but temptation lol but no more new lovers.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Give us single SOR gals a chance
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Popular or not..... its the way of the female of the human species. If a man is too eager, too available, too...... clingy.... it infers to her that his own life must not be very important, must not very active or interesting enough that he should have to make her life... his entire life. Oh, sure we all like to contemplate the romanticised version where man meets woman... and he HAS to make her part of his life. And thats lovely DG Quoting 'tryst_and_shout' Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Popular or not..... its the way of the female of the human species. Ms Shout loves David Attenborough too. Mr Tryst In my head I just read DG's entire post in David Attenborough's voice. Just brilliant. It all makes sense now!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Shinasbabe27' Give us single SOR gals a chance You have your own patch of man territory at the nudie beach and must be about time we had a coffee again, and get have a photo shoot, I am doing some from home, but only couples. have to wait for my studio to be built before I get back to my normal workload. thats why I am taking it easy for a while, moving house soon. Just around the corner so still on da beach. will rent this house out, fully self contained cause i hate moving stuff!
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RHP User
13 years ago
I think we have so much wrong in our belief how men should be, the pressure on men is so big. I think sometimes women forget what a man is all about. Shouldn’t we be like yang and ying, compliment each other instead of fight each other? Aren’t the differences between us what drive us to be together, what gives us the edge to be sexually attracted? Maybe I miss the point here, but I have not come across many mean men. Could be I am blind to them, could be I am not attracting the mean once into my life. Who knows? I like a man who can cry, my late husband cried as our children where born, he cried because I was in pain. Was he in my eyes weak, lol no he was caring, beautiful and manly. My sons cry and need a good talk when unhappily in love or some other things are heavy on their heart. Are they weak? I don’t believe so. Both are true males, males in showing emotions, males who can talk to women but also males who embrace their maleness and are proud to be male. When I look around what we want from men I have the view we are putting them in a box and punishing them for……what??? Or unhappiness……and most of all we don’t even know why we unhappy. Fuck I am getting of track. Ok I stop Hey all you men out there be a male in your own way, what ever this means for you.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I was brought up with three sisters in a very quiet, small town. I was raised on the principles of considering others and communicating on an emotional level. If I ask you how your day was, I don't actually want to know what you did. I want to know how it made you feel. I feel everything, we all do. A slow burn is wonderful .... I also sense your passion, and if i see it in your eyes, i will through you up against a wall as soon as you walk throught the door and give you what you long for... There is comfort in both.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'tuscanred' just to get into her pants. they may think about it, but they have the smarts to know there is no chemistry so they do not plan or plot to get their way into said panties that is the intelligent part. I like assertive smart men that have these qualities. There are a lot on here, more than people realise but us women have the chance to meet a lot , if we choose. Many women are stuck in the past, and are blind to the nice guys that are offering a potential relationship but alas like one poster put here they are not the fit tatt buff boys those boys are good for married women like me, as they are just like me after the sex only. if they want a relationship they are in a different hunting ground. they are not Jerks, they are men with their own needs. they are easy to read, if women open their eyes. I think all men have emotional intelligence, they are just not so verbal about it as women are. They may not show it on here, but they do to their wives, their sisters, their mothers and their female friends. On rhp its the land of the hard cocks, so that sticks out first and the rest, you have to get to know them a little first. I think it's intuition that teaches us the difference between a "nice guy" (read: whimpering coward with hidden motives) and a truly nice guy, who is genuine and has genuine intentions. Sure, men can be nice to women with no agenda. That is actually nice, compared to the ones who don the caring personality attributes like a cloak.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I think your theory may have a fatal flaw Mr Attenborough. You see, what may appear as clingy and too eager to please to you and I, will not appears this way to all of the female species. We are all different after all, and to some women these qualities will appear manly and kind and romantic. There is a potential mate for everyone... therefore a male trying adapt his behaviour to catch himself a female doesn't usually work to the satisfaction of all parties. Yet, I feel this is where you are headed with your observations.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Was emotion intelligent??? Emotion is the most irrational form of human behaviour. There is no logic to it, there is just manipulation. Some people use it for genuine intentions, others not so...
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RHP User
13 years ago
Well GB, some people do manipulate people and their emotions. But emotions is what has kept us all alive all these years. Love, fear, bonds between humans and animals. As you are aware I am a very emotional person, I am passionate and yes, that sometimes is difficult and I most likely do act irrationally at times. But I wouldn't have it any other way. M
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RHP User
13 years ago
I mean the humans as a species that is. In order to grow & develop we have needed emotions in order to survive.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Power? Now that is such a man word. From knowledge comes understanding.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'How_Far' I was brought up with three sisters in a very quiet, small town. I was raised on the principles of considering others and communicating on an emotional level. If I ask you how your day was, I don't actually want to know what you did. I want to know how it made you feel. I feel everything, we all do. A slow burn is wonderful .... I also sense your passion, and if i see it in your eyes, i will through you up against a wall as soon as you walk throught the door and give you what you long for... There is comfort in both. I ask you to bite ... will you?
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RHP User
13 years ago
I'm moving to WA.
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RHP User
13 years ago
You would not have to ask twice...
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'How_Far' I was brought up with three sisters in a very quiet, small town. I was raised on the principles of considering others and communicating on an emotional level. If I ask you how your day was, I don't actually want to know what you did. I want to know how it made you feel. I feel everything, we all do. A slow burn is wonderful .... I also sense your passion, and if i see it in your eyes, i will through you up against a wall as soon as you walk throught the door and give you what you long for... There is comfort in both.Is it possible that a man such as yourself is actually single. What a great balance of all the qualities I like. What a turn on Quoting 'How_Far' I was brought up with three sisters in a very quiet, small town. I was raised on the principles of considering others and communicating on an emotional level. If I ask you how your day was, I don't actually want to know what you did. I want to know how it made you feel. I feel everything, we all do. A slow burn is wonderful .... I also sense your passion, and if i see it in your eyes, i will through you up against a wall as soon as you walk throught the door and give you what you long for... There is comfort in both.
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RHP User
13 years ago
for the ice on a hot balmy night .....
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RHP User
13 years ago
Interesting thread, and it annoyed me enough to re-join this site(for a little while at least) when I had just about decided it was a waste of time.EQ- is all about knowing what to do with the information that your sense apparatus presents to you. It is a trainable skill.It is worth training in as it makes our life better, and makes us easier to get on with. The most effective methods of training all involve some form of mindfulness training and relaxation training.EQ and sensitivity are not the same thing- and if truly insensitive- there is likely a problem. EQ, though, is trainable- and in this context, one of the signs of EQ is knowing when a woman likes to "play submissive" in sex. I would suggest that knowing that is probably a "master class" topic when it comes to EQ.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'ChiefGazza' Considering my subsequent singleness, thats a no brainer... due to contrary not-so-popular belief it isnt the meek that shall inherit the earth.. its the neanderthal that still have there knuckles dragging along the ground. YES they are making a comeback of proportionate measures. So alas gone are the days "apparently" for the need for caring, gentle, emotionally, intelligent men. Meekness was never a sign of weakness, until things like Wikipedia where people could go in change the meanings of words and then made it a reputable source of information. Possibly us men need a recipe or some measurements of how much of each we need to fulfill each different women, considering some women like more of the caring but less of the gentle. Or visa versa.. because my recipes must be way out of date. I cant seem to get my sophisticated soufflé to rise. Ohhhh poor Gazza!We still like men that are caring & gentle & emotionally intelligent.... Confident without being brash or arrogant is also good! A little sophistication is also called for...If you can't get your souffle' to rise then you can always take us out to dinner?
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RHP User
13 years ago
Was brought up as an old fashioned guy. My dad taught me to treat laddies with respect, never harm them, Proper manners like opening up door and pulling out chairs for them. Some guys think i'm too caring and nice. Some laddies think i'm too nice and i'm a soft. I can be dominate if the occasion arise ;). What do you laddies think?
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