F54
whats a player???
February 07 2011
Comments
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RHP User
15 years ago
Depends on the context. Can be someone who plays the field, or one of the "in" crow....there's a few ways to use the term.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Good question and hard to answer! My idea of a player is someone that lies to you and isn't straight up about what they want. Even after you tell them that you just want something sexual and nothing more....they feel they still need to feed you bullshit to get into your pants! xFunlovingx
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RHP User
15 years ago
yes, agree with funloving - someone that simply tries to manipulate you with lies with no good reason... and there would be deranged people like that, I've met them... SAD!
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RHP User
15 years ago
Many types of Players! A man! Who is having sex with a few Woman! But they all think their Exclusive! or Visa! Versa!
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RHP User
15 years ago
I think a player is someone who woos women - wines and dines them and makes them feel special but has no interest in every getting serious even though they give that impression.Also could have a few women on the go at any one time.xxMeeks
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RHP User
15 years ago
I always understood the term "Player" to refer to someone who is literally playing the field...looking for sex with women without commitment, but willing to do whatever it takes to "score". See the sporting references abound? A player is someone who is smoothtalking, not to be taken at face value, but who is also successful. Right? Otherise, they are simply a "wannabe." Peace out :)
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RHP User
15 years ago
Could be someone that has a bit of an excessive "rabbit habit" or is a "bed hooperoo". I think of a player more as someone that needs a scorecard to keep track of whose playing on the field and on what day...maybe even plays a couple of rounds in the morning with one person and set or two with someone else in the evening, Only hooks up with people named Harry or Sally so you don't call out the wrong name in the middle of the game.| Basically just doesn't give a damn as long as it can fog a mirror and you can rationlize it as all in good fun. Can be male or female...the shirts come in all sizes. Oh well...self respect and respect for you usually balance out on the fulcrum at a dead even zero. Really, just an in the flesh biomass and organic substitute for masturbation... | ...except when you do that, the conversation is usually a bit better.
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RHP User
15 years ago
A player is someone who'll lead you on promising the world to get what he/she wants with no intention of ever being serious. Your feelings don't get taken into account. Players play (as MrsPeachpear said) and they lie (as FunLoving said). It's all about the chase and the conquest for a player. WP
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RHP User
15 years ago
I always thought the term “Player” referred to a guy who liked to “play the field”... A few weeks ago had drinks with a group friends and the topic of "players" came up. In conclusion the women agreed that most "player" talks a good game but don’t follow through. (purely because they don’t hang around long enough to perfect the finer skills)
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RHP User
15 years ago
A player is a person who strings someone along for their own benefit. Women do it all the time... they surround themselves with guys that make them feel sexy... or someone they find entertaining.... stringing them along by the heart strings....flirting to keep them interested..... PLAYING WITH THEIR EMOTIONS .... until they find the dude they're really looking for... or perhaps until someone funner comes along to substitute.... Often more than one guy at a time.... deep down you know you do it. Men do it too.HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
Does it have to be a negative thing? I don't really consider it to be about stringing anyone along or deceiving them, to me the most important and attractive thing about playing with a player is that they know how to play just for the fun of it and they aren't going to get attached. . I like to think of this entire lifestyle as a game to be played and enjoyed, it's way more fun when everyone knows the rules. :)
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RHP User
15 years ago
Players are paying thier own game. They will have multiple partners without the emotional attachment. Sex is just that....sex. Fun and games. Now I know that can discribe 95% of us on this site but a player will have that extra edge. It doesnt mean that they do not get emotionally attached to thier playmates at all because some of them may turn into really good friends. A player will keep thier playmates on a string without even seeming to do so. Keep them in the background until they are ready, but at the same time manage to keep them happy and friendly. They will tell you up front that they dont want a relationship. They will be honest about that and thier intentions but then they will treat you with such high regard, take note of all the special little things you like and make you feel like there could possibly be something more and then act all surprized when you actually want more. Playing the game is actually an art form when done right and I have watched one in action from the sidelines.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'curiousnewgirl78' Does it have to be a negative thing? I don't really consider it to be about stringing anyone along or deceiving them, to me the most important and attractive thing about playing with a player is that they know how to play just for the fun of it and they aren't going to get attached. . I like to think of this entire lifestyle as a game to be played and enjoyed, it's way more fun when everyone knows the rules. :) im not saying being a player is a negitive thing...but if everyone else is right and its a person playing with your emotions then thats not a very nice thing to be doing i get that all of us on here are players to some extent...but some of us are honest and mean what we say and if that means someone wont sleep with us because of it, then so be it...id never lie to a man to get him into bed i think thats unfair on the bloke and i figger it wont get me far anyway lol but iv had plenty of men lie to me to get me into bed and the funny thing is, if they had of told me the truth i would have slept with them anyway hahaha roxxy
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'curiousnewgirl78' Does it have to be a negative thing? I don't really consider it to be about stringing anyone along or deceiving them, to me the most important and attractive thing about playing with a player is that they know how to play just for the fun of it and they aren't going to get attached. . I like to think of this entire lifestyle as a game to be played and enjoyed, it's way more fun when everyone knows the rules. :) I don't think that's the same thing. What is "bad" about being played is that the hut generated stems from the horribly obvious realisation that the person who you have feelings for didn't ever consider that their actions would hurt you. You don't warrant a thought for care in their world. It's an unrequited love... and that can be emotionally devastating. Playing or fooling around for the fun of it in the swinger's lifestyle is an entirely different game.HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
would a man that is honest about what he wants but is loving and affectionate towards all women is he a player??? or just a man that is the lovey dovey type that is in touch with his feminine side??? roxxy
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RHP User
15 years ago
From some of the above descriptions I'd define myself as a player. But... from Stalky's decription, which I agree with, I'm NOT a player ! So it is rather confusing. If someone says I'm a player I usually ask them what they mean... what they've noticed in me etc. I am very upfront about wanting a relationship and only wanting ONE man. But.... I don't have that person so I occupy my time with enjoyable encounters. I fit the men around my life but that's more about how busy I am and the limited time I have than about keeping them on a rope. I try and organise my fun times in advance for their benefit as much as mine. I don't lie to any men ! If they ask me if I'm seeing other guys I will tell them. I am not having any random encounters. There's no "one offs". I only have a couple of FWBs and if one of them was interested in pursuing something more serious then I possibly would but I'm pretty sure they only want the super casual thing. Soooo am I a player ? I don't think so ? Am I a tease, a flirt, a lover, a passionate caring woman... YES !! Hugs, Saturn
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RHP User
15 years ago
why must it always be sexual when thingking about someone as a player ,,,, man or woman can both be in it for the game as mentioned above, then again what is being played ??? if you are lied to then hurt from the result the playing is wrong but if someone is 'playing' and it helps to get you feeling good without the intent of anything more than being a friend what is the harm ????? or are they "playing" for themselves ?????? I think in some way everyone is a player to some extent ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Andy xxx
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RHP User
15 years ago
maybe its a WOMAN who is sleeping with many men and telling you "you are the only one" some of you man bashers should realise many women are just as bad as guys Bernie
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'fionabee' Players are paying thier own game. They will have multiple partners without the emotional attachment. Sex is just that....sex. Fun and games. Now I know that can discribe 95% of us on this site but a player will have that extra edge. It doesnt mean that they do not get emotionally attached to thier playmates at all because some of them may turn into really good friends. A player will keep thier playmates on a string without even seeming to do so. Keep them in the background until they are ready, but at the same time manage to keep them happy and friendly. and that's what it's all about, yeah? Quoting 'fionabee' They will tell you up front that they dont want a relationship. They will be honest about that and thier intentions but then they will treat you with such high regard, take note of all the special little things you like and make you feel like there could possibly be something more and then act all surprized when you actually want more. I agree with the first bold part but the rest isn't really the player's fault, is it? They've been honest, they've treated someone with high regard and made not of what they like as any decent person should. How is what person then comes to feel for the player outside the bounds of the original agreement anyone's responsibility but their own? Nobody MAKES someone feel anything, they feel it because it's something that they allow themselves to feel or hope for, oftentimes it's imagined that the player is giving signals or making the person feel that way, but in reality it comes from within, usually from a place of want rather than reason. . Not getting what we want sucks, but when I'm very clear about what I was offering, it really honestly does come as a shock when all of a sudden someone's pissed at me for not giving more. They said they were ok with being friends who fuck but aren't obligated to each other, I've stuck to the original terms and now they're completely ignoring everything I've said because they changed their mind and wanted more and now it's MY fault that they're hurt? They changed the rules halfway through the game and it's just plain not fair. . xx sarah
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'AdventureTime' maybe its a WOMAN who is sleeping with many men and telling you "you are the only one" some of you man bashers should realise many women are just as bad as guys BernieThe player I have obseved is a woman. I certainly am not man bashing. Is this your own guilty conscience talking?
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'curiousnewgirl78' . Not getting what we want sucks, but when I'm very clear about what I was offering, it really honestly does come as a shock when all of a sudden someone's pissed at me for not giving more. They said they were ok with being friends who fuck but aren't obligated to each other, I've stuck to the original terms and now they're completely ignoring everything I've said because they changed their mind and wanted more and now it's MY fault that they're hurt? They changed the rules halfway through the game and it's just plain not fair. . xx sarahNow the player I know says the same thing. Funny that.
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RHP User
15 years ago
...all of them over 6'10" tall and wearing their baseball caps backwards. What do they call me? | Coach. Anybody else like NBA basketball? Just thought I would throw a real "groaner" in before everybody starts going postal on this thread. Has all the potential, and just a warining... | ...that was my best "player" joke. Downhill fast from here.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Miss_Saturn'Soooo am I a player ? I don't think so ? Am I a tease, a flirt, a lover, a passionate caring woman... YES !! Hugs, Saturn I think we are all players... we tease, flirt be lovers and we're passionate caring men and women... but people can still get hurt. They get hurt because we build up all this sexual and emotional tension as part of the game... this changes things... it makes emotional attachments whether we want it to or not... and then seemingly at the drop of the hat... without any acknowlegement at all, we go off on a tangent with someone else using the ... "It's ok to do that because I warned you so".... as self justification. Herein lies the difficulty with all these Fuck-buddy style relationships... someone always wants more than the other... and eventually, usually I think, someone is left disappointed at best and devastated in some instances.I don't know the solutions.... and I don't usually have any emotions of my own apart from cranky or horny (another story for another time).... but I know what I see happening around me to others and they're hurting because eventually they recognise that they have been played... they are made to feel the fool for having an emotional attachment. It's not a question of blaiming someone.. it's just a given fact... the rules haven't been changed, but people fall in love.. it sneaks up on you by accident.... and players fail to notice or do anything about it... that's unrequited love. That's life.HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
sorry fiona i didnt even read your post? or mention your name??? why are you now questioning my conscience ? and calling me guilty? this is exactly what iam talking about Bernie
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RHP User
15 years ago
I believe a distinction also needs to be made between those who are PLAYERS and those who are simply USERS ! Luckily I find USERS are simpler to spot, they have less technique and are a little more blunt. The players are a tricky bunch... they can make you feel like you are the one and only woman (or man) in the world, take you on an emotional roller coaster ride then walk away with no guilt or remorse and repeat it all over again. I've noticed that I've built some very thick walls as a protection against the players. But I risk also blocking out the genuine guys. Nowadays I'm more likely to assume guys only want me for sex and every word they speak is simply a means to get me to drop my pants. I think that's really sad. I'm hoping some great guy will come along and I will learn to believe that he means what he says. Hugs, Saturn
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'AdventureTime' maybe its a WOMAN who is sleeping with many men and telling you "you are the only one" some of you man bashers should realise many women are just as bad as guys Bernie even though my good friend is a man....this wasnt aimed at male or female players exactly i just wanted to know peoples definition of a player...male, female, or anything inbetween roxxy
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'fionabee' Quoting 'curiousnewgirl78' . Not getting what we want sucks, but when I'm very clear about what I was offering, it really honestly does come as a shock when all of a sudden someone's pissed at me for not giving more. They said they were ok with being friends who fuck but aren't obligated to each other, I've stuck to the original terms and now they're completely ignoring everything I've said because they changed their mind and wanted more and now it's MY fault that they're hurt? They changed the rules halfway through the game and it's just plain not fair. . xx sarahNow the player I know says the same thing. Funny that. If someone tells me they're looking for a relationship and I am too, yet they fuck and run, that's wrong.... but if i say I'm not looking for a relationship and they agree, then develop feelings later, am I supposed to be the one in the wrong for sticking to my guns?
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RHP User
15 years ago
a Guy or Girl who leaves thier sport uniform on while shagging you stupid
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'curiousnewgirl78' Quoting 'fionabee' Quoting 'curiousnewgirl78' . Not getting what we want sucks, but when I'm very clear about what I was offering, it really honestly does come as a shock when all of a sudden someone's pissed at me for not giving more. They said they were ok with being friends who fuck but aren't obligated to each other, I've stuck to the original terms and now they're completely ignoring everything I've said because they changed their mind and wanted more and now it's MY fault that they're hurt? They changed the rules halfway through the game and it's just plain not fair. . xx sarahNow the player I know says the same thing. Funny that. If someone tells me they're looking for a relationship and I am too, yet they fuck and run, that's wrong.... but if i say I'm not looking for a relationship and they agree, then develop feelings later, am I supposed to be the one in the wrong for sticking to my guns? I have been called a player many, many times by many men! I don't think it is our fault if the other one falls for them! They are indeed the ones that broke the rules! < I know exactly where you are coming from there! xFunlovingx
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RHP User
15 years ago
I do care. I guess that's what makes me not the negative kind of player. Every one of my playmates is special to me but they're still playmates, not love interests, not potential life partners. I hate hurting anyone's feelings but I still have to put my own best interests first and that means not being obligated to anyone else. . If that means they're disappointed I do feel bad for them, and will try to let them down gently but with unwavering honestly. Them wanting to make me cry over it to make themselves feel better isn't fair to ME, the one who very deliberately never said anything that would hint at offering something more. Taking on guilt for something they feel but I was careful not to encourage won't help either of us and I won't allow myself to take that on. . Sarah x
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'AdventureTime' sorry fiona i didnt even read your post? or mention your name??? why are you now questioning my conscience ? and calling me guilty? this is exactly what iam talking about BernieWere on about all the men bashers and asking why it has to be a man. I just replied is all.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Just like record players, cd players, mp3 players etc. I seem to have discoverd a very wide gamet of players. * Cyber player.....only interested in chatting on line..and even though they keep making a time to meet, they have no intention of ever doing so. Their online persona is all they will ever be. . * Yes, I want a relationship too! player...they will tell you everything they think you want to hear to get into your knickers, then you never hear from them again. . * Straight up players......will tell you they are only interested in fun sensual times, no emotional attachment, seeing other people etc. They keep in touch on a semi-regular basis. . * Emotional vampire players......will suck every emotion out of you, promise the world and deliver nothing. . * For keeps player.....very rare breed, you both start off just playing with each other, the relationship and bond between you blossums and grows....if you find one, dont let them go! lol
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RHP User
15 years ago
No players are not wrong. They are unfailing honest. They do try and let thier play mates down gently and many times they retain the friendship. Please dont get me wrong ladies as I have watched one in action over a long time and it IS an art form. I greatly admire the skill at which SHE plays with her mates. It is second nature to her and nothing and no one will change her, and curiousnewgirl...she could be typing your comments as it is exactly what she would say and has said to me on many occassions...usually when one of her playmates has gotten too close
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'wowwow09'a Guy or Girl who leaves thier sport uniform on while shagging you stupid or comes straight from a Dungeons & Dragons tournament at the local RPG shop still wearing their mage's robe and smelling faintly of Fanta and M&Ms and wants to show you how "Lawful Evil Assassins do it from behind" if you can roll a 9 or greater . "ohhhh yeah baby..... roll that D20..." . . . . Quoting 'fionabee'No players are not wrong. They are unfailing honest. They do try and let thier play mates down gently and many times they retain the friendship. Please dont get me wrong ladies as I have watched one in action over a long time and it IS an art form. I greatly admire the skill at which SHE plays with her mates. It is second nature to her and nothing and no one will change her, and curiousnewgirl...she could be typing your comments as it is exactly what she would say and has said to me on many occassions...usually when one of her playmates has gotten too close ah, my bad, fionabee. I think i misread you as sounding sterner than you mean to be sometimes. (might be the big font!) xx Sarah
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RHP User
15 years ago
i dont see Curious or Fionabee's friend as players, all i see is two girls that are honest about what they want they are upfront and honest, neither is trying to con anyone or pretend they are something they are not they arent telling a man/woman what he/she wants to hear to get him/her into bed til someone better comes along i was chatting to a bloke from Wagga, who told me he wanted everything i did, who told me he really wanted to meet me, he thought i was great so he said...but im fairly sure now he had no intentions at all of ever meeting me...in my opinion, he played me (he would be one of Ruby's cyber players lol) so to me we have the players...the ones that lie and use decete to get what they want and have a few people on the go at the same time the users...the ones that lie and cheat to just get sex then are never heard from again so im thinking maybe there are just all sorts of "players" not just the one type hmmm i wonder if my friend is getting anything from this roxxy
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RHP User
15 years ago
Ever heard the quote, Don't hate the player, hate the game?? See if the game has rules and are set out from the beginning then noone gets played, correct??
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RHP User
15 years ago
A player is a person generally a woman who is 45 + who is wanting to meet a 25+ PARTNER.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'curiousnewgirl78'ah, my bad, fionabee. I think i misread you as sounding sterner than you mean to be sometimes. (might be the big font!)lmfao.... yeah... why are some people always shouting? I mean.. Fiona! Turn up your hearing aid dammit! :pHugsS
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'stalky' Quoting 'curiousnewgirl78' ah, my bad, fionabee. I think i misread you as sounding sterner than you mean to be sometimes. (might be the big font!)lmfao.... yeah... why are some people always shouting? I mean.. Fiona! Turn up your hearing aid dammit! :pHugsSAt our advanced age Stalky as you should be aware...it is the failing eyesight, probably from too much masterbation as a youngster! See your mother was right..,.you will go blind.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Alfred_Hitchcock' Quoting 'GirlTuesday'Know how to walk the walk and talk the talk...they hide the monopoly money under the game board whilst you aren't looking, and move their game piece past go and collect $200 :)Users...put in oodles of effort to entice you to meet them, then drop you like a hot potato once they have got what they wanted from you um...sugarbabes do the same thing.....quoting..... "they drop you like a hot potatoe once they get what they want".......i am an experienced sugardaddie and i would 100% agree with that - as younger fems do in fact do this.... ... .... see, i always thought a sugardaddy was an old man with lots of money ready to drop dead lol...boy i was wrong with that one no old man of 99 has an arse like that roxxy
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'fionabee' At our advanced age Stalky as you should be aware...it is the failing eyesight, probably from too much masterbation as a youngster! See your mother was right..,.you will go blind. Oh my GOD. You're right. And it explains why my right eye is weakening before my left eye! And the solution is so obvious too. I need to change hands! :-PI'm glad we cleared that up!E.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Everyone has a different take on the definition of a player. I think we make it what we want it to be - good or bad.
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RHP User
15 years ago
there seems to be more playing with ones self going on around here ,,,,,,,,,,,,,, I think I see women playing other women and men playing other men ,,,,But not playing with some quotes are aimed at replies more so then the content of the quote in the first place if you dont play fair go sit on the bench and be quiet Andy xxx
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'andreweagle' there seems to be more playing with ones self going on around here ,,,,,,,,,,,,,, I think I see women playing other women and men playing other men ,,,,But not playing with some quotes are aimed at replies more so then the content of the quote in the first place if you dont play fair go sit on the bench and be quiet Andy xxxI never was much good at doing as I was told. I know, it is a serious flaw in my charater. Can't I just sit quietly in the corner...and play with myself?
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