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RHP

RHP User

F51

Your most embarrassing moments during SEXI TIME???

April 04 2011

Good onya Pups and Roxxy, fun forum time I was sooo excited when an FWB was over one night, i ran out in my cougar outfit (by outfit i don’t mean i was dressed as the animal, just in the print, stilettos and slip...lol!). The night started off great, within 5 min he picked me up like a cave man threw me over his shoulder, marched straight to the bedroom, threw me on the bed, ripped his clothes off and jumped in. Then i umm guess i wanted to pounce on him? (i was a little over excited at the time) instead i launched myself a with a little too much power (i was dead keen to get into it) and flew over the top of him and then ‘splat’ on the floor (thought my new king bed was too big for such an incident...guess not)... uhhh not quite what i was going for....... but it prolly wasn’t as bad as when i stuck a few too many fingers up a virgin bum a little too hard opps.... it was going so well to begin with... and then again i just got too excited, jammed a couple more fingers in too forcefully.... he went splat too, but it was on the ceiling, that was instant game ova for SEXI TIME as it took a few minutes for the pain to subside... I think i was doing the laughing apology too... we did laugh a lot about it later... eventually. Plus scary movie at the cinema, went to grab the hand, karate chopped his bits opps...and was going crazy on a dance floor doing that poggo jumping thing with everyone (i was doing muay thai up to 10 hours a week, over a decade ago) and i went into auto pilot and did my strongest move which i did a lot of at training, a powerful knee to the balls (same guy too)...

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Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Oh gawd thanks for the laughs Booba You gave him an SRI and a DRI all in the one night sex related injury, and a disco related injury just too funny

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    I arrived at the hotel room first and checked in, had a bath, put on some skimpy lingerie and dolled myself up, waiting for him to arrive. Except he was running late and I hadn't though of bringing a cross-stitch or sudoku or taxidermy project to occupy myself in the meantime! . So I sat there, bored and twiddling my thumbs (and yes, probably nipples too) for about an hour until I heard a knock at the door. I raced over, flung the door back, leapt across the threshold and into his arms, and then heard the door click shut behind me. . Cue an awkward fifteen minute wait while I stood conspicuously in my underwear in the hotel corridor while he went to fetch a spare key, while I nodded and smiled at the passing families and elderly people, and prayed that the security video footage wouldn't end up on youtube later on! Awesome forum topic Boobalicious! Tinks

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Damn, Boobalicious, Are you trying to scare men off with your tales of woe? hahaha. I think I really will need that hard hat, if I am ever to be apart of your club !

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Oh boob, do you now issue your dates with crash helmets, knee pads and a ball protector :). I think the most embarrassing thing for me (or at least one I am willing to share) is.......granny undies. I didnt expect to get down and dirty so had very boring undies on. Fuck I still turn red thinking about it. So now they are all in the bin and only sexy ones remain.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    A girl once farted on me when we were having sex. It was one hell of a fart actually. I could feel it vibrating all the way along my cock, and the rush of air over my ballls was equisite. We both fell about laughing . . .

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    there i was lying down enjoying a very good tounge session from my ex, my sister walked in the door without knocking and proceeded to sit there and talk to me....all the while my ex was still under the blanket. when i finally confessed where he was i dont know who was more embarrsed!! still, to this day she always knocks before entering my house : D xx

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Boobs, you should come with a health warning! Hehehehe To the lady with the pillow, Learnt that lesson the hard way, always dress for success, I bet it wasn't a deal breaker though. I actually think your pic is pretty hot, suggestive, alluring and sensual....Berry nice!I can't remember any thing particularly embarrassing happening to me.....other than brewers droop.Ahh well....back in Goulburn for eight days R&R....Likely hood of Vodka, Rammstein and sex tonight.....Extreme!Cheers Nev.........Debs you have taken your piccy down.....

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    thats too funny Boobs . i have one up on Cruisin.....when i last went to Sydney a few months back i was on the bed on all 4s wearing a sexy purple number, flapping my naked arse in the air (who knows what the hell i was doing) when i farted and not just a little lady like fluff...i farted a tune that wouldnt stop i laughed so damn hard...still farting like a trucker...i fell off the bed and landed on his laptop with a huge bang yeah that was the end of sexy time.....all i could do was lay on the ground STILL farting but laughing hysterically . then another time with my ex...he tied my arms to the bed but couldnt find anything to tie my legs too, so he got some of those dumb bell weight things and tied my legs to those...i had one hell of an orgasm, lifted one leg and smacked him in the mouth with a dumb bell...now that was one fat lip that was hard to explain away roxxy ...more will come later

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Whatever one takes your fancy at the moment Deb will be Lovely. Cheers Nev

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    U r too much, they aRe going sack me at work for all the rip snorting laughing I keep doing when reading about ur experiences?! Hahahha I am glad I have dine my kegal exercises! Love ur work girl!! X

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    I have done something similiar instead I was at the Park Hyatt 5 star in Melbourne...where they have security keycards ...not keys...to get up and down the elevators.... I had a bathrobe on....around 5.30 pm...when ppl are coming and going in the lobby.... um...this is where the ex prime minister stays when in melbourne... . .....err and no underpants on underneath...nothing...!! I went out the door to do something....and forgot to stop the door from closing behind me.... .....any way..i had to venture out downstairs into the lobby in peak hour wearing just a bath robe.....to get a keycard so i could get back up the elevators and back into my large king sized suite....and continue with my spa...... ...oops.... Over the hall from room 1101 and Taipan was at work and could not rescue me. I had to go down all by myslef in my jammies.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Don't some of u like pain, that belongs somewhere in BDSM yeah??) hehehe that was it and it was over a 12 year stretch. I am sure others have done worse, surely?? And sidd as long as u wear your tool belt and hard hat at all times, u will have nothing to worry about ;)

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  • Bubbaj

    Bubbaj

    15 years ago

    back when i had just started my first ever job at a chiropractic place. I was in charge of cleaning up and locking up. Gotta love those beds. being so young and being with my first ever boyfriend and having absolutely nowhere to go to have some fun, the workplace was the best place to be!so it was like around the 7pm mark and i had closed the shop already at 5. we were well into it, butt naked and writhing when all of a sudden, i hear the back door open to the shop! there is absolutely nowhere to hide except under the beds where there are bars! anywho, i hear the day receptionist with her husband talking and walking in. me with the bf under the table ducking our heads and then we hear "oh my god! what the hell!" really loudly from the husband....his wifey going "what, whats wrong". thankfully, the husband goes "i think i saw a rat, lets get out of here and come back later when it has gone". He would of seen my butt naked boyfriends behind! I am soooooooooooo thankful for the husband to be so nice and understand and walk out and let me and the boyfriend get dressed and run out of there without being caught by his wife i was so embarassed by this that i ended up quitting that week, just becoz i dont think i could of faced the wifey just in case he happend to tell her!!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Quoting 'CarlosSpicyWienr' Boobs, you should come with a health warning! Hehehehe To the lady with the pillow, Learnt that lesson the hard way, always dress for success, I bet it wasn't a deal breaker though. I actually think your pic is pretty hot, suggestive, alluring and sensual....Berry nice! I can't remember any thing particularly embarrassing happening to me.....other than brewers droop. Ahh well....back in Goulburn for eight days R&R....Likely hood of Vodka, Rammstein and sex tonight.....Extreme! Cheers Nev.........Debs you have taken your piccy down..... Thanx Nev

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Thanks Boobs, thanks all but especially thanks Tassie for your efforts!I've got a fart story or two that I'm not going to mention as I'm still embarrassed and that was years ago..still friends with with the girl though.Have also had too many interruptions by in-laws while in compromising situations, think they have learned to knock now but they still always seem to find any naughty pic I have on camera or phone.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Similar experience to Naughtygirl4310 Except I was giving my girlfriend a good tongue serve when her mum walked in my legs were out from under the blankets her legs were out and over her head her mum just laughed and said ok we will get locks tomorrow get back to it kids hahaha

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    When I was a teenager, my g/f & I were having a bit of a grope when her little sister walked into her room. Sister says "What are YOU two doing?". Quick as a flash, my g/f says "We were arm wrestling & slipped". Sister says "Oh, OK then" & continues on her innocent way . . .

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    i had seen a gorgeous fireman a couple of times...big muscles, beautiful face and a cock to be proud of mmmmm at the time i had my message tone set as a standing ovation on my phone...you know, lots of clapping, whoohooo's and yee haaas well we found a nice quiet spot and he was pantsless in my car, i was quiet happy listening to him moan and groan while i was sucking his cock, when i say "do you mind if we dont have sex, i just feel like playing???", nope he is fine with that lol so im sucking and licking away, he is fingering my arse and i hear his little groan that means he is about to cum...so i take his cock in nice as deep, as far as i can and i swallow his whole load.....just in time for a standing ovation yep thats right...nice timing, i got a text just as i had swallowed it all all i could do, cock still in my mouth, giggle and giggle some more lol roxxy...missing that yummy fireman

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Quoting 'TassieRose' i had seen a gorgeous fireman a couple of times...big muscles, beautiful face and a cock to be proud of mmmmm at the time i had my message tone set as a standing ovation on my phone...you know, lots of clapping, whoohooo's and yee haaas well we found a nice quiet spot and he was pantsless in my car, i was quiet happy listening to him moan and groan while i was sucking his cock, when i say "do you mind if we dont have sex, i just feel like playing???", nope he is fine with that lol so im sucking and licking away, he is fingering my arse and i hear his little groan that means he is about to cum...so i take his cock in nice as deep, as far as i can and i swallow his whole load.....just in time for a standing ovation yep thats right...nice timing, i got a text just as i had swallowed it all all i could do, cock still in my mouth, giggle and giggle some more lol roxxy...missing that yummy firemanThat isn't embaressing, that is fucking COOL!!!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    I was young and had a bit to drink.. plus pizza, anyway my and i girlfriend were at it when i said let me fuck you up the ass, this would be our first anal experience, she said no but after i told her how great it would be she agreed. She hops on to her knees and i lube up and enter.....gosh this is still embarrassing after all this time.....ill tell you what see if you can guess what happened next..a prize to the winner

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Quoting 'SORENTOSEXY'I was young and had a bit to drink.. plus pizza, anyway my and i girlfriend were at it when i said let me fuck you up the ass, this would be our first anal experience, she said no but after i told her how great it would be she agreed. She hops on to her knees and i lube up and enter.....gosh this is still embarrassing after all this time.....ill tell you what see if you can guess what happened next..a prize to the winner ewwwwwwww too gross for words hahaha roxxy...wonders what her prize will be

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Sorrentosexy one of either 2 things come to mind here did you hurl or did she go ? lmao here

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    The news (actually from the LA Times):"In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to retrieve the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital.Tomaszewski, and his homosexual partner Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong. "I pushed a cardboard tube up his rectum and slipped Raggot, our gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out "Armageddon", my cue that he'd had enough. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he wouldn't come out again, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman describedwhat happened next."The match ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a flame shot out the tube, igniting Mr Tomaszewski's hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out like a cannonball."Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Sorry but that was EXTREMLY FUNNY.....how embarrassing Cmon Sorrento.we are waiting

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Still no end of the story? C'mon Sorrentosexy spill

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Thank you for that Boobalicious. . I haven't laughed so hard in a while. Where's that ROFL emoticon when you need it? . It took me more than five minutes to read the whole thing as I couldn't stop laughing and had tears in my eyes. . Oh my. . I'm still giggling and smiling now as I think about it ten minutes later. . As for my embarrassing story. So I'd known this girl through high school and we'd fooled around once or twice but hadn't gone all the way. A year or two out of school we bumped into each other at the pub where we had quite a few drinks. One thing led to another and we ended up back at my mate's place where I was crashing for the night. A bit of touching, some oral for both of us and then she suddenly gets up and asks where the toilet is. She made it about 4 steps towards the door before spewing (I think she got the spins whilst I was going down on her). But wait that's not the embarrassing part. . So I cleaned up while she had a chat on the big white phone and I gave her a lift home the next morning after cuddling all night (on a side note we caught up again a few weeks later and had a much better experience). . So fast forward a bit to my 21st. A few drinks a few speeches, no problems. Mate stands up and tells this wonderful story about how it was my cock going down her throat that made her spew. (Thanks mate, I appreciate it. Don't you ever do something like that again). . So luckily the young lady wasn't present, though a number of people knew and I'm sure it was passed on to those that didn't know. . However! Here's the embarrassing bit (a sarcastic "finally" comes from the crowd). As it was my 21st my largish extended family had all gathered to celebrate with me. From 10 year old cousins through to my elderly Grandmother. Oh the awkwardness of having my Grandother make a ribald comment and a laugh to me when she left later on (I'd never heard this woman swear before and she was a ringer for Hyacinth from "Keeping up Appearences"). . Note to self: NEVER again tell mates funny or awkward sexual experiences. . Sorry if my post is a bit disjointed. This here is me trying to keep a post short. . Cheers Rusty

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    well when i withdrew something unexpected happen and i threwup or over her back then she twisted to srceam at me and i threwup on her head, then she threwup which made me throwup evenmore, she never called me back, and i thought we conected, it was a great nite upto the ass vomit moment. What do you think sould i have been given another chance? after all she brought the pizza

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Quoting 'SORENTOSEXY' well when i withdrew something unexpected happen and i threwup or over her back then she twisted to srceam at me and i threwup on her head, then she threwup which made me throwup evenmore, she never called me back, and i thought we conected, it was a great nite upto the ass vomit moment. What do you think sould i have been given another chance? after all she brought the pizza It was a spew fest thanks so much for the laugh. You have to sometimes, or you'll cry.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    LMFAO Now ~ that sounds like my idea of a good root!! *mental note* install fire hose reel in dungeon.HugsStalky Quoting 'dontgothere' Quoting 'SORENTOSEXY' well when i withdrew something unexpected happen and i threwup or over her back then she twisted to srceam at me and i threwup on her head, then she threwup which made me throwup evenmore, she never called me back, and i thought we conected, it was a great nite upto the ass vomit moment. What do you think sould i have been given another chance? after all she brought the pizza It was a spew fest thanks so much for the laugh. You have to sometimes, or you'll cry.

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