When things go "Pear shaped"...

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  RHP User

  14 years ago

  be a mighty uncomfortable position to be left in Mrs Sat I can't offer a story, as I dont really play with couples, but it IS one of the reasons why I wouldnt, sheesh enough drama in my own life lol

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  RHP User

  14 years ago

  I have to stop reading, I haven't even finished the first sentence..... I can't stop staring at your delicious nipple. Back to the top......

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  RHP User

  14 years ago

  That is why I would never play with an inexperienced couple. I think people think the group sex scene is really easy and fun and it is their biggest fantasy, yada yada but the reality of what it actually is like can be very different to expectations. It can freaky the first few times and alot of the time I find that men can choke and are not able to perform or one person suddenly realises that they are not prepared for how they feel when the see their partner with someone else. You just can not predict how you will feel.... no matter how prepared you think you are. So best to have some safe word between you to know that you have to stop and re-group before things get out of hand and someone cracks it!xxMeeka

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  RHP User

  14 years ago

  Gotta be flexible and adapt and communicate..........I prefer guidelines not rules (too rigid), common sense and consideration of everyone.Cass xxx

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  RHP User

  14 years ago

  Quoting 'Meeka100' That is why I would never play with an inexperienced couple. I think people think the group sex scene is really easy and fun and it is their biggest fantasy, yada yada but the reality of what it actually is like can be very different to expectations. It can freaky the first few times and alot of the time I find that men can choke and are not able to perform or one person suddenly realises that they are not prepared for how they feel when the see their partner with someone else. You just can not predict how you will feel.... no matter how prepared you think you are. So best to have some safe word between you to know that you have to stop and re-group before things get out of hand and someone cracks it!xxMeekaIts a bit like applying for your first job though, everyone wants an experienced hand but no one will give you that first experience !

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  Two_Tarts

  14 years ago

  When we first started we were very sure of ourselves and we thought we had it all worked out.   But as Meeka said you just never know how you will feel no matter how prepared you think you are. We had a couple of confronting experiences in the beginining where one or the other of us was not completely comfortable or happy with how things were going while the other was completely oblivious. While we kept our act together at the time we did not have a clear strategy to deal with it and so we perhaps made the mistake of biting our tongues and letting it play out so that we did not cause embaresment to ourselves or anyone else. It would be fair to say that we had some fairly interesting conversations in the car on the way home from those couple of experiences. So we learn't the hard way where the dangers lay for us and how to deal with them. It is interesting that since then we have been out with new couples where one or the other of them has plainly experienced the same unexpected feelings that we had and we presume that they had similar interesting discussions on the way home. It seems it is something that everyone has to learn some time and that experience is the only teacher.   If there is one thing you should prepare for it is what strategy you will use at the time to deal with the unexpected things that will come up which you did not forsee and therfore had not specifically prepared yourself for.   We have a very simple policy now that we tell our friends up front that if they (or we) feel uncomfortable at any time it is absolutely ok and encouraged that they should say so regardless of what ever else is going on. For us it is all about everyone having some light hearted fun together and the last thing we would want is for anyone to feel uncomfortable. So we are happy to stop or shift back to a combination where we or they can feel more relaxed, secure, and comfortable at any time if necessary. We only meet with other couples and so if anyone is uncomfortable it just means that we spend our time with our own partners in each others company and there is nothing bad about that as an outcome. We actually find that once everyone is feeling a bit more comfortable, secure, and supported the motivation to move forward often returns anyway and the the final result is always much better if everyone is genuinely relaxed and enjoying themselves.   If only we had figured this out sooner we would probably still be friends with a few more of those people we met early on and we could have prevented a few tense car rides.   P & N xxx

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  RHP User

  14 years ago

  The first time :)

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  RHP User

  14 years ago

  We haven't had any issues. We usually take the time to meet the couple socially first where we can get a good idea where they are at with it all as a couple. They get a chance to hear where our minds are to and see if there could be any issues. We are very cautious of new couples and much prefer people that know what they like and are completely comfortable with it all . We wouldn't completely rule someone new out though as most people are fast learners. If it was a new couple we would tread lightly to begin with.I guess a lot of the issues usually rise from insecurity's and jealousy. We find a all in group approach in this situation keeps everyone's minds on the fun all at once and no one is left sulking in a corner.Tim

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  QLDtwo4fun

  14 years ago

  We have been in a club where was an obvious dispute between a couple, who were both very very intoxicated. She had unbelievably found a willing single guy, he was obviously not of interest to anyone else and didn't want her to play with anyone if he wasn't. My observations of the situation are: Excessive alcohol and swinging don't mix. Make rules about what you are both comfortable with and stick to them. In defense of the club, I think they had been drinking from a supply in her bag, rather than the bar where patrons are required to leave their drinks, and they were both fairly rapidly asked to leave the club.

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  RHP User

  14 years ago

  We became friends with a couple that by chance became great friends within one year, Somehow we all ended up naked and mucking about (we totally loved it) and they seemed to as well. Each time we all got together it went a little bit further, We all openly spoke and accepted to only go as far as we were all comfortable with, This was totally new to all of us, Now for the Kick in the guts: Unfortunately it all went pear shape one night we were all naked mucking about and one of them stopped and was upset The couple comforted each other! We don’t know what they both said but that was the end of that.(Booo) but we have to respect them. After that our friendship hit a quiet/ bad patch for 6 months (that really hurt us they were great friends) We have persisted to try and keep their friendship and things between us all are now great but we have never spoken or done anything like that with them again We never started out wanting to play like we did it just happened or friendship was unreal we all just clicked. We all never swapped for sex it never got that far (yes we wanted to)(yes it came close very close) Yes we would love to play with them again, it opened our eyes to another way of life one that is awesome fun. But we want their friendship more and don’t want to cause tension between us all by perusing our sexual desires. In all it was worth it but it now sucks that we are no longer playing. (That’s how we ended up joining redhotpie) Would love to know if they just had a moment of (this is wrong) but now realize they still want to play, it’s not a question we know how to ask especially if they only want our friendship.if you have any suggestions speak up!cheers!

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  N4November

  14 years ago

  Same same Ms Saturn - have been the 3rd wheel where I was spoilt to bits! I always had a fantasy of being the girlfriend of a couple and we would go away on little naughty trips and had lots and lots of naughty fun together with no strings attached, other than being wonderful friends together awwwwww lolI've seen various situations at small private parties and larger group ones. From the 'permission granted' nod of a wife to her hubby, to feeling like a carcass of 2 ravenous lions by another couple! But I don't think most dramas actually occur insitu - I think most people take it home with them to fight it out. Actually, I think the fight game plan was already in play and the orgy was just the decider how the last argument will turn out!But in the main, I have been blessed to have been pleasured unconditionally by some open and sexy couples. There's probably only 1 exception to those experiences - where the female was so alpha and her partner was not allowed to look at me sideways let alone touch me properly - that the competitive nature of the playdate put me off playing with another couple for nearly a year! But fortunately, that feeling has long gone.But when you 'click' and there's no jealousy, it's just magic heh?!!xx

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  RHP User

  14 years ago

  Interesting majority of posts from females and couples !Well from the single male perspective, meeting with a couple can be a daunting experience. After over 10 years 'playing' with couples I have only had 3 bad experiences. Each of which I called to a halt and suggested they have a chat after I have gone and decide if this is what they want.Now days I meet with no expectations and make this clear to them, I do question them particularly if they are first timers and if they are, then I always say lets meet again and see if you feel same way. I also insist that anyone can stop at anytime. Everyone has to feel comfortable. I have heard some terrible stories of guys entering into threesome and basically using the female.It all comes back to respect for your fellow human being. love to all x

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