M61
What is the funniest thing you have experienced when having sex
January 03 2012
Comments
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RHP User
14 years ago
Yes, has happened a couple of times. The most recent was at home. Having a daughter and her bf living with me has meant I have to get more creative or wait for everyone to leave the house. One evening the kids were out and I had the house all to myself as they were going to an all night party. My fwb came over and we were getting amorous on the couch which is in full view of the front door. One thing lead to another and clothes were strewn all over the floor. For some reason I looked and saw two shadows approaching through the glass in the front door. Quick I yelled out "quick hide" Grabbed his hand, we lept off the couch grabbing what clothing we could slipping and sliding on the polished floor. Adrenalin pumping as we flew past the front door and shutting the bedroom door just as the frong door opened. We both burst into laughter as neither of us thought the other could run that fast. It was a good 20m dash in under what seemed like 2 seconds. Felt like teenagers hiding from the parents!
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platinumblonde69
14 years ago
Geez. I have a few but the funniest one would have to be when I was about 17 and having a sleep over at my boyfriends house. We were having sex and he was going for it on top, panting and breathing heavily, and next minute his mum walked in and turned the light on. Im not sure who was the most embarrassed. Him, being caught in the act, or his poor mum, for thinking her poor son was having a bad asthma attack....hahahhaa...Plat
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platinumblonde69
14 years ago
Geez..Memories...Once I started thinking about my younger years I had so many flash backs....This would also rate highly in my funniest sex moments book, if I wrote one...hahaha...In Qld for holidays with the girls back years ago, many years ago, we would always pick up and try to wander off by ourselves for some quiet passionate moments. I decided it would be fun to escort my "pick up" to the roof top of the high rise where we were staying....It was great on a hot steamy nite...Great views, nice and cool....Great sex...It was getting late so we decided we had better rejoin the group again so we went to go back downstairs and.......damn....fuck it...lol....the door was locked.....As it turned out the doors were locked for the night so we spent the whole nite in a deck chair watching the sunset...It was quite nice but funny as at the time and i did have some explaining to do to my girlfriends...hahahaha...Plat
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RHP User
14 years ago
Good ones, Girly and Plat,I had a similar one Plat, where my Mum came in when I was fully into it.All she could say was would your friend like a cup of tea................lol
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RHP User
14 years ago
Years and years and years ago when I was 19 I had an encounter with my girlfriend at the time in the park. We decided to try a little publc sex and take advantage of the thrill of maybe being seen. She left her dress and stilletoes (4 inches or so) on, removing only her knickers and off we went in the missionary position. Everything was going fantastically and we were both climbing up towards a pretty massive climax. She started cumming and I was just about to when she brought her high heels down whilst in the throes of passion. The point of the stilleto heel went right into my left calf just below the knee. Never had any idea how painful that could be. I yelped and went almost instantly soft while she was moaning and groaning. After it was all over I sat there with a very angry spot on my calf still giving me grief. She was mortified, she thought I had just cum inside her and then gone soft!!!! We had a bit of a laugh and it became a bit of an in-joke about heels for us.
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bubbles_n_flash
14 years ago
We were just changing positions and Flash slipped (lost his balance) and elbowed Bubbles in the face resulting in a nose bleed.Not funny at the time... but hilarious now.Bubbles & Flash
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RHP User
14 years ago
I used to live with a bunch of girls who would have parties all the time. We had a huge party and I went to bed with my then boyfriend. We went at it most of the night in this old fashioned wooden bed that had the springs going and the headboard bang bang on the wall. All went well, off to sleep and we got up and were just looking for clothes and I bent down and there was a guy under the bed! He crawled out, and said you guys had nice night and walked out the door I had no idea who the hell he was, and we were both so surprised we just stood there, and then cracked up!
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RHP User
14 years ago
We were shagging on the sofa in my girlfriends parents home. We were baby sitting and the kids were all asleep.Parents walked in 2 hours early with P sitting on me on the sofa.She was wearing a big floppy skirt.Had to stay that way for an hour, terrified tat if the skirt moved the funky smell would give us away..still love those floppy skirts...
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RHP User
14 years ago
An ex and I were going at it in the shower and decided to sit down in the shower for a bit to have her on top. After a while we decided to swap again and she used the ceramic soap holder to help her up. Part of it broke off and sliced my shoulder open. She was freaking out I was laughing but that's the funniest thing besides having my parents bust you in the morning in the throws of passion :-)
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RHP User
14 years ago
I'm 17, three days into a farming apprenticeship and the BF comes up on the weekend to celebrate with me. (Hard to get a farm when you're a lass from the 'burbs competing with sixteen year old farmerboys.) Anyway, we wander off for some privacy and end up "parking" on a grassy slope at **** *****. Much fun is had in a contortionist kind of way until we have to leave...who knew RT Chargers weren't designed for wet grassy slopes? One am and we're calling my new boss to tow us out.
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RHP User
14 years ago
and never ever share a room with cats.
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RHP User
14 years ago
I used to take in lodgers,there was a fly in fly out guy,rather cute One night he had a few drinks and decided to hit on the landlady i.e. me So I dashed into my bedroom and lit a few candles, been a while thought I would set the scene He climbs into bed, were going at it and he says, shit you are really hot I am thinking thanks hon, but then I realise I am really hot! Iin the corner of my eye I see the pillow has been moved as we were fucking and the corner caught the flame of the candle Well all hell broke loose, the pillow caught quickly he jumped up and pushed it away but it caught the curtains Shit shit we were running around like mad things and he threw his stubby of beer on the ever increasing flames The house alarm went off I was laughing so hard in the end I grabbed the pillow and threw it in the shower, and ran and got a bucket of water and put out the curtain He lost his hard, but I laughed so hard I was crying Nearly put me off sex had been two years and then this was my first go back in the saddle My daughters came over and saw the big burnt hole I said,let that be a warning girls do no go have a shower with a lit candle in the house.
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luvsilver
14 years ago
A bit like Tuscanreds story It was back in our early days,we had a few candles going on in the room (still love candles) Enigma playing on the tapedeck-lol (it was the early 90s and yes Mrs Luvsilver was still using tapes) All was going well and we were quite busy with each other ,not sure if the incense we had burning hid the smell for a while but one of the candles had burnt right down and kept going melting its way into the clock radio that was sitting on the bedside table.Smoke was now starting to billow out from the clock.We ripped it out of the wall,threw it outside and went back to what we were doing. Mr Luvsilver
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RHP User
14 years ago
Apart from all the accidental head butts, elbows to the face, dumped on the floor or between the slats of a broken bed, there was one time that will never leave me.We were indulging in some very vocal empty house sex, talking dirty and grunting/moaning, when I yell out "GOD, I LOVE YOU!".We slowed, slowed, stopped, like a flicked spring reaching its original position. Se looked up at me with an embarrassed yet smugly amused expression, as if to say "Ha! I KNEW you'd be the first to break!". "What!?" she says.Looking down, groping for words, I said "I meant, I love fucking you. Yeah." I don't blush much but I must have gone bright red. She giggled so much we had to stop for a bit. And she hasn't let me forget it to this day. Stupid fairies.Maybe you had to be there, but it felt like pure rebellion within me.Oh and another time about ten years ago I was getting the most amazing blowjob (to that date) in my gf's share house, in the lounge when her housemate+1 walk in just as I go off. Unfortunately my gf was startled and had released me about half a second prior. It hit her face under pressure, just as we both looked up at the front door. We looked into their eyes and they into ours as a large glob splooched its way across her face and dangled there, with me dumping the rest into the underside of the couch throw rug. This orgasm was so intense because I had to hide it, coupled with embarrassment, that I let out a tiny yet totally identifiable moan. We stood there for a while, then my gf started giggling uncontrollably as she wiped it off, and ran to the bathroom sounding for all the world like the wicked witch of the west. "HAAAHAHAHAHAHA!".Her housemate calmly walked into the kitchen, put the groceries on the bench and said "so who's up for a coffee then?" While her boyfriend pissed himself laughing. Bastards!RA
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RHP User
14 years ago
A few years back, I had once been seeing a guy for a while (okay, I would call it 'seeing' because I'm a girl, he would call it 'fucking' because he's a tough masculine unemotional bloke), and despite my assurances that I did not have any romantic feelings for him, he would constantly taunt me about having to break things off before I 'fell in love with him'. Anyway, one day or night or afternoon or morning (really, it wasn't very memorable) we were in bed, having quite a good time, when all of the sudden he stops thrusting, looks straight at me and yells directly into my startled face "GOD I LOVE YOU!" I dissolved into fits of laughter as he went bright red and tried to pretend that he had said "God I love fucking you", but I always knew the truth. .He was quite a nice guy, actually. I wonder whatever happened to him?.Tinks
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RHP User
14 years ago
Anyways :P Not exactly a "sex story" but funny as fuck... My son decided to announce, in my workplace, in front of my boss.... that every time I had sex in the flat, he had to go to the toilet and turn on the exhaust until we were done, as that was the only way to ensure he wouldn't hear it!!! *siiiiiiigh*
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RHP User
14 years ago
One night I came home from work, and soon after my fwb at the time had arrived and we pretty much started to get it on in the doorway. She suggested that we continue in my bedroom, so full of steam I picked her up and walked with her wrapped around me to my room. I didnt have a full view of the bed when I threw her and she bounced off the edge of the bed and landed on the floor, legs up with this stunned look on her face! After I saw she was ok, I helped her up, we both had a laugh and a bit of slap n tickle and we got back into it!
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RHP User
14 years ago
when i was about 18 was going at it with then gf pretty hard and fast doggy style when i pulled out a bit too far and missed on the reentry. I bent what felt like in half instantly knew i was going to actually b sick so jumped from the bed hit the doorframe dislocating my shoulder ran the 15foot to bathroom where i slipped on the floor and ended up inside the bathtub. luckily i wasnt sick but i laughed so hard i couldnt breathe gf then took me to the emergency ward for the shoulder
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RHP User
14 years ago
Loving this thread....Okay, so we were young (about 19 ish) and at Uni, getting all hot and heavy in Mr Addy's apartment room....I reached up onto the shelf above us to get some tissues and in doing so, pulled the shelf down onto Mr Addy's head...there was blood everywhere and I panicked, running around the room starkers and banging on the room next door to drive us to hospital......then there was the call to 'the parents'...now that took some explaining and a few knowing looks from the A&E doctors. Mr Addy still wears the scar on his forehead today...I like to think of it as my 'branding' lol.Mrs Addy
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RHP User
14 years ago
About two weeks ago,my fwb and myself decided on a day at the beach complete with video camera,for a spot of movie making.After some great head footage, and oral action it was down to business,and i positioned myself,ass in air while he stood filming with an unmissable erection. Just as he was about to go for it i looked up to see a bloody film crew emerge over a sand dune! i instantly collapsed with him on top of me,and just giggled as the film crew looked around desperately for another location.The film turned out great btw!
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RHP User
14 years ago
Was having an awesome fuck with a former girlfriend in her backyard late one night .Was on top going my hardest when i felt this tounge licking my arse and nuts. I looked around to see what it was ,it was my friends german shepherd pup. We cracked up severely, so did the boys at work when I told them. I am sure glad that dog wasn,t hungry.
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