M48
What during sex or about sex makes YOU laugh???? LOL LOL LOL LOL :D:P:S. CONFESS
April 26 2011
Comments
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RHP User
15 years ago
seeing how you already told one of my clumsy bum tales in your OP I have to come up with some new material dont I . Ok now this isn't a proud moment either, but it's something I giggle about now that I can. Now picture this, a long night, a few champagnes, one super HOT young dark haired creature, who just happened to be looking at me with that same hungry look in his eye, (thankgod lol) Me thinking, "Oh man am I gonna eat you alive when I get you alone" Him thinking, (dunno didn't really care either pmsl) Finally get alone, hot steamy scene ensues with clothing flying everywhere and being ripped down off legs at the speed off light. Me thinking again, " Oh god he is even more beautiful naked" Him thinking (still dunno and dont care lol ) I remember watching his lovely head disappear between my thighs ahhhhhhh Me thinking , "Oh shit ! what was I doing?" . I'd just had a micro nap and woken back up with a fright So his licking was either really good that it sent me off somewhere, or it was like tucking my hair behind my ear cos that shit sends me to sleep too
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RHP User
15 years ago
I have VERY snesitive skin and a simple gentle caress will get me giggling everytime...and if you keep it up then I am likely to put my clothes on and walk out...as I said sensitive skin and I HATE being tickled... , Kisses Focus
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'focusliason' I have VERY snesitive skin and a simple gentle caress will get me giggling everytime...and if you keep it up then I am likely to put my clothes on and walk out...as I said sensitive skin and I HATE being tickled... , Kisses FocusAll rough stuff for you then no tickly schmickely
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RHP User
15 years ago
Micro sleep? LOL Chilli should cut and paste hers off the other thread coz it is so damn good
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RHP User
15 years ago
Yeah you know, when you nod off for a little bit
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RHP User
15 years ago
I 'scored' at a pub in NZ VERY late one Friday night , coz I impressed her by beating everyone at pool (yeah whatever , that's what I told myself , goddam I was DA MAN , nothing to do with her being smashed and horny as). Went back to her place , got into the groping and toungue-wrestling ; oh yeah I was on fire biatches , she opened her gorgeous legs , knees up and naked baby , I leaned in , just about to insert Action Jackson and totally satisfy another hot little conquest , when out came the beginnings of a snore , and then alot more of a snore , and then a whole f__king symphony , it was my worst night-mare ; a full-fledged Macro Sleep , I was so stunned I just remember climbing off her and slumping into the bed , not bloody happy John , Jan whatever. Woke up in the morning , she was STILL lying with her knees up and legs wide open , and snoring exactly the same. I won't ask the boys of Rhp what they would then have done then , coz I'd prefer if some of you still get some pussy , don't shoot yourselves in the foot by saying anything stupid now ;) Loz
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RHP User
15 years ago
At least I woke up for the rest of mine
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RHP User
15 years ago
There is a thread running concurrently here and I was a bit concerned that, at times, you just couldn't quite get across the line... | Quoting 'dontgothere' I'd just had a micro nap ... | Just a thought, but it might help if you... | ...didn't snore until "after".
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'ChasingMidnight' There is a thread running concurrently here and I was a bit concerned that, at times, you just couldn't quite get across the line... | Quoting 'dontgothere' I'd just had a micro nap ... | Just a thought, but it might help if you... | ...didn't snore until "after". Never fear CM, as I said I did wake up almost instantly and was more than aware for the main event to begin I do enjoy a good show
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RHP User
15 years ago
I usually sleep right through the trailers at the movies too... | Quoting 'dontgothere' I do enjoy a good show... | Just be careful while you are snoozing the usher might just come along. You know the one...the guy with the funny looking flashlight and in charge of the silk ropes. Don't worry, if he knows what he is doing you will really enjoy being the coming attraction... | ...at the end of the show. | | Don't think about the feel of silk ropes against your skin...good little girls don't go there.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'dontgothere' seeing how you already told one of my clumsy bum tales in your OP I have to come up with some new material dont I . Ok now this isn't a proud moment either, but it's something I giggle about now that I can. Now picture this, a long night, a few champagnes, one super HOT young dark haired creature, who just happened to be looking at me with that same hungry look in his eye, (thankgod lol) Me thinking, "Oh man am I gonna eat you alive when I get you alone" Him thinking, (dunno didn't really care either pmsl) Finally get alone, hot steamy scene ensues with clothing flying everywhere and being ripped down off legs at the speed off light. Me thinking again, " Oh god he is even more beautiful naked" Him thinking (still dunno and dont care lol ) I remember watching his lovely head disappear between my thighs ahhhhhhh Me thinking , "Oh shit ! what was I doing?" . I'd just had a micro nap and woken back up with a fright So his licking was either really good that it sent me off somewhere, or it was like tucking my hair behind my ear cos that shit sends me to sleep too LMFAO! oMG....thankyou for sharing I almost fell off meh chair reading that, and no, I wasn't having sex!! Hahaha! Luv it :)
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RHP User
15 years ago
Oh yes ! Yes! Oh god yes Phillip...I mean James...everything stops in slow motion and he looks at you....you give a sweet apologetic look, and turns around and says...OH your so gonna get now!! hehe ... Oh and did I ever...so very hot. Just lucky to have been with a humorous man who didn't take it to heart....we both had a laugh about it after.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'alihummingly' Quoting 'dontgothere' LMFAO! oMG....thankyou for sharing I almost fell off meh chair reading that, and no, I wasn't having sex!! Hahaha! Luv it :) LOL no problems, I even entertain myself sometimes
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RHP User
15 years ago
oh now that made me think of something i had done..... but of course id try to blame him...in the missionary position having fun as you do ;) and he said turn around and ill fuvk you doggy style..... so me getting all excited ( coz doggy is one of my fav positions) i was keen to hurry up and get it like i wanted... moved my leg to awing it round to get up on all 4's and WHACK..... my heel got him on the face and then he seen red.... he wasnt angry... the red was blood from his nose i almost cleaned right off his face.... needless to say i didnt get to finish that night and it wasnt til the next morning we had a huge chuckle over it when his matees asked how he got the bruise and y his nose was swollen ive also put holes in walls, kneed him in the "netherregion" and broken a futon couch/bed" and guess what.... we r still together
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RHP User
15 years ago
Farts, whether they be fanny or bum, are always hilarious.The funniest thing that happened to me was when I'd met this guy at a pub to watch State of Origin. The blues actually won (and the series giving you an idea of how long ago this was) and the beer had been flowing freely. As tends to happen with me, the more booze I have, the hornier I get, so the game finished and we went out to his ute in the car park at the back of the pub. It was lateish by then and no patrons left, just the staff inside, so we were going at it hot and heavy. I had my socks and a jumper on still (it was cold outside, and he had pants on and a shirt (gus are so lucky). Anyway, we're going for it on the bonnet and finish and go to get back in to re-dress, and realise that he'd locked the keys in the car! At about this time the staff had locked up the pub and were leaving. As a regular at this pub the guy was absolutely mortified. I thought it was hilarious. He ended up smashing the side window (one of those utes that had the little triangle window - remember those?) to get us back in.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Polar_Bear_Girl'Anyway, we're going for it on the bonnet and finish and go to get back in to re-dress, and realise that he'd locked the keys in the car! At about this time the staff had locked up the pub and were leaving. As a regular at this pub the guy was absolutely mortified. I thought it was hilarious. He ended up smashing the side window (one of those utes that had the little triangle window - remember those?) to get us back in. Hilarious! Between this story and the one someone else was telling recently in another thread- about getting locked out of their hotel room wearing nothing but their sexy garments- I am now going to be ever aware of the location of my keys. Maybe the distraction of wondering where my keys are at will even add a extra few minutes to my game! hahaha
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RHP User
15 years ago
When you take a peek down between your thighs expecting to see the top of the head that contains the tongue that's hard at work but instead you see the intense (and quite obviously learned from watching lots of porn) fake-as porn star eyes staring back at you. I once had the ex stalk away pouting 'cos i had a laughing fit that just wouldn't stop, the pouting only made me laugh harder.xx Sarah
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RHP User
15 years ago
Now....hmm......that would have to be the startled (deer in the spotlights) look that would have been on my face when a gal pal from my distant past 'spurted' during oral......certainly caught my attention.....still makes me grin.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Sarah I crack up at the *insert deep voice here* very very serious cum face ,it's a killer. And I dont even really want to say it out loud, but the reason it cracks me up, is cos I always wonder if that's their poo face too . . jdex I bet its an eye opener the first time when you aren't expecting it
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RHP User
15 years ago
I just do little baby gushy things but one day, onnnne day, yep I'm planning on feeling every one of your emotions ^^ there
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RHP User
15 years ago
Oh well, I giggle when I’m horny, & have a habit of laughing when I’m cumming which can be embarrassing when they think I am laughing at them
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RHP User
15 years ago
when a girl's on top and then gushes all over me , wahoo that is amazingly hot. But I guess that yeah first time or unexpectedly for either party could be freaky. Loz
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RHP User
15 years ago
Probably looking for the coin slot for the ride
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RHP User
15 years ago
Did he later demand that you claw his back like the kitty did? Sick stuff :) Yeah I've had kittys getting all loud purry up in my man space and getting right up nuzzling our faces during missionary. Very funny stuff , we felt bad chucking her outside and closing the door , the cat that is. Thanks so much people , all of these have been so damned funny so far , please keep em cumming....
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RHP User
15 years ago
the dog licking their balls? Or just me? Or chacha? And remember this is NOT a beastiality site so you cannot admit on here that you enjoyed it. Just say yes or no or I'm not sure who it was and I guess I'll never know , or something
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RHP User
15 years ago
You're on your own there obviously . . My ex and I had been out one night, and came home all frisky so we were probably a bit more enthuisiastic than normal, and ended up having a kinky time......and by a kinky time I mean he'd obviously pulled out too far and gone for a big shove and hit my perineum (the little bit I call the ainter, cos it aint her bum and aint her fanny LOL ) on the way back in, "Oh shit! from me, Oh farrk from him", kinked it big time. anyway long story short, I must have gone down for a closer inspection in the morning But when I got really close, my head popped bolt upright, "WTF ??? this isn't right!" I was so worried about it because his cock was so purple it was almost black :O Thinking he would feel the same way, I was shocked when he jumped up and ran for a look in the mirror (for the full effect I can only gather lol ) and came out dancing it aroundthinking he was a black man for a day. He was so damn proud he couldn't wait to get back to work and take it for show and tell . . So a warning, kinky sex isn't always the good kind
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RHP User
15 years ago
Buns of steel and an ainter of steel to boot , he probably thought he was a hard man till then , just shows that women are harder , no bruises on you right? Where's my hammer , I wanna go answer some of those BBC wanting profiles.
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RHP User
15 years ago
i still giggle every time i think of this, my boyfriend and i had just moved in together and i woke up to be stabbed in the side with a rock hard cock, thinking he was trying to get me hot, i manuvered myself onto his pulsing hard-on, only to hear a sleepy voice say "stop jumping around......you're shaking the bed" followed by a long snore, and i realised my fella was sound asleep. i froze, not knowing what to do, sure it was not morally right to keep going while he was asleep.... my conscience lost the battle, and i shook him awake. needless to say, he really didnt complain too much
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RHP User
15 years ago
LOL yeah but I'm dying for someone to fuck me in my sleep........
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'AllNiteAllLucid' LOL yeah but I'm dying for someone to fuck me in my sleep........ You'd have to shut up and actually go to sleep first ;)I had many a night with the ex to find that we'd unconsciously gotten through all the foreplay and both woken up just in time to move on to the main event, neither of us complained but both of us swore every time it was the other who started it.xx Sarah
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RHP User
15 years ago
LOL Sarah I've got to let out all my pent up sexual frustration by talking right now , cum on weekend!!!!!!!!
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RHP User
15 years ago
Bahahahaha,gawd what a mood killer that could be! Cheers Nev
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RHP User
15 years ago
I didn't just fall off the bed, I flipped the bed (futon folded out) and both of us off with it. But I was on top then, which is what I wanted, so I should have just kept going she said. Instead I got very embarrassed because the housemates would have heard. Plus I'd heard another couple do exactly the same thing. But do you think I learned? That was the night I lost my v-plates too, so that was intercourse number 2.5 for Slippery. 2.5 because it didn't finish... well not in the correct way. Was just too embarrassed... . Same girl, tiny little thing, liked me to hold her arms down when I was on top. Well when she was on top once she tried to do the same thing... her tiny little arms just gingerly pressing down onto mine. It could've done all of the actual restraining of a couple of thin branches. I started laughing at her. She didn't mind that much though and we finished in the proper way that time. On a solid bed...
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RHP User
15 years ago
Hell
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