M46
Vow of Celibacy
December 28 2014
Comments
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RHP User
11 years ago
In the latter stages of my relationship there was no sex, and for a few of months after. The danger is, losing that sexual mojo. I couldnt care less if I had sex during that time. And when I met someone else, I felt like I was putting on a performance, there was no real pleasure in it for me. It took a while for me to actually want to have sex again, but once that came back, it was fantastic, and Im now like a kitten with a ball of wool, it never fails to excite me. A year is a long time, why not three months or even six? What if you meet someone who sweeps you off your feet, and they want to have sex and you explain that it aint happening for a year? Anyway, its your body, so good luck whatever you choose, but I cant imagine it would be doing your mind or body any favours? Unless its an extreme self discipline thing?
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Seachange73
11 years ago
I can hold my vows as long as I can until the next gorgeous man struts his hot stuff naked butt in front of me... So a week? have you seen the Seinfeld episode "master of his domain'? Hilarious!!! Oh dear Lord deliverth from all sexy evil.... Good luck.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Between voluntary and involuntary celibacy! Had to go to Bunnings and buy a wheelbarrow the other day :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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MissBishere
11 years ago
masterbation?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Sex just has been one big complication in my life. Recently met someone and have spent time cuddling. We have talked about sex, but I don't want to ruin it with sex. For me, I was considering going celibate until my divorce in June. I find once I take sex out of the equation it allows me to connect more with people. Yes, I have some serious issues I'm sorting out - BPD sufferer with significant dissociation due to intensity of my feelings. It is only lately after a lot of pysch work that I can actually feel an orgasm without dissociating due to it becoming too intense for me to handle. So I guess for me, taking sometime away from sex allows me to focus on connecting emotionally better with people - without the overwhelming intensity I can feel. Yes, I am jealous of others that can better manage their feelings and enjoy sex as part of a relationship - particularly my ex who has already shacked up with someone. But I'm finding life much more richer by making good friends and focusing on myself. Now all this could change with one inviting smile, but I go into it knowing there is an emotional connection first. I guess true love is something worth waiting for. And celibacy is one clear action stating you are waiting for something real - and no longer content with strangers passing in the night. If, however, you're doing it to attract interest by a woman to feel they are getting something special then well best of luck with that one.
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RHP User
11 years ago
And I'm about to complete my mission. 2013 was a little wild for me (and expensive) so I decided to abstain in 2014. 4 days to go. 2013 was all about exploring. 2014 was about my family and my career and well worth the time and energy. It has been difficult at times as my wild side means a lot to me. Emotionally, I have felt as though I'm half a person. Physically, my clitoris is about to explode. I think I need a NBO to get back into the swing of things ...
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Missb72' masterbation? Yes! No masturbation as well.
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RHP User
11 years ago
To answer your question: Never self imposed, no.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Who choose a spiritual path and embrace celibacy for life,or a shorter period of time...sexual energy is used in Tibetan Buddhist practices.for celibates and non celibates..It is transformative energy...I lived and worked in and around Buddhist Centres for twenty years..for much of this time I was celibate..but it was not a vow I took..I did take other vows however..I am not sure if celibacy chose me or I chose it 😌..xx Freya
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RHP User
11 years ago
I thank God I was raised a Catholic since sex will be better because it will always be dirty..John Waters 😜xx Freya
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RHP User
11 years ago
Well that counts me out ...
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RHP User
11 years ago
who I hadn't seen in over a year ... he seemed to have disappeared off the radar everywhere. Then we bumped into each other at a function. We had a great night socialising and afterwards went back to his place for coffee ... and he made it very clear it would ONLY be coffee ... I thought ... OK got it.*He meant it. It was only coffee. Told me after we broke up he decided to got celibate. Its been just over 12 months and says now that the time is up he just isnt into it anymore. He's lost his mojo. He also seems depressed and just lacks energy to get motivated to do anything. Perhaps there is more at play here than he is letting on. We now hang out as friends and I value his friendship even more because it is ONLY friendship.*Hope it works for you. LG
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RHP User
11 years ago
I think its an unhealthy expectation to not even take care of yourself.. I was celibate for 16 years while focusing on being a single mum. But I still took care of myself as I needed too..
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RHP User
11 years ago
Hi MM, Are you at a point in your life MM where you feel contented with yourself? Could your motivations be partly about being free from the distractions of emotional connections with others for further self-development? By no means do I wish to be confrontational with my questioning as I can only commend and support you for putting your prospective choice out there in the first place. Can I just take a quick moment to say hats of to you too OF_78 for sharing what you did, as I look forward to a time when that type of dialogue is more common place for the sake of all of our mental health. That's courage and you sound as though you are at a pretty good place with a lot of hard work already done man, thumbs up. It may be projection from my own circumstances prior Monsterousmind mind, in thinking that your choice could be from having it less about the physical and more so of the mental/emotional for yourself. It is felt though that by at least "putting it out there" and asking for feedback before your journey it is a great step. Is it a choice that you feel comfortable with? And is there a strategy for possibly encountering a great person along your path within that 12 month period? Would you feel comfortable, if a strong emotional connection with another person be established, letting them know of your decision and more so would there be great disappointment with the self should such a promise to one's self be in effect broken? Maybe if it were to occur, that you do meet someone, that it would be about them respecting your decisions and boundaries since it was a decision determined prior to their existence in your life. Don't wish to be too suggestive with scenarios as I feel that could be irresponsible of me. All I can really think to say is that I feel you are doing the right thing by analysing your own motivations and asking either of yourself or of others, hopefully trusted others. I have a male friend who has been celibate for some years (maybe ten now) as he feels self sufficient. He has had a couple of love-interests as it were, though with the doubt as to whether they were truly worthy of solid commitment, chose to leave sex out of it to therefore concentrate on determining compatibility with other areas. Masturbation is still something that he is comfortable with and I trust that he is not "closed off emotionally" and that choosing not to have sex with a woman isn't an example of this. I hope that all is of some benefit to you MM. If it feels right for you and you have trusted your instincts in other areas of your life with success then maybe that is all you can go on. Good on you man. Cheers, Nathan.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I wish I knew why paragraphs don't work in the forum posts?? Sorry about that monolith of text MM, I try with paragraphs but after clicking submit it all comes out as one lot. Any hints Freya? Cheers.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Ladyshai' I think its an unhealthy expectation to not even take care of yourself.. I was celibate for 16 years while focusing on being a single mum. But I still took care of myself as I needed too.. I did 16 months solo...
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RHP User
11 years ago
you're gunna have some serious blue balls OP.
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Seachange73
11 years ago
Quoting 'Freya79' I thank God I was raised a Catholic since sex will be better because it will always be dirty..John Waters 😜xx Freya Hahaha. Thanks. soooo true...
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RHP User
11 years ago
Haven't done and can't see any reason why I'd ever want the to Good luck with it all OP
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Justnat' I wish I knew why paragraphs don't work in the forum posts?? Sorry about that monolith of text MM, I try with paragraphs but after clicking submit it all comes out as one lot. I have the same problem so have started putting an * between paragraphs. LG
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RHP User
11 years ago
Meeks has the answer xx Freya
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RHP User
11 years ago
Meeka
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RHP User
11 years ago
I have tried, and failed. Temptation is too much for me.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'MON5TEROUSmind'Quoting 'Missb72'masterbation?Yes! No masturbation as well.Have you heard of the acronym for goal-setting 'SMART', OP aka MM? The letters stand for specific, measurable, attainable, realistic & timely. My concerns relate to the letters ART, and about the masturbation side of things specifically. It's (comparatively) easy to abstain from sex acts with another person because "it takes two to tango" and requires significant effort. You'd have to go out of your way to find a suitable partner and participate in the action. Masturbation is a related but very different activity. It requires no-one else, no special equipment or effort. Men without erectile dysfunctions frequently get erections without any conscious effort or deliberate mental stimulation, and the hand naturally hangs at genital height from standing, folds into the lap when seated. Someone who is trying to give up smoking might make sure they don't have cigarettes and lighters in their house. They can still fall off the wagon, but they have to physically go and buy the cigarettes from an open store, first. Whereas all someone trying to abstain from masturbation has to do in order to fall off the wagon is reach down and... Attainable goals are most often ones that have been worked towards. Smaller, previous successes often lay the foundation for future successes. Have you gone one month without masturbating in the past? A year is made up of 12 months. Someone who achieves their goal for one month is more likely to be able to do three months than someone who has never done even one month, and who initially aims for three. If I were a painter, I'd (hopefully) only set myself the goal of painting six portraits in one year if the year before I'd done three-and-a-half. The goal is still stretching me, doubling my output would be hard work! But I'd have better odds at success. Realistic: self-explanatory... Timely: One year is a long time. If reached, I'm sure the feeling of satisfaction would be immense. Still, it's difficult to work towards an all-or-nothing goal over such a long stretch of time. Humans tend to do better at tasks when given frequent rewards for their effort. Unless you were to structure some way to experience the reward for the abstinence more frequently, the distant goal up to 365 days away could be too distant to effectively motivate you to work towards. Some people experience more motivation to work towards shorter, conceivable deadlines. Linking in to the thoughts above. If you have your heart set on one year, at the very least you could psychologically break that year into more manageable chunks (fortnights?) and have some kind of reward to track your progress. It could be as simple as putting a marble in a jar every second Friday, or whatever. That way you have a not-so-distant goal to work towards, and have a tangible (visual and tactile) way of tracking progress. As the marbles accumulate, traction for the goal would likely grow from "the snowball effect".
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Justnat' Hi MM, Are you at a point in your life MM where you feel contented with yourself? Could your motivations be partly about being free from the distractions of emotional connections with others for further self-development? By no means do I wish to be confrontational with my questioning as I can only commend and support you for putting your prospective choice out there in the first place. Can I just take a quick moment to say hats of to you too OF_78 for sharing what you did, as I look forward to a time when that type of dialogue is more common place for the sake of all of our mental health. That's courage and you sound as though you are at a pretty good place with a lot of hard work already done man, thumbs up. It may be projection from my own circumstances prior Monsterousmind mind, in thinking that your choice could be from having it less about the physical and more so of the mental/emotional for yourself. It is felt though that by at least "putting it out there" and asking for feedback before your journey it is a great step. Is it a choice that you feel comfortable with? And is there a strategy for possibly encountering a great person along your path within that 12 month period? Would you feel comfortable, if a strong emotional connection with another person be established, letting them know of your decision and more so would there be great disappointment with the self should such a promise to one's self be in effect broken? Maybe if it were to occur, that you do meet someone, that it would be about them respecting your decisions and boundaries since it was a decision determined prior to their existence in your life. Don't wish to be too suggestive with scenarios as I feel that could be irresponsible of me. All I can really think to say is that I feel you are doing the right thing by analysing your own motivations and asking either of yourself or of others, hopefully trusted others. I have a male friend who has been celibate for some years (maybe ten now) as he feels self sufficient. He has had a couple of love-interests as it were, though with the doubt as to whether they were truly worthy of solid commitment, chose to leave sex out of it to therefore concentrate on determining compatibility with other areas. Masturbation is still something that he is comfortable with and I trust that he is not "closed off emotionally" and that choosing not to have sex with a woman isn't an example of this. I hope that all is of some benefit to you MM. If it feels right for you and you have trusted your instincts in other areas of your life with success then maybe that is all you can go on. Good on you man. Cheers, Nathan. Good advice :) Thanks mate! Its not about my existence. Its more like I have disassociated intimacy from sex and I think its because I am having too much. I think restraint might help. :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'slippery_halo' Quoting 'MON5TEROUSmind'Quoting 'Missb72'masterbation?Yes! No masturbation as well.Have you heard of the acronym for goal-setting 'SMART', OP aka MM? The letters stand for specific, measurable, attainable, realistic & timely. My concerns relate to the letters ART, and about the masturbation side of things specifically. It's (comparatively) easy to abstain from sex acts with another person because "it takes two to tango" and requires significant effort. You'd have to go out of your way to find a suitable partner and participate in the action. Masturbation is a related but very different activity. It requires no-one else, no special equipment or effort. Men without erectile dysfunctions frequently get erections without any conscious effort or deliberate mental stimulation, and the hand naturally hangs at genital height from standing, folds into the lap when seated. Someone who is trying to give up smoking might make sure they don't have cigarettes and lighters in their house. They can still fall off the wagon, but they have to physically go and buy the cigarettes from an open store, first. Whereas all someone trying to abstain from masturbation has to do in order to fall off the wagon is reach down and... Attainable goals are most often ones that have been worked towards. Smaller, previous successes often lay the foundation for future successes. Have you gone one month without masturbating in the past? A year is made up of 12 months. Someone who achieves their goal for one month is more likely to be able to do three months than someone who has never done even one month, and who initially aims for three. If I were a painter, I'd (hopefully) only set myself the goal of painting six portraits in one year if the year before I'd done three-and-a-half. The goal is still stretching me, doubling my output would be hard work! But I'd have better odds at success. Realistic: self-explanatory... Timely: One year is a long time. If reached, I'm sure the feeling of satisfaction would be immense. Still, it's difficult to work towards an all-or-nothing goal over such a long stretch of time. Humans tend to do better at tasks when given frequent rewards for their effort. Unless you were to structure some way to experience the reward for the abstinence more frequently, the distant goal up to 365 days away could be too distant to effectively motivate you to work towards. Some people experience more motivation to work towards shorter, conceivable deadlines. Linking in to the thoughts above. If you have your heart set on one year, at the very least you could psychologically break that year into more manageable chunks (fortnights?) and have some kind of reward to track your progress. It could be as simple as putting a marble in a jar every second Friday, or whatever. That way you have a not-so-distant goal to work towards, and have a tangible (visual and tactile) way of tracking progress. As the marbles accumulate, traction for the goal would likely grow from "the snowball effect". This wont work with me :) i do this for living .... lol... :) I cant help my self, I am more complex than this. Think of me as a perfect escape artist for emotions and logic :) Rebel ultimate :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Freya79' Meeks has the answer xx FreyaBUT I CANT SEE WHO MEEKA IS lol... Sorry but cant associate thoughts to people I cane see the face of :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Since everyone is except for a few people, are going off tangent and giving me exactly what i DID NOT ask for, here is the reason why I am planning to do it..... I have been having too much sex, and now I cannot associate intimacy with sex anymore... I think because I can get it easy, i don't make enough effort to put into a relationship. I think we I cut off sex I might be able to focus on intimacy and feelings and mutual mental understanding in a relationship. Now I am planning to do it with a caviar that if I find a girl that I really find that I can have a potential relationship with I might finish it. :) and I mean seriously... like someone I really feel like we have relationship potential and trust me when it comes to assessment of relationship I am very logical and analyse on a very broad horizon ;) Hopefully now I can have something useful :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Someone a bit... fishy?! lol
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MissBishere
11 years ago
cock and ball torture to me😁😁
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'MON5TEROUSmind' Since everyone is except for a few people, are going off tangent and giving me exactly what i DID NOT ask for, here is the reason why I am planning to do it..... / /Hopefully now I can have something useful :) It's free advice/commentary, MM. As far as conversations in the RHP forum go, I reckon you actually got better than average responses so far. As it happens I do have some personal experience with your stated goal, that could be useful for what you initially asked in the OP. Now I know that you're a rebel and the conventional wisdom that works for the plebs isn't going to cut the mustard, I'm going to have to develop a personalised action plan for you to succeed in your goal of not fucking anyone else, and certainly not going and fucking yourself. My initial consultation is free but the advanced stuff is fee per service. As a consultant yourself, I'm sure you'll find my fee very modest and my package comprehensive.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'slippery_halo' Quoting 'MON5TEROUSmind' Since everyone is except for a few people, are going off tangent and giving me exactly what i DID NOT ask for, here is the reason why I am planning to do it..... / /Hopefully now I can have something useful :) It's free advice/commentary, MM. As far as conversations in the RHP forum go, I reckon you actually got better than average responses so far. As it happens I do have some personal experience with your stated goal, that could be useful for what you initially asked in the OP. Now I know that you're a rebel and the conventional wisdom that works for the plebs isn't going to cut the mustard, I'm going to have to develop a personalised action plan for you to succeed in your goal of not fucking anyone else, and certainly not going and fucking yourself. My initial consultation is free but the advanced stuff is fee per service. As a consultant yourself, I'm sure you'll find my fee very modest and my package comprehensive. Love IT! You fuckin crack me up :P hahhaha Good one mate :) Love your comments :)
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MissBishere
11 years ago
that celibacy will fix your problem. Sounds more like a personality disorder. And you're awfully bossy!
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RHP User
11 years ago
I totally get celibacy, having been there myself but for very different reasons to yours. But for your prostrate health I would seriously recommend not including masturbation in the equation. Do some research before hand....no pun intended :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
The OP is sincere in his intentions..It might be difficult for people on a so called sex site to believe ..But if we are to develop an understanding of self sometimes we just need to stop and reflect..So kudos to you OP xx Freya
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Missb72' that celibacy will fix your problem. Sounds more like a personality disorder. And you're awfully bossy! Guilty as charged! I am pretty bossy :) cant change it now :) Its kinda embedded now :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'norcuck' I totally get celibacy, having been there myself but for very different reasons to yours. But for your prostrate health I would seriously recommend not including masturbation in the equation. Do some research before hand....no pun intended :) Good advice mate! Appreciate your concern :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Freya79' The OP is sincere in his intentions..It might be difficult for people on a so called sex site to believe ..But if we are to develop an understanding of self sometimes we just need to stop and reflect..So kudos to you OP xx Freya Thanks for the support!The rationale is that due to my rebellious nature the more I get challenged the more I get stronger in my resolve so let them keep it coming :) I am LOVING IT :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Justnat' I wish I knew why paragraphs don't work in the forum posts?? Sorry about that monolith of text MM, I try with paragraphs but after clicking submit it all comes out as one lot. Type after a sentence(<br>)and you will start a new line. Type after after a sentence(<br>)(<br>) and you will start a new paragraph. Apparently typing (<p>) underneath a line will start a new paragraph too, but it doesn't seem to work for me. Hope this helps.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'MON5TEROUSmind'BUT I CANT SEE WHO MEEKA IS lol... Sorry but cant associate thoughts to people I cane see the face of :) Says the pot with a drawing for a profile pic (that looks nothing like him)?
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RHP User
11 years ago
In the last year of my marriage there was no sexual interaction so yeah I guess I have done this! All be it not voluntarily but one thing I never lost was the Mojo - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
November 2013 is said enough sex and stopped cold turkey. 2014 was a year that I began with the express goal of not having any sex. The reason was simply to avoid distraction from more important goals. The year before I found that my studies were suffering as I had sex as my highest priority. So I deliberately said no to sex. It was going to be just half the year, but mid year I found that I did not need it so just keep at it. As with all things, once you get into the swing of it, its easy to go without. There were some moments where temptation was knocking and if my situation was a little different I could have given in. During that time I was still going to the local swinger club regularly, only because I had friends there and I liked the social aspect. It was not a problem at all, though I dd avoid some people. But I did it and i am proud of being able to do it. Starting up again was a little bit difficult, but that's out of the way and my confidence is back, which was the most surprising aspect for me. I thought I would be keen to get back to having sex, but I really had to force my self to get out and get some. Good luck OP, once you get over the first week the rest is easy...
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RHP User
11 years ago
NO way
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RHP User
11 years ago
That is the best thing you've said all year. Ditto.
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
A liver detox. All that effort and then you go fuck it again. Pun intended. Why stop? You end up exactly where you left off after a few sessions back on it........ you dont need to stop, you need quality and moderation. Sigh......
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RHP User
11 years ago
I posted what I was doing way back in March, so I thought I would look it up. Got to love the forums for remembering all. I had put the date that I started, well not the date but the days I was counting. So the last sex I had before the weekend was exactly 1 year and 3 days. You can do anything if you set your mind to it. Sorry but I pity you poor mortals LOL
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RHP User
11 years ago
Sometimes you need to get priorities in the right place and that means there is no room for frivolous pursuits. There is also the Need to prove something to ones self, you know some people climb mountains, some swim across oceans. Not having sex for a year is easy, no danger, apart from sanity. I had to climb that mole hill as it was becoming an addiction. An Addiction is something that negatively impacts ones life, and i am not going to piss hundreds of thousands of dollars to the wind just because my dick likes being sucked.
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Heavens. Just ask. I'll suck your dick for free...........
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
If you have that much cash to splash, dinner first. Maybe a drink as well........
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RHP User
11 years ago
Very kind, but the issues is not about getting sex or paying for it, it seamed to be on tap and free. Dont feel sorry for me, it was what I needed, it was not forced on me and once I had settled in the mind set, it was easy. But that is now history and have gained a little temperance and confidence that I can say no, and learnt that being alone is not all that bad when you occupy the mind. i got so many things done over the year. But sex is still fun, as long as I balance it with the rest of my life. mmmm so do you deep throat..
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RHP User
11 years ago
Oh you miss understand. I am talking about the cost of study and the growing hex debt, and the income I could be getting if I had kept my business going. If I stuff up and don't get my degrees all that time, debt, and lost income would be a total waste. As a student I am dirt poor. If I had money I would not have cared one bit and would have happily fucked my way through the degrees.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Missb72' that celibacy will fix your problem. Sounds more like a personality disorder. And you're awfully bossy! Yes I am :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' Quoting 'MON5TEROUSmind'BUT I CANT SEE WHO MEEKA IS lol... Sorry but cant associate thoughts to people I cane see the face of :) Says the pot with a drawing for a profile pic (that looks nothing like him)? The drawing is very accurate representation of my face ;) If I do something I do it good :) Its a self portrait :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Blindman67' November 2013 is said enough sex and stopped cold turkey. 2014 was a year that I began with the express goal of not having any sex. The reason was simply to avoid distraction from more important goals. The year before I found that my studies were suffering as I had sex as my highest priority. So I deliberately said no to sex. It was going to be just half the year, but mid year I found that I did not need it so just keep at it. As with all things, once you get into the swing of it, its easy to go without. There were some moments where temptation was knocking and if my situation was a little different I could have given in. During that time I was still going to the local swinger club regularly, only because I had friends there and I liked the social aspect. It was not a problem at all, though I dd avoid some people. But I did it and i am proud of being able to do it. Starting up again was a little bit difficult, but that's out of the way and my confidence is back, which was the most surprising aspect for me. I thought I would be keen to get back to having sex, but I really had to force my self to get out and get some. Good luck OP, once you get over the first week the rest is easy... thanks for the support mate! appreciate it!
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'anywhichway007' If you have that much cash to splash, dinner first. Maybe a drink as well........ FFS Stop picking up on my post you sexy minx :P lol...
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RHP User
11 years ago
I am doing it.. For Three months with a roll over on a quarterly basis with a possibility to go for a year.... :) The inspirational target is a year... :) Lets see how I go I will keep posting in forums about how I am going :) Join the support crew... hahaha GO CELIBATE !!! YAY!!!! NOTE: You can Bitch about it BUT I am still going to do it :)
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MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
I'll join you OP...we can be support buddies?? I can try.. Lolz Foxy
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'SuperFoxxxy' I'll join you OP...we can be support buddies?? I can try.. Lolz Foxy lol... u sexy minx :) I am dead serious about it :D
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RHP User
11 years ago
I completely understand the problem of having sex so high on ones value system but for the life of me I do not understand how you could even want to change such a nice thing ? personally I have come to learn for me the best way to be happy and successful in every aspect of my life is to set my goals all in line with my true hierarchy of priority. so when sex is so high on my list due to both hormonal/physical and physiological/mental desire for it. what i need to do is to find away to make my "goals" inline with that.. now again everyones different.. an eazy way to explain this is there arnt too many people that you will meet that would truly say they dont want to get be wealthy or rich etc when they are young .. however how many of them actually have that as a priority and think about it every morning when they wake up and do take a few actions to go to wards that goal when young !! well only the few that who actually make it there, reason being that while they want to be very rich etc etc their real top 3 priorities are not really that so in order for them to actually make that goal come true they need to link their top 3 priority into a way to monetize it if they want to introduce a goal that is not as high .. "this could be the business coach in me talking" but unless you are practicing for typical marriage life "no offense intended" i don't really see any true value in going through that in a short gift of life we have :-) enjoy your moments and your life how you want to without trying to force and inject others top values into yours..
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RHP User
11 years ago
Just get married.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Well... a month and a half on this morning on Valentine's day, I was thinking what has changed since I dropped off sex... mmm.... My alcohol intake is increased, but so is my exercise regime. I have thought about a couple of new business ideas one of which seem like a workable solution. I have more time to get "stuff" done. Work hours have increased. On the other side, my body is behaving differently for being deprived of sex... lol.. not used to it through almost half of my age. My emotional side is pretty strange at the moment. I am definitely lonelier than before but I guess I am not band aiding my loneliness with meaning less sex so it is a very stable kind of on going loneliness :) The first few days were hard, but I have sort of come to terms with it. Sometimes I feel like I have accepted my self to be a looser but then who am I to judge myself for thinking if I give up sex I am a looser hahaha... Well... the journey continues and I am still single.. lol... lets see how it goes. Happy valentines day to everyone :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
I did wonder how this journey was going for you..loneliness becomes solitude..In my experience...sexual energy can be utilised to fuel other things.as you have discovered...the quest for intimacy rather than just the physical is a brave one xxFreya
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RHP User
11 years ago
Sending a Valentines Day purely platonic hug : )
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RHP User
11 years ago
We could sit around and do some art. Like you I have put my pink bits into the back burner for a while. However I do go on web cam now and gain, just to feel like I am desired , and keep in touch with that part of myself. Yes you do more, I have been drawing more, but I still get distracted by Rhp, I know it would be better if I was not on here, its like working in a chocolate shop when your on a diet. I know how insular you can become. It would be nice to be in bed with a person and sex did not have to be the cost of a snuggle, but that's life at the sharp end, and as you say if you cant have what you want then why just offer up the shell to get some connection with another person. here is a valentine from one artist to another. xxxx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Do NOT shake that mans hand. You ARE right handed... I assume....lol
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