F109
Unromantic Valentine Poetry
February 12 2011
Comments
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RHP User
15 years ago
Two woman chatting about their valentine's nights. The one said how her night was the best from her new man. He took her to a romantic, expensive restaurant...where they had the best food, most expensive champagne, lots of conversation and laughter. After dinner, he had booked the most expensive penthouse in the hotel, where they had 2 hours of the best foreplay, then 2 hours of fabulous love making...afterwards, he didnt even fall asleep..he talked for another 2 hours. It was the best night ever she told her friend. The other woman told her how her valentines night was the worst ever. He came over with a pizza and a bottle of scotch,watched the football, got drunk, fucked me...and then passed out. Now the two guys chatting... The first one told his mate how she had booked an expensive restaurant...he saw the prices so high and shit himself cos it was so expensive. Then she had booked such an expensive room. It took me 2 hours to get it up, i couldnt stop thinking how i was i supposed to pay for all this. And it took me 2 hours to cum cos my mind was on how the fuck was i going to pay for this fuckin night! And then it took me ages to fall asleep... The other guy said 'you poor bastard'! Mine was the best valentines ever. I drank a bottle of scotch, had a pizza, watched the footy..had sex, and fell asleep. I feel great today...
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RHP User
15 years ago
Tis Valentine's day and the Roses are Red... the bigger the bunch, the more chance of getting head... Tis Valentine's day and the Violets are Blue... so please hand over those Chocolates or your balls will be the same hue...
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RHP User
15 years ago
I thought that I could love no other that is, until i met your brother :)
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RHP User
15 years ago
my love is so strong dear, it never shall pass, now bend over baby, and show me that ass. your smile is so radiant, my heart skips a beat, now get down on your knees bitch, and suck on my meat.
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RHP User
15 years ago
roses are red apples are sour your elbow's on my hair and you really need a shower
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magsluvsoral
15 years ago
roses are red.pickles are green.i like your legs.and what's in between.
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RHP User
15 years ago
your heart is the warmest, by a long country mile. now please let me in, disappearin' cock style.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Love your work newgirl. Excellent MWAH
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RHP User
15 years ago
Oh lots of giggles that cock sounds familiar Theone lmao . . Violets are fun, but the roses are dead. If you dont make me cum You wont be gettin head .
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RHP User
15 years ago
I like them in the rainI like them in sunshineI like them after whisky I like them after wineI like them when they ignore meAnd I like them when they whineI like them in the darkI like them in the lightI like them in the dayI like them in the nightI like them from the leftAnd I like them from the rightI like them in the winter I like them in the springI like them if they’re dowdyI like them if they’re blingI like them if they’re distantAnd I like them if they clingI like them fragrantI like them artyI like them demureI like them tartyI like them homespunAnd I like them at a partyI like them smallI like them pertI like them in shortsI like them in a skirtI like them coyAnd I like them when they flirtI like them bigI like them smallI like them shortI like them tallBut I like them willingMost of all| Happy Valentine's Day to all the ladies! I just hope you all get... | ...what I want!
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RHP User
15 years ago
You guys are great..... So much poetic talent...............my style lol Love it xxx
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'dontgothere' Oh lots of giggles that cock sounds familiar Theone lmao . . Violets are fun, but the roses are dead. If you dont make me cum You wont be gettin head . hahahahahahahaha adore all the poetry heads .... I am not going to even attempt compiling a ditty, I am crap at that!!!! You all made me laugh very hard...........More More More!!! xxx
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RHP User
15 years ago
Just for you then, I'll knock up another one LOL . . . One ,two...Valentines for two Three,four.....with your knees on the floor Five,six....bring on the licks Seven, eight.....but you said you were straight Nine, ten.....Oh alright, go on then !!!! . its Valentines after all.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Nice one CM
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RHP User
15 years ago
‘twas the day after Valentine’s, And deep in my pants My poor little ball-sack Was covered in ants. We’d gone on a picnic On Valentine’s day, And sat on the grass Overlooking the lake Slowly she stripped, It revealed such a sight. I knew I’d be getting So lucky that night. Our passions ignited The flames of desire My member had hardened, It stood like a spire. She reached for the honey, I lay on my back, She drizzled it over My cock and my sack. Licking and sucking, She cleaned off my shaft. But my poor little ball-sack Hid in the long grass. Sated, I lay in the grass on my back. And failed to notice The things on my sack. So now it’s the 15th, The memory’s strong Of the Valentine’s snog-fest That went horribly wrong.
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RHP User
15 years ago
I did try and as usual....it was long but this time not deep. | Sometimes it's hard for me to keep it simple or is that...simple to keep it hard? I am so confused after that thread about the reasons hot chicks hate cum I am almost ready to give up on this forum. | But then again, simplicity... | To err is human To forgive is devine | I think I will just stop right there...I need a third line that's a little bit clever and the last word has to rythm with "cock". | I am going to just stick to writing perverse and erotic fiction for that sleezy website that actually has women on it that do like cum. | ...cum hating virgins. Who needs them.
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RHP User
15 years ago
I found a little poem I submitted in the Valentine's post from last year... The roses are withered, the violets have died... Oh, when will I get laid!, God knows I've tried... Messages, Flirts,and flashing my rack... but what do I get, a polite knockback... "No thank you ma'am, you live too far away, for it's in front of my computer screen that I like to play" So, stick your bloody flowers and hand me the chocs... and my trusty Doc Johnson to get my rocks off!!!
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RHP User
15 years ago
rcflyer thats a corker . . caitsidhe love it to death CM let me finish it for you . . . To err is human to forgive is divine To be part of his flock you need to suck ..... sing it with me CM .....cock!!!!!!
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RHP User
15 years ago
Ashes to ashes Dust to dust If it weren't for women Men's ding dongs would rust VB
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'dontgothere' CM let me finish it for you | Oh look...I forgot the lyrics already, but if we laid side by side and just hummed the tune together I am sure I would be happy to go there with you. Forget this don't go there stuff...we would be gone! | ...and gentleman that I am, you would finish this song first.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Roses r red, poems r corny,take me to bed cause I'm feeling horny. When roses r red they need 2 be plucked, and next time I see u, ur gunna get fucked! U're so sexy u drive me insane, when ur not around I feel so much pain.Ure sexy voice puts me in a slumber, oh fuck no!..... sorry wrong number. xxx
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RHP User
15 years ago
Its valentines morn you wake with horn. And like most folk you give it a stroke. Is she awake? a chance you will take. You poke it in her back will she push back? Go for the test and reach for her breast. Should she give a moan You know that you're home. . . or................. She'll turn round and say, what the f#^*! are you waking me up for !!!! . . heeheee
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RHP User
15 years ago
mt syle of poetry lol
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