F47
Should foul language, names calling and bad manners be allowed in the Forums?!?
February 16 2014
Comments
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sweetgem
12 years ago
Write "in the Forums???" as the ending of the thread title! Somehow it got modified by the Admin team to read as "in the..."!!! Hmmmmmmmmmmmm......... - Posted from rhpmobile
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gazpacho
12 years ago
I understand what you're saying, however, we're not exactly in Church here are we? there are plenty of abrupt expressions used colloquially in the English language and for the most part, no word you ever read here is going to be a word not heard screamed in the throws of sexual passion from a bedroom on a 6th floor window. All that aside, I give you liberty to substitute in your mind any word that I use, which would offend you. I know you can do it. You seem pretty smart. As for bitching and moaning, well, i can do without that too, but sometimes I get out of sorts with my naturally peaceful inner harmony, for which I am very sorry. HugsGazpacho
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RHP User
12 years ago
If I see derogatory comments , I tend to ignore them . If we all ignore them , they'll go away . There's no point amplifying the problem by responding to it . And considering that this is an Adult meeting Site , carrying on like a Mullet isn't going to win favours . I saw that "bitches" post and I thought to myself , good on you mate , you've succeeded in making yourself look quite Un-Attractive , which defeats the purpose of being on this Site ... GG♒️ - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Ok theres a time and a place... But I seriously love to swear LOL just drop the F bomb at that inopportune moment. I worked with a group of people and one day a male worker said to a female worker whilst I was standing there that she should be more like me ....(me) nevers swears!!......well female worker jaw drops she said are you serious? He said I have never heard her swear...well female worker is in histerics....after that I would just politely slip in the odd F word as we were crossing the road after work....nearly got the guy run over a few times it was precious to see the look on his face. May he R.I.P. Sometimes as I know the forums get a little heated and it is always hoped that it will remain friendly but this is a place where emotions and thoughts get all let out..hopefully things blow over and the dust settles.
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Plain280
12 years ago
A lot of the words and or names are in various dictionaries and surprise surprise are as we would use them in their definitions. It is in the context of how they are used which causes offence to people. Personally I try not to use them but for Fucks Sake gives us a break this is an adult site devoted to sex either in or out of attachments and marriage etc, so their is always going to be some argy bargy and written disagreements. Easy dont read it if it offends you, the hard part unless absolutely directed at you forget about it and move on. Next.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'MisterGreen' If I see derogatory comments , I tend to ignore them . If we all ignore them , they'll go away . There are certain posters I tend to ignore, because in my opinion they are not worth acknowledging anymore. But then there are certain remarks I don't believe should be disregarded. In my opinion not speaking out about heinous comments makes the rest of us part of the problem, as our silence can easily be interpreted as us condoning them.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Speaking out against*
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RHP User
12 years ago
You nailed it Mea.
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RHP User
12 years ago
In the extreme scenario you've mentioned (heinous comments) ,sure , none of us should tolerate that and we should speak up. But for all the trivial and snide remarks that some people make , it's just not worth my time engaging them . I'm here for Pleasure . I'm not interested in getting involved in piddling little catfights that some people try to instigate , just to draw attention to themselves . I always think it's such a shame to see great Threads turned into tatters by childish bickering and name-calling . GG♒️ - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'MisterGreen' In the extreme scenario you've mentioned (heinous comments) ,sure , none of us should tolerate that and we should speak up. But for all the trivial and snide remarks that some people make , it's just not worth my time engaging them . But you said "derogatory" before, and I do make the distinction between that and trivial.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I like saying words like cock, cunt (the body part, not a person), kinky fuckers, etc. I'm curious to hear if this is offensive language to you. Obviously I don't mean it to be, which I think goes for the majority.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Are you splitting hairs with me ? As for swear words in general , I think many of them have been successfully integrated into the English language. I'm aware of my ability to swear but I prefer to challenge myself by finding alternate words that can express the same meaning . But after a couple of drinks , I curse like a fucken Pirate ;) GG♒️ - Posted from rhpmobile
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sweetgem
12 years ago
Foul language to me is not necessarily the actual physical swearing words used. I have no problem with how people want to speak in general, I too swear when I have enough! But I dislike hearing/seeing people speak or write (in which case the Forums comments) rudely directly at certain person or a group of people. E.g. Calling other Forums posters "a bunch of bitches" is not just name calling, but also foul language used......to me anyway! Therefore, those words you mentioned above, as an examples, are NOT offensive to me, because they have no sense of directing at me as a Forums participant. Hope I have answered your question clearly, Meander? :-) No doubt, I will be fried on this topic by those who haven't met me in person. I would even not be surprised if my English language skills became an attacked target at some point! It's people's choice and I always respect that, even though I do not agree with, and that's totally two different things! :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Yes there is sexual language used but that does not mean that simple things like respect for for others should be thrown out the window....and I agree with Meander that if no one says anything then that gives people the idea that they can continue to do what they are doing. There was a thread recently about hair and shaving in the gym and basically one of the posters posted (in my opinion) homophobic comments and I called him on it. Yes, the thread got pulled soon after so I never got to hear what the response was.... Was I glad I said something, hell yes. Cheers, W. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'sweetgem' Hope I have answered your question clearly, Meander? :-)
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'MisterGreen' In the extreme scenario you've mentioned (heinous comments) ,sure , none of us should tolerate that and we should speak up. But for all the trivial and snide remarks that some people make , it's just not worth my time engaging them . I'm here for Pleasure . I'm not interested in getting involved in piddling little catfights that some people try to instigate , just to draw attention to themselves . I always think it's such a shame to see great Threads turned into tatters by childish bickering and name-calling . GG♒️ - Posted from rhpmobile I don't pay any attention to the bitching and carry-on. It isn't worth me investing any energy in that at all. Like Mr Green, I'm here for what RHP can add to my life, not for it to drain my time with negativity. There are things that irritate me, though Sweetgem. I just realised the thing that most irritates me is when people who I'd class as open-minded and clever (based only on their posts over time) say small-minded, judgmental, petty, superior, dismissive, bossy, condescending or similar things. That really gets my goat and at times I find it hard to (and at times fail to) just ignore. Still, I honestly think ignoring things is the best option. If people say stupid/mean/petty/whatever things, why even respond? Who are we all to adopt the role of sanctioning others for the way they behave here? And if we feel the need to sanction, why not just use one of the most effective strategies around and just point blank ignore people who behave badly? I don't believe we have an obligation to set others right for whatever it is we think they've done wrong. I believe our primary obligation is to not add fuel to any fire; not give unpleasant things any more energy than absolutely necessary. So ... again ... ignore :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
I met you, there you were surrounded by sweets. I just finished them off hp. Name calling well yes guilty, swearing, guilty,having a go,guilty. Your right I am a creature of moods, some days I should sit on my hands. And not tear someone's armhole , except for Mr Gas, cause he loves it so much.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Arsehole, the bloody ipad hates to Swear!
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sweetgem
12 years ago
Hahahahaha I can't stop laughing as I read your comments :-) You are a real gem in this Forums! Thank you for the laugh and your wisdom shared, as always! :-) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
I think it is all shits and giggles, it is just cyber world....right.
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Smilingwithfun
12 years ago
I find it sad that to use a cricket term, They play the man not the ball. Some seem to have a go at the person posting rather than the post. If you disagree with the post say so, don't start being derogatory to the person who posts.
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madotara69
12 years ago
A fine line between pleasure and pain. ( Divinyls and her name, RIP (no chance) Chrissy Amphlett, she wrote of her life too, called it.... Pleasure And Pain A song sung by a woman who spoke out, she made some differences for it too, Maniac with it all, did good things with it all. Could you type in to you tube, or similar; a song called....... Let The Cane Fields Burn..... Think there will only be a photo gallery to it, Graeme Connors? Please He is a fantastic story to song writer, that song just shows an example for things can go on around us, not privy we don't see the emotions, they can change people like wind dragging sand. Mado Tara xx If it feels you are doing the right thing, and sometimes there is no choice to address something if you have promises to people. It can stir up some dust, and as a rule I was once told to memorize this meaning. Unkind words and thoughtless snubs are but the echoes of small and frightened people. So the ones who are bitter with life, are the first to send it on, they are not so well themselves and it can just be messy.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Is the heated discussions and passionate arguments. It's when those debates/arguments detriorate to personal attacks and slights that ruins the intent of the original topic. I love the open adult discussions here, pubctuated at times by the occasional expletive or absurdity, take that away and what do we have left - another vanilla, heavily regulated, run of the mill site like EHarmony or something else equally prissy. We are all guilty of letting our halo's slip and our horns show.....though for the most part the regulars here and some of the newer posters generally exercise an acceptable level of decorum, restraint, tasteful exclusion, diplomacy and self-control. It's only the odd wanker/player/liar I'd like to see banned from the forums but at the end of the day that is out of my hands, your hands and anyone else' hands except the Mods. Tolerance, understanding and a liberal approach applies to the rest of us. ~ Indy (still waiting for priviledges to be returned, 😇 I promise I'll be good)
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RHP User
12 years ago
What I've noticed is that those that lost little nasty comments or direct comments are strong personality and I've also read with smiles :) that when the chips are down they all show a true respect with each other :) We all have down days we all have brain freeze days n we are all cheeky at times :)) Most of the regs here showed you honest support when u posted re being called a panda ??? I think ya sexy n hot is that wrong to say ?
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RHP User
12 years ago
Play the man so he doesn't play the ball is what cricket is all about. But just remember once your off the field the sit stops there. Everyone can & should say as they please and respect others to do the same.
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sweetgem
12 years ago
If everyone should say as they please, then why were the majority of the posters on that particular Forums Thread called "bitches" by this man in question, when their comments were actually made in response to another member's post, and not his?!? Contradicting I must say!!! Anyways, like the good RHPers said on my other Thread, that all these bad behaviours would actully help me filtering out the bad meats, and save me a lot of time on meeting the wrong people!!! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'sweetgem'all these bad behaviours would actully help me filtering out the bad meats, and save me a lot of time on meeting the wrong people!!! Like!
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RHP User
12 years ago
I think there is a very fine line. Being playful and calling someone a filthy fucker regarding a shared kink is different to saying, person A is a filthy fucker for being into xyz. As I've said before, often it's not what you say, but the way you say it/write it.
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rupamohan
12 years ago
Your best bet is to get amused at such posts, ignore or report. Preaching rarely work in modern times. Specially doesn't work here some regulars will tell you this simply because at times they have themselves abused forums. I do believe many abuser here have no personal agenda against individual. It is just a habit, may be some are ignorant of RHP policy or simply don't follow it strictly. Some regulars are too quick to reply before nerves settle down. We also believe forum users and active swingers are not a very common set of members. Impact of forum image on swinging potential is very limited. RHP guidelines covers much more then foul language. I guess even giving useless replies can be against the policy? We believe if a member is incapable of respecting RHP policy they don't deserve respect. However we still respect them simply because it is embarrassing for us not to respect others. *******************************************Regular forum users - Thanks for keeping forum alive and all the best with others. Please note reply to me is unwanted if it is useless and doesn't meet RHP policy. Such replies will make me hard to respect you!!!Others - Useless replies are welcomed too, to encourage diversity among forum users. Lurkers specially couples under 40 feel free to say anything.How I define Regulars - Forum has about 125K posts. Do an adv search with your name to get your post count. If it is >125. You are regular to me.
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MsSuperFoxy
12 years ago
the name calling, arguments etc...let other posters be the judge for themselves. Most of the time it gets sorted out anyways or someone will say something. Like Mes said "our silence can easily be interpreted as us condoning them" What I don't like is when people write up Forums about their FWB scenarios etc especially if they post in the forums or have met on RHP. :/ I find that rather passive aggressive, rather rude and disrespectful in fact! Especially when they person they write about does not have a choice in the matter. Where is the right to their privacy? What message are they saying to the other person?? It says to me they are too weak to talk to the other person face-to-face, shows a personality trait that is unattractive in my eyes as well as shows disrespect to their FWB. I've seen it a few times now in the recent weeks and 99% of the time, it bites the original Poster on the bum!! People reading pick up on what they are doing anyways and normally say something. Let a lot of the forums pan out I say. People/posters will sort it out one or another. :) As for the derogatory comments towards myself, well I just laff them off. Most of the time others reading don't know...LOL! My time is to precious to worry about petty stuff like that. :) It happens Sweetgem in the forums and in Real life. Foxy
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MsSuperFoxy
12 years ago
Quoting 'sweetgem' Anyways, like the good RHPers said on my other Thread, that all these bad behaviours would actully help me filtering out the bad meats, and save me a lot of time on meeting the wrong people!!! - Posted from rhpmobile I agree! Just say "Thank you for increasing my bullshit radar" Foxy
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