M47
Sexual mishaps you've had that were hilarious to experience
April 05 2018
Comments
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MsSuperFoxy
8 years ago
Like accidental black eyes (try explaining that to your boss who advises DV hot line), torn muscles in my bum (had a month off work), locked ourselves out on a highrise belconcy at 3am, rode flamingoes in a garden wearing RHP bikinis, had my chin cut from a high heel shoe (not mine), numerous holidays drinking trips, broke my dining table; the list goes on. I've had a ball with many many hilarous mishaps! 😎 Ms Foxy
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RHP User
8 years ago
You are outta control Quoting 'SuperFoxxxy' Like accidental black eyes (try explaining that to your boss who advises DV hot line), torn muscles in my bum (had a month off work), locked ourselves out on a highrise belconcy at 3am, rode flamingoes in a garden wearing RHP bikinis, had my chin cut from a high heel shoe (not mine), numerous holidays drinking trips, broke my dining table; the list goes on. I've had a ball with many many hilarous mishaps! 😎 Ms Foxy
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RHP User
8 years ago
...but only cleared 7". ⚡️ - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
I've tried to do an adventurous upside down wheel barrow and her legs slipped and kicked me so hard ok the jaw o bit my tongue and had blood all over the sheets lol Let's just say blood is a mood killer lol - Posted from rhpmobile
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Starlet1
8 years ago
All was safe and well and it was an accident so we can laugh now, but it must have been quite the site coming to with a half a dozen naked people checking on you with their bits dangling in front of you 😂. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
I got a massive hicky on my vagina from being over zealous with a pussy pump - was out of action for a week! Pusscat xxx
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EarthQueen
8 years ago
I was going to a concert with a vanilla married friend of mine who was a man. He doesn't know I'm on here. I got to the scanner and held out my phone to scan the barcode but my phone screen saver came up. I turned it back on and swiped back to bar code and swiped the wrong way to a close up picture of my pussy as I was holding it out to the person scanning. I was so shocked I dropped the phone and then got all flustered, picked it up and kept swiping the wrong way to more x rated pictures. Then I had to kind of hunch over my phone like a complete weirdo because everyone was looking at me to try to find the barcode and I'm holding up the whole line .....which is very long. Still not sure if he saw the picture or not he just looked at me kind of puzzled. The moral is put all those pictures straight into the hidden app as soon as you take them and delete them off your photo stream ha ha.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Muffler burn Burnt clit Ants nest Twisted ankle (not how you would think) Broken hoo haa Bruised head of his cock Busted lip from a tooth So I’ve heard 🤦🏻♀️😜 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Love the stories, mines not that exciting but I've had a fwb for over 2yrs and as u get older some parts are not as flexible and sprained my medial ligament in my knee, needless to say when I told the dr I couldn't remember what happened and she's like umm medial ligament is something u would think you'd remember and I said oh I know but u really don'twanna hear how it happened, she was all curious and still keeps asking lol as it still hasnt healed after a few months , u know it's damn good sex when u have battle scars to show for it lol - Posted from rhpmobile
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Chaucer
8 years ago
Not too traumatic, but got a cramp in my thigh while doing the deed, & had to straighten out my leg... while trying sooo hard to stay in the game, but I lost my balance & ended up rolling off the bed going "fuck, fuck, fuck" while not actually fucking. Sore arms & leg where I hit the floor & sore pride where I lost the game. Chaucer
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RHP User
8 years ago
Yeah, I've had a leg cramp up on me a few times several years ago with my ex girlfriend. And right at the worst( best? ) moments too. Me kneeling on the bed wasn't so bad...just roll off to the side, clutching my thigh in a death grip and gritting my teeth like Kyle MacLachlan in the beginning of Dune when he gets tested by the soothsayer..."the pain, THE PAIN..!!" Another time, I was flat on my back and she was performing oral on me( she really, really loved giving oral...it's like she was addicted to it. I miss her.. ) and i get the dreaded leg cramp, and all Im thinking about is mouth, teeth and i really need to let her her know. "Ow, ow, OW..!!" ☺
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EarthQueen
8 years ago
Yes they happen a lot during sex hey? Never get them normally? One for Dr Karl?? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Partner would often experience leg cramps just before climaxing. Have also experienced the odd elbow in the face
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RHP User
8 years ago
That is simply hilarious thank you so much for sharing 🤣😂😂😂😂 If I'd been on the gate I would've let yoi straight in with those wow - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'EarthQueen' Yes they happen a lot during sex hey? Never get them normally? One for Dr Karl?? - Posted from rhpmobile Well, i tried the next best thing...Dr Google. And Dr Google said that leg cramps during sex are quite common among men and women, though women get abdominal cramps too. And the exact reason for the cramps is still unknown, but the usual suspects like a potassium, magnesium or calcium deficiency, an electrolyte imbalance and dehydration are probably related. Sooo....drink plenty of water, warm up the muscles beforehand, eat a banana maybe..?
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RHP User
8 years ago
As he was moving my legs from one side to the other I kicked him by accident so hard in the head his teeth hit each other... but nonetheless the show went on! - Posted from rhpmobile
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MsSuperFoxy
8 years ago
There was this one time I was parking with my lover (who happened to be a local policeman *off duty ) anyways, we were down parking by the Famous Lighthouse @ Raby Bay. I got a leg cramp as my knee got caught between console and front passenger seat. Neither of us could move due to the position we were in. Low and behold who drives by and shines a light into our car. Yep the police, asking if we were ok. 😎 Ms Foxy
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RHP User
8 years ago
I used to get hip lock during sex. As I was in my late teens and missionary was all we knew. It was painful, awkward and bloody embarrassing!!! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
On a meet, I was being ridden pretty hard and fast with my partner just sliding off me and back on me as fast as she could when things haven't quite lined up and ... I swore I heard a crack and I thought I had been broken in half ... The look on her face was 'what have I done' ... It ended the session pretty quickly and we had a laugh .. but that was the end of that ... - Posted from rhpmobile
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bonefide
8 years ago
Muffler burn, ???? hope it was from a motorbike and not a semi trailer. LOL
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RHP User
8 years ago
I had to do a double take too on the muffler burn...I did a meet on RHP a few years ago. went to catch up on my bike, and ended up partying a tad.Took the host woman for a ride - in her shorts - and she got a hell of a bun on her leg...Took her girlfriend next.. and yep.. you got it. SHE got one too.. Two women "Branded for life" Property of "Cavey". so to speak. Still awesomely friends with the host lady an her partner (NOT the one she had then) to this day..Friendships come from all corners, when you are NOT a full-on cunt ;)
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RHP User
8 years ago
AWKWARD moment when I was younger...She was 17, I was 18 ..We were in a 69 with her on top.. home alone.. and sexually RAMPANT..Door suddenly opens.. and "Daddy" is there..She lifts her head. and looks up into Daddy's eyes.. with a line of drool from her lips to the head of my cock.I looked around her legs in time to see the "Horror" in his eyes as he snaps a look to me.. with my face, all covered in the juices of his "Little Stradivarius" ...This COULD have gone a couple of ways...THANKFULLY I did NOT have to fight my way out of there.. as I have had to do on other occasions with cranky Fathers, husbands and boyfriends.. My argument is... every living organism has two primary mandates.. 1) Self survival - (Fighting To stay alive)2) Survival of the Species - (Fucking) To get them BOTH in one evening was ALWAYS an AWESOME Experience..
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RHP User
8 years ago
A couple of sore teeth from a party recently. Clashed during some action. The other participant ended up with a fat lip. Going to the dentist tomorrow, can hardly drink anything cold or bite a biscuit. Was funny as fuck at the time though😂 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
A couple of sore teeth from a party recently. Clashed during some action. The other participant ended up with a fat lip. Going to the dentist tomorrow, can hardly drink anything cold or bite a biscuit. Was funny as fuck at the time though😂 - Posted from rhpmobile
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