Comments
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RHP User
14 years ago
you're taking the piss? . But there is a group of people who fall in love with inanimate objects, I guess sometimes they are bound to get a bit lusty as well.
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RHP User
14 years ago
I love to fuck my furniture the chaise lounge give me such a trill The Ottoman is a sexy thing, it never gives me grief And using my queen Anne at night, gives such great relief I’ve humped a Louis IV chair a cupboard make me cum but anal with a chair leg really hurts my bum If sucked off all the French polish of my aunty’s antique dresser And diddled the umbrella stand, and fucked the fauteuil the couch is getting nervous, the dresser is quiet sore and when I hump the recliner it throws me on the floor. I’ve worked the bookcase, I’ve climaxed a to Z the tuffet said oh stuff-et and and threw me on the settee I wet the bean bag with my juice I’ve, cum on the end table and I would have had the windsor chair if only I was able. The best was the piano it gave me quiet a trill to play a Beethoven with my cunt it gave me quiet a thrill so girls and boys its all good fun to have a furniture fuck fest but just be care full if you do as splinters make a mess.
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RHP User
14 years ago
don't get a splinter in your placenta enter my tent o shopping centerI'll chauffeur your fleur fur ..if you prefer ..chair and a .. load transfer ..err I got nothing.
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RHP User
14 years ago
Tuscanred - thats the best laugh I have had in a LONG time.....
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RHP User
14 years ago
The Tork Bernsen Bumsen settee. And the Karl Ektlond butt-stool(Inc assembly and hex keys) coming to a euro store near you.
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RHP User
14 years ago
only if it says 'yes' first...
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RHP User
14 years ago
Sounds hot!! Nothing like a sex show that involves a bed post going places it normally wouldn't ;-)
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RHP User
14 years ago
oh very poetic. lol
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RHP User
14 years ago
My Kink or Fetish.....Fuking on furniture - now thats a topic
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RHP User
14 years ago
when I the flat pack does not have a key, I can`t errect it without one...bwwhaaaaaaaaaaa
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RHP User
14 years ago
Is that they are limited in conversation skills and I do find that a bit of a mood killer. The bed lies around all day doing nothing, the couch is a little to fat for my liking, yeah yeah more cushion for pushin but hey, I got my standards. The fridge and freezer are naturaly frigid and wont let me near them. The washing maschine is a spin out though.....dizzy blonde. The drier, now that is one hot little number ......
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RHP User
14 years ago
no wonder no one likes a Lazy Boy
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RHP User
14 years ago
Quoting 'MrandMrsErotic'The Tork Bernsen Bumsen settee. And the Karl Ektlond butt-stool(Inc assembly and hex keys) coming to a euro store near you. Now that's something you're not going to see at Ikea KK
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RHP User
14 years ago
As an example - having sex in a chair - with a woman above is most insightful and a real thrill. But having sex with the furniture itself OMG pmsl
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RHP User
14 years ago
I'd like to fuck in the room with balls.
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RHP User
14 years ago
Much prefer to have sex ON furniture than with it......Having lived in the bush for some times in my life, you have to check a knot hole for possum nests...... So, I tend to decline the WITH.... as who knows where the huntsman, redback, or white tip is hiding?A good old modular lounge set floating in a room becomes a gym ;)
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RHP User
14 years ago
As long as it buys me a drink first and tells me I look pretty then I suppose I could get horizontal with a tall boy!
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RHP User
14 years ago
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TomatoSauce33
14 years ago
LoL
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RHP User
14 years ago
Lovely poem, Tuscan :p Ahem. I'd admit to riding the nice, firm arm of a sofa one night at a house party that I was quite intoxicated at a couple of years ago... In front of most of the party guests :/
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Tart_Du_Jour
14 years ago
For some reason my first thought was splinters in my lady parts and the thought made me cringe a little
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RHP User
14 years ago
I'm on a brown leather sofa. If I have sex with it it'd be kinda like having sex with one of those old people who have spent too much time sunbaking on the beach. It is nice and soft though, and my height!!
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RHP User
14 years ago
Quoting 'Jean_Girard'I'm on a brown leather sofa. If I have sex with it it'd be kinda like having sex with one of those old people who have spent too much time sunbaking on the beach. It is nice and soft though, and my height!! .. = Great Orgasms . . . ... Just sayin'
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RHP User
14 years ago
Quoting 'tuscanred' I love to fuck my furniture the chaise lounge give me such a trill The Ottoman is a sexy thing, it never gives me grief And using my queen Anne at night, gives such great relief I’ve humped a Louis IV chair a cupboard make me cum but anal with a chair leg really hurts my bum If sucked off all the French polish of my aunty’s antique dresser And diddled the umbrella stand, and fucked the fauteuil the couch is getting nervous, the dresser is quiet sore and when I hump the recliner it throws me on the floor. I’ve worked the bookcase, I’ve climaxed a to Z the tuffet said oh stuff-et and and threw me on the settee I wet the bean bag with my juice I’ve, cum on the end table and I would have had the windsor chair if only I was able. The best was the piano it gave me quiet a trill to play a Beethoven with my cunt it gave me quiet a thrill so girls and boys its all good fun to have a furniture fuck fest but just be care full if you do as splinters make a mess. Pure Brillance!!! Love it!
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RHP User
14 years ago
MF- male, female, furniture.............sounds like a plan?Cass xxx
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RHP User
14 years ago
LOL and bugger MFF!
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RHP User
14 years ago
I'm pretty handy with Tung oil...no, it's not a lubricant.
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