Comments
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RHP User
14 years ago
Children!
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RogueGeek
14 years ago
in this thread recently: http://redhotpie.com.au/Adult-Forums/Does-the-gold-in-the-wedding-band-cause-loss-of-female-libido-22490 Unfortunately, I posted and killed the thread... HTH Cheers, MS
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RHP User
14 years ago
Back in the day when Adam was a boy being married until death do us part meant being married on average for about 10 years. Lots of reasons for waning sexual interest. Your libido is impacted by health and environment for instance.... the stresses of living, of raising a family, or paying your mortgage... each of us handle these stresses one way or another, and sometimes libidos will not coincide. Unfortunately though it is also easy to lapse into a comfortable pattern... taking your spouse for granted.... Not putting in the hard yards... to ensure the success of the relationship... Apathy or indifference... these are poisons to a healthy sexual relationship. I guess.... Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
14 years ago
Familiarity breeds contempt. Once you have done it with the same person a few thousand times, it kinda becomes a little blase. You know exactly what its going to be like and how its going to play outyou just get to know each other to well.As well as all of lifes little demands that get in the way.Of course then there are children....nothing is ever the same after kid's!Cheers Felonius
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platinumblonde69
14 years ago
I think for some, you become friends more than lovers....The little things in life become big things....eg...money matters....You have kids which alter your lifestyle....You may change jobs which adds more pressure to your daily lives....There are lots of things that you can't foresee when you are getting married....and you are faced with decisions and situations as you get older that you can't prepare for...and you and your partner may end up having different views.....It also depends what age you get married...For me, I got married at 21....thought I knew it all....but now i know i didn't...There are so many personal factors that one cannot explain in simple terms..Only those faced with dilemmas in their life knowand understand what this means....Plat
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RHP User
14 years ago
Seriously I think mostly we get lazy ! In a normal marriage , no abuse or addictions, just two people drifting apart. Men especially , they stop giving time and attention to their wives, which they gave freely in the start of the marriage to get laid. Resentment builds on both sides, kids , sleepless nights and finances eat away at lust. I have been married for 22 years, some good , some bad , but mostly fantastic. We have been 100% committed from the very start of our marriage to make our sex life work. We don't take fights to the bedroom ( can only think of 4 times we have ) From the beginning we commited to sexual activities 3 times a week regardless ( of course sickness and child birth dont count ) but we give sex a high priority . We work as hard on our intimate life together as we do on raising our children . We are happiest together when we are having lots of sex and being intimate with each other - neither of us sees the point in being in a sexless marriage . Not all marriages are boring and lustless, I love my husband, and after 22 years he still kisses me deeply and makes me wet :) It's all about priorites, how hard do you want to work to make it work ( and in the beginning of change the rewards might not be instant) He knows what makes me feel lustful towards him ( time and attention)
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RHP User
14 years ago
Loved Delicious response - trying to do same but it's a but one sided... Plat hit it on the head - everyone's different, take your pick ;-)
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RHP User
14 years ago
Life without love and sex is not a life You are amazing and happy cxx
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RHP User
14 years ago
Kids can certainly get in the way and then if you are unlucky.... An early onset of menopause..... Which translates as men.....oh...... Pause !
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RHP User
14 years ago
I think it's taking your partner for granted. (full stop) They will be there tomorrow the next day and the next day etc. Or will they?All the other stresses that impact one's life/ drive seem to disappear when faced with the prospect of something new and limited to know or never.
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RHP User
14 years ago
we lose it? oh god...i hope not! lol... life takes over, kids included, but only if we allow it. we seem to all forget how to romance our partners, and thats a shame. she gets busy with kids and homemaking, and he gets busy with work and being the provider. and we lose sight of each other........... we make a point of not allowing this to happen...and still 'flirt' with each other, 'romance' each other, and even make 'dates' with each other..... being married and living under the same roof, doesnt exclude us from all those things we shared while courting, and actively keeping the romance alive, keeps you 'connected' and very much aware of each other....it doesnt matter if thats spending an hour cuddling on the couch after dinner, or an afternoon shopping hand in hand, or chasing each other around the house with a bucket of soapy water and a sponge.....we have fun, and laugh like crazed teenagers at times, and the upside of all this, is a sex life that wont quit, and an appetite for adventure that keeps us busy, some weeks 24/7.....
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RHP User
14 years ago
Most of the above tends to happen and affect deeply the sex life.....But there are things that can be done to reverse all that, and find deeper way to contact/connect with each other.Tantra practice is a great way to find deeper connection and experience more profound ways to experience each other...But it requires a lot of commitment and practice....I guess it all comes down to priorities.....Paris
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RHP User
14 years ago
Bob and I have been married for 20 years and we still enjoy a full sex life, if fact I would say that we have more sex now than we did when we were young and carefree and before two children.Yes the every day stresses of life get in the way sometimes, but hey - life would be very boring if it didn't.Marriage doesn't have the end of your sex llife.
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RHP User
14 years ago
I can't relate to this idea that we lose the drive in marriage.I have been with my wife for 17 years and we still have sex around 30 times a month. We are also in a secure open relationship and have sex with other people too...We are healthy, take care of our bodies and do our best to look good for eachother...and we genuinely enjoy eachothers bodies still after 17 years..Sex drive doesnt diminish because of marriage - it fades due to a host of reasons and often people just grow apart and lose interest.....Danny
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RHP User
14 years ago
I was in a monogamour relationship for over 20 years and I did not notice our libido's waning at all. Well maybe just a little as we grew older. We stopped wanting sex three or four times a day and reduced it to three or four times a week instead. But then kids and work got in the way a little.
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