M48 F48
Seeking Partnered Men
May 30 2024
I'm polyamorous with a long-term (live-in/life) Nesting Partner.
I fell into polyamory after being a bad swinger who caught the feels for a long-term FWB - who knew that if you had great sex with someone weekly for nearly 2 years the dynamic might change 🤣🤣🤭🫣🙃
That connection evolved and has now devolved and I find myself really wanting to find guy to step into that boyfriend role. A genuine ongoing connection but one without a desire for me to move in one day, leave my NP etc etc.
The guy I was seeing was essentially monogamous to me, I didn't ask for that it was just how it was. If he were here on RHP he'd have a single guy profile. I'm feeling that the pool I should be swimming in is the one full of partnered men, in open/poly relationships and with a Nesting Partner of their own. So that our expectations of what we want and can give is balanced.
At the moment I'm driving this profile listing as a couple because to be a real match with me someone would need to be really cool and happy with connecting with me and my NP sometimes... And I thought maybe a poly couple might see it and find appeal with connecting...
However I'm wondering if I should change it to single female as I'm looking for a match with me...
And do I add looking for men to my profile and just deal with the single guy/fuck boys/unicorn hunters reaching out without reading my profile?
I read all the time that there are heaps of polyamorous partnered men whose wives are out dating while they struggle to find anyone who doesn't want to ride the relationship escalator with them so I stay hopeful but I'm actually yet to meet any...
Interested in hearing thoughts on whether I should go single female &/or add guys and from guys who do or have played solo re - their profile structure or anecdotal thoughts from those who have connected with partnered guys...
Thank you
Comments
MrandMrsEss
7 months ago
Ha, i think we fall into the "bad swingers" group too as we aren't overly attracted to primarily sexual contacts but hope for a little more. I'm not sure there's an absolutely correct profile type for you, as you're a couple then I think that fits and it shouldn't be frowned upon that each partner might have different desires. I'm (Mr) interested in exploring poly relationships but just haven't found an effective way to engage with people who want the same. We have tried adding men to the profile but couldn't cope with the messages, I guess it depends on how much time and energy you have spare to sift through the messages from every man that comes across your profile. Good luck!
Reefplay
7 months ago
You’ve given an open accurate description of your desires. Really nicely written too.
I’d keep your profile as a couple as it’s respectful to your NP although he obviously knows.
Good luck with your searchRHP User
7 months ago
A single female profile will make sense to the guy who wants you for the reasons you lay out.
He’s probably not looking at couple profiles and is quite selective about when and how he hunts. That’s the reality of the level you seek.
Be open about your situation on your bio for sure. He’ll enjoy that and approach you with that in mind.
Alexis
7 months ago
I'd go with a single female profile and list your relationship status as attached. Unless your NP is going to be heavily involved in the relationship also... which it sounds like he won't. Only occasionally.
As far as listing that you're looking for men, you can either do that and sort through the madness or just pay for a membership and reach out to people yourself.
Briscouple29
7 months ago
Looks like a mix of opinions on here.
If it was us - wouldn’t change a thing. I.e. keep it as a couples profile and you have written your profile really well. Best of luck!
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