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February 25 2017

It has been well over a decade since I had a D/s relationship. I was brand spanking new, had just been floored by the movie The Secretary and new my life had irrevocably changed. There was no going back to vanilla. I dived on in head first,;met an America on AFF and before I knew it, I was in a M/s 24/7 TPE Gorean (cringe...Conan the Barbatian meets Princess Leia) marriage. I won't bore you will too much detail but will say he was no Master or even Dominant - he was a sadist (and in retrospect, I have no doubt that had he been given a diagnosis, it may have been a double diagnosis of narccissist & psychopath).

I've tried vanilla dating & relationships but I eventually become tired, bored and resentful and leave or I don't have relationships at all, preferring lovers & FWB over the type of connection/bond with another that I want.

My sticky spot, I won't 'play' & be submissive for a couple of reasons, it doesn't seem safe and I'm precious about the submissive aspect of my nature and selective/self-protective of my surrender.

I know about Hellfire, attended a two in Melbourne before I left but since relocating to SE Qld I have been too unsure & more than a little anxious & scared to attend any parties or clubs because my exhusband lives here.

I want to actually dive into my kink and start exploring who am in but feel a bit stuck...

- Posted from rhpmobile

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Missb4u
8 years ago
But I know you're on Fet and your experienced so make friends and go from there.

Brisbane has quite an extensive scene once you get into it. I'm not personally in it just on the fringes occasionally because of some sensational friendships I have.

Is it a fear of what your xhusband will do or how he will react?
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RHP User
8 years ago
If the ex is active in the lifestyle, you will no doubt cross paths with him, as its a very small community in SEQ and Northern NSW. But if he isnt an actual Dominant, and just finds young women on other sites, he probably isnt a known person. If he isnt on fetlife, then he probably wont go to any Bris or GC venues or parties.

Just pic a venue on fet and get out there and network. Find your people. There is a monthly female only event at goldcoast. Lots of rigging,impact and social. Might be a good start for you to feel at ease Ive seen you on fet too. Most of us are in the same groups, and have some mutual friends.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Soo many 😀

- Posted from rhpmobile
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Lovinit28andKC72
8 years ago
I concur with what Willow has said, we are active members of the SEQ BDSM scene. Fet has lots of nice little munches, workshops, events and parties.
We hold a small BDSM Play Party on the Sunshine Coast once a month, for people from all walks of life. It's somewhere for people to go and not feel pressure, to be comfortable in their own skin, with no judgement. We have had a couple of regular posters in here who have enjoyed their experiences at our little party.💋
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RHP User
8 years ago
He was not there last nught but has built quite the prolific network of 'like minded others.' I spent the evening wiith two new friends and after the initial half hour of anxiety about bumping into him (and imagining I kept seeing him everywehre) - I forgot about him and was lost in the skill and arts I enjoy rigging, shibari and flogging. The venue and people were different, vastly different from the Melbourne seen.

- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
I woykd really love that...I'm in dire need of some impact play at the moment and generally would just appreciate meeting new friends who aren't going to drop their gear at the mention of kinknor bdsm.

- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Keep an eye on events in fl. There is also a new monthly womens only sunday meet, that is going great. Lots of laughs,networking and chatting about everything from what ropes work best in cold weather to best chicken soup recipes. Thats in Brissy. Next one in a few weeks. I cant find you on fetty, have you gone down or changed name?
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RHP User
8 years ago
You can find me on FL as Elegant_Prey. I would love to catch up ladies.
Thank you. x

- Posted from rhpmobile
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