F31
Pen pals
March 27 2023
So tell me guys, wtf are you doing on here? 🤯
Comments
Inflation
2 years ago
Alot of men may have an alter-ego online or interactivley, but that's as far as it goes. They can hide behind a screen or phone and have anonymous conversations. When things get real, they back pedal because they've demonstrated someone entirely different online. In reality their confidence is perhaps non-existent.
It's not something isolated to men alone. Women are guilty of this also.
Cold feet might be another reason also. I could be wrong, but just my opinion.
FlirtyNaughty
2 years ago
This puzzled me also, same thing happened just recently for us also. All arranged they keen as, then it was like they just vanished after they said they were on there way, or yes pulled out, or wanted more n more pics. Very time wasting and odd??
FeistyFatty
2 years ago
Sorry you're having this happen. Thankfully it's not indicative of all males/couples on the site. Only had a handful of people flake prior to a meet/playdate in 16 years.
After awhile you'll find your radar for flakes/fakes will be quite accurate. You get a fairly good sense of who's genuine and who's not early on in communication. I find the ones that come on all got/heavy/thirsty are the ones with dick in hand and no balls to meet.
Margo_Lover
2 years ago
A vast amount of people online are fakes, in that they're not who they're pretending to be.
I suspect most are gonna be partnered people looking for online thrills without their partner knowing. So as soon as it gets a little real, they're gone.
Having said that, even getting real people that will agree to meet can be a challenge. It's easier to sit at home well inside your comfort zone, than take the risk of going out to meet people.
So to answer your question, they're not who they claim to be, and are just jerking off, with no intention of ever meeting :(
- Alex.
MsSuperFoxy
2 years ago
They are here, just because they can and want too.
Ghosting: They do it to end all communication. Nothing personal, they've just moved on.
The trick is not to be emotionally invested untill you've actually talked to them on the phone to arrange meeting (time place etc) and you are sitting opposite and looking at them.
Until then, it's just an exchange of messages.
Ms Foxy
madotara69
2 years ago
Think you’ll find the guys who are genuine Will more prefer to meet, like a date and look into your eyes and learn all about you.
Then you’ve got the guys who have no Intensions meeting you, always one more question and don’t care if you get caught up with it all.
Mado
Mado Tara xxMsSuperFoxy
2 years ago
PEN PALS: use the 2am rule. If nothing happens after 2am, well nothing good happen after 2wks. If you haven't met them within a 2wk period, nothing good comes from it. One is more vulerable, easily groomed and can become easily attached. This is when people will lie and be deceitful. Move on after 2wks NEXT!
Ms Foxy
RHP User
2 years ago
I have had exactly the same experience with single women and couples
Reeldeal
2 years ago
I have found this also. Super keen, talk about meeting then "too busy" and just tails off. Such a waste of time. Given the male/female ratio on here I would have thought a genuine lady who wants to meet up would be snapped up, not messed around!
Supernova
2 years ago
Luckily you’re not a dude asking this question…
…you’d be getting absolutely ripped to shreds in these replies with the good ole’ “nobody owes you anything!” Line.
EarthQueen
2 years ago
They are bored at home and want a rush of dopamine through anonymous chat.
Ex007
2 years ago
The average meet time for myself is usually anywhere between 1-3 months. And that's for a meet and greet only. People have busy lives and not everyone's life evolves around their next new fuck or WFB.
Some have a FWB already and weigh up does this new person excite me and do I want to meet them? Or do they want to keep chatting and see if they are worth meeting?
I’m an introverted sapiosexual so if you try to push me without establishing some sort of intelligent friendship connection I'm not even interested in meeting.
I have friends on RHP I've been chatting to for years but we have never met in person. Not that we haven't tried, it just doesn't seem to line up.
I find sometimes guys can be their own worst enemies and they just stop messaging. They message you again months or years later. I ask why they stopped messaging they said they didn't think I was interested in meeting. My reply mmm you actually never even asked if I was interested and I was the one who sent the last message.
Fine example I went to Brisbane today so completely out of character for myself I put up a coffee date on date finder last week for today.
Many many many messages came in. I replied to all messages that were well thought out. Got down to 3 who actually self selected because they were the 3 who continued in conversation.
I picked one purely by location to what area I was in. Then I was ghosted it was too short notice for the others. So I drove home. So from hundreds to 3 to none, it simply is why it is.
Guys if you're interested in meeting someone keep in touch.
countrytouch82
2 years ago
I don't know, haven't conversed online for a while but I think I'm real [pokes arm] and I'll turn up. For example, last weekend, a marketed "singles masquerade ball" in Melb (vanilla website).
However if one is into having conversation at all, not really possible over the doof doof style DJ music so loud it takes three attempts to correctly hear someone say their name. But hey, one has to keep physically making the effort, especially in person. Nothing happens most of the time for any online or in person attempts, or perhaps nothing further, but IMO when it does it's worth it.
steveNmegs
2 years ago
For myself and only speaking for myself I have to work around my wife, kids and my employment. I can be on days off but I can get a phone call that a job has come in and they need someone to do it. I’m not going to turn down payed work just to meet someone. But I will explain what has happened and I will continue the conversation and will reorganise for another time.
ddlbm
2 years ago
Simple answer might be that RHP is just full of guys that like to wank 😂😂
Us4you
2 years ago
The same thing happened to us. We were chatting online and shared pics. Got a room for the night on the Gold Coast, and he never showed up. Messaged the next day to say , "Sorry, something came up".
I put it down to nerves, but this was only our second time playing, and put a doubt in our mind whether to keep trying. Thankfully we did.RHP User
2 years ago
Don’t think you’re alone with this issue. Woman are just as bad at this too. Hot and cold.
It happens far too often. I’m over it to be honest.
I’m starting to think some of these profiles are run by computer AI or bot programs. I’m not joking either.
Until Redhotpie gets fair dinkum about improving the integrity of the profiles on here I won’t be renewing my membership.
As a minimum profiles should be made verify and have a complete profile. Some out there at the moment have the bare minimum. It’s discouraging for people who are on here for the right reasons. It might go along way to removing the pretenders/ego strikers on here.
lets_have_fun
2 years ago
Does it look suspicious to you that 2/3 of male profiles boast an awesome abs photo, claim 9+" cock and look like they could have been a male fashion model? Last time I looked around in real life the proportions and percentages looked VERY different from what is here on the website. Well, I'm exaggerating, but you get my point.
Most of them are fake and using someone else's photos. They may have a stash of extra photos for the messenger, but meeting is not really an option for them. They just want more of your photos to wank on, and to get this feeling of being accepted as a potential mate. And it's not only male profiles problem, plenty of female and even couple ones are also fake.
And not to forget that the online anonymity often makes people show their real inner jerks and just at a whim they bail on you without any explanation or reason. But then, did you actually want to meet them if they happen to be such assholes? Yeah, it's annoying and time waste, but meeting them is even bigger time waste.RHP User
2 years ago
as someone who has been on here as a single and as a couple, it really helps having the Verified Green tick. And yes we/me have been ghosted by men/couples/women especially when planning to meet. Who knows why? no need to get paranoid just is what it is. Sometimes I think it would be good just to have verified profiles and nothing else.
Joel123
2 years ago
I’ll meet you tonight
RHP User
2 years ago
All singles are the same when meeting a couple.
We have put so many countless hours in forming a connection /friendship only to be stood up so many times when it comes time to meet.RHP User
2 years ago
They are husbands and have no intention of meeting people.
RHP User
2 years ago
Who knows?? Who really cares?? Is it anything to do with you ?? Maybe…maybe not…
Draw a line in the sand and let the ship sail once it’s crossed it…
Kinkedbreeder
2 years ago
Trust me it’s not just a guy issue. I experience this every day on here with women and couples too.☺️
MnauMnau
2 years ago
If you lift your age criteria, I'm happy to meet you.
RHP User
2 years ago
Highly likely attached and just enjoying the thought of it. Never any intention to meet just a fantasy for the wank bank.🤣
ComfortZone
2 years ago
Being stood up is cowardly and piss weak. I would never and have never done it to a lady but one or two have done it to me.
The struggle for me lately is not even getting a reply to my messages. I so want to meet up for a coffee or drink but can't seem to find any takers.
cville
2 years ago
Yeah boys.... what ya doin... stop pussying about get in there and finish the deal.... most blokes i think are scared
Garyiskeen
2 years ago
I always show up when I promise. It's common courtesy. But I can empathise as I've had several couples (or was it just the guy?) chat enthusiastically and then just suddenly ghost me
FuninMelb2025
2 years ago
Has happened many times from both men and couples. I like to get a phone no. If they aren't prepared to share that and accept a phone call, I just assume they are not genuine and I move on.
RHP User
2 years ago
On the other side, guys who genuinely want to meet never get a reply back or get ghosted. I had few of the one sided communications. With replies like Good, thanks and okay and you never hear from them 🫡 after few messages.
Richr1606
2 years ago
Hey, I’m pretty new to the site and have been reading the chats / comments. I myself can’t fathom why any body guys or girls would be on a group such as this and be fake / scaredy cat hahah.. well,l I’m sure it does happen but why on earth.!!?
I’m in Brisbane just FYI 👊🏼😀RHP User
2 years ago
Lol well sounds like little games lol I wouldn’t no why when ur about to play with each other lol
Stuartnicecock
2 years ago
I’m the opposite don’t want to chat just want to get it on
RHP User
2 years ago
Its a lucky dip or unlucky dip.
Just this week once again relying on my instincts and also remembering that I had spoken to this person sometime ago.
I changed my mind about meeting.
So the next day this person kindly sent me pics of a massive shit he did in his toilet.
Sometimes there are just no words to explain people's behaviour. Except in this case he was obviously full of shit. 🤦RHP User
2 years ago
LOL. It's just the opposite in my case. I see the ladies do that a lot here.
WayneBray
2 years ago
Got me ? ... my profile says that I am ACTUALLY out to meet and not looking for a penfriend
RHP User
2 years ago
I'm sorry you have had that experience. I am unable to speak for those blokes. Personally I have travelled extensively because I can, to different cities involving flights. Not once have I been let down, and I remain appreciative of the friends I have made who have followed through. All I know is that I have grown as a person with each friend I have made, and it is their loss of self discovery for failing to follow through. I hope you have better luck in the future. M
RHP User
2 years ago
Perhaps they have exaggerated their profile to the point of no return, then got the date, then can't face the lie..lies will lock you up, with truth the only key (thank you Missy Higgins). When reality bites, it's the end of the fantasy for these thrill seekers...I hope you find what you deserve-
EndlessSummer85
a year ago
You women do exactly the same thing to men if you want honesty
Boards
Forum help
Something related with that
Going somewhere & want to hook up?
Hasn't that topic been posted before?
RHP's popular dating tool
Where the heck did that topic go?
Discover what RHP is doing offline
RHP member's RL secrets
reply
like
report