F57
Out of the mouths of babes
April 01 2013
Comments
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RHP User
13 years ago
My kids have come up with classics! One was, while having dinner my then 7 year old piped: Mom, what was the happiest day of your life - the day you married dad or the day that you left him? My save was: when I gave birth to you and your sister. Phew!
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RHP User
13 years ago
A few years ago when our children were quite young, we were "enjoying ourselves" one morning. Whilst in a very compromising position one of them has come into the room, unnoticed and caught us in the act. Well, the sound of this little voice saying, "Daddy, what are you doing to Mummy's Fifi?" was absolutely priceless. The explanation was, "Mummy has a sore one darling, I'm just giving it a little kiss better". :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
My 17yr old young lady, daughter has me in stitches all the time - oh she says funny classics all the time!!Just the other night she couldn't scoop the ice-cream out of the tub...so I tried and broke the darm thing trying to get to it...My daughter goes " Mum you need a boyfriend with muscles for every day of the week, to get my ice-cream out"I said " I honey I do!! and I need more than muscles believe you me".Daughter "Muuuuuuuuuuuum, you're disgusting - but ice-cream and muscles sure do sound nice!!" *giggling*Oh an another time (couple years ago) she asked me for batteries, and not thinking (as in laundry putting on washing) said "There are some bottom drawer of my bedside table honey"OH MY GWAD!! I heard "Muuuuum!!!!" as she found my wrabbitt and was quite disgusted at the fact she'd seen her first real one and that her mum even had one. FOXY
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RHP User
13 years ago
I was getting ready for last weeks RHP meet and greet,my daughter said''Are you meeting those sex people?''....and er ..she is 28
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RHP User
13 years ago
Master 5: "Mum, you're fat".Me: "Yes sweetie I am but that makes me extra soft for cuddles"Master 5: "And you have really big boobies"Me: "Yes sweetie, like big soft pillows."Master 5: "You know, if you hung upside down they'd smack your eyes". yes, they probably would ...
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RHP User
13 years ago
Daughter 1. when having the sex talk about loss of virginity and it may hurt she said, gee mum you went through all that pain just to have me..and hugged me I said, honey what makes you think your dad was my first lover... shocked look Mum your disgusting! I have two goody two shoes daughters............where did I fail?
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RHP User
13 years ago
Anyhoo, our eldest daughter (about 6 at the time) once asked me when we was getting ready for work..."Mummy...why are penises sometimes floppy and sometimes they point up?". I drew a deep breath and suddenly feared the worst, thinking she may have had someone expose themselves to her or worse. I looked at my wife and knew she was thinking the same thing. Wife then asks her where she had seen a penis sticking up?Daughter was a bit reluctant to say anything and our heart rates started pushing up. With a bit of gentle encouragement she finally blurted out "Daddy's penis points up in the morning and it looks really angry". Trying to stifle laughter I asked why it looked angry. She said it goes the same colour as your face when you are angry!!!I used to sleep in the nude all year round and during summer very rarely even used a sheet but unknown to me she had been coming into our room to use the ensuite in the early morning 5-6am. I sleep the sleep of the living dead and never had a clue she was doing that. Needless to say I wear boxer shorts to bed now as I feared I could have become the next Grade 1 news item @ school.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Wunfa' Anyhoo, our eldest daughter (about 6 at the time) once asked me when we was getting ready for work..."Mummy...why are penises sometimes floppy and sometimes they point up?". I drew a deep breath and suddenly feared the worst, thinking she may have had someone expose themselves to her or worse. I looked at my wife and knew she was thinking the same thing. Wife then asks her where she had seen a penis sticking up?Daughter was a bit reluctant to say anything and our heart rates started pushing up. With a bit of gentle encouragement she finally blurted out "Daddy's penis points up in the morning and it looks really angry". Trying to stifle laughter I asked why it looked angry. She said it goes the same colour as your face when you are angry!!!I used to sleep in the nude all year round and during summer very rarely even used a sheet but unknown to me she had been coming into our room to use the ensuite in the early morning 5-6am. I sleep the sleep of the living dead and never had a clue she was doing that. Needless to say I wear boxer shorts to bed now as I feared I could have become the next Grade 1 news item @ school.Apologies. I don't like bad grammar but my pre-post edit read failed. Just noticed a clunker there in the first line. When we "were" getting ready for work not "was" getting ready for work.
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RHP User
13 years ago
how most of us are parents, yet our Kids don't think we have anything to do with SEX- it grosses them right out??? Oh the very thoughts of my parents having sex.....ekkkkkk!!!! It freaks me out a little too.... FOXY
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting Karynb: His response: "Mum, i don't know why you worry about matching.....it's not like anyone is going to see them!" When I first read this, I totally thought he meant your underwear would come off so fast, no one would really see it. Am I sick, or have I just been on here too long? And Paintme: We soooo have to test that theory!
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RHP User
13 years ago
ROFLMAO....... ......but the 9 year old still doesn't need to know! Quoting 'Ms_Devious' Quoting Karynb: His response: "Mum, i don't know why you worry about matching.....it's not like anyone is going to see them!" When I first read this, I totally thought he meant your underwear would come off so fast, no one would really see it. Am I sick, or have I just been on here too long? And Paintme: We soooo have to test that theory!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Ms_Devious' Quoting Karynb: His response: "Mum, i don't know why you worry about matching.....it's not like anyone is going to see them!" When I first read this, I totally thought he meant your underwear would come off so fast, no one would really see it. Am I sick, or have I just been on here too long? And Paintme: We soooo have to test that theory! OK!!!! (but I'd prefer a zero gravity atmosphere ... just saying ...)
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RHP User
13 years ago
For an older brother!
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RHP User
13 years ago
"dad, why were you hurting mum on the sofa last night?"
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