Open relationships/swinging/poly

October 11 2017

Hi everyone. I recently heard a couple of late night conversations on radio shows about polyamorous people and another on swingers. It got me thinking about the differences between an open relationship as opposed to swinging as opposed to polyamory. I don't have any experience in these areas but I'm curious about what kind of lifestyles people have, including sex and relationships. My main question about all this is could one relationship be considered as all three at once? I read on a website that said poly is more about the relationships part than swinging is but I'm sure I've heard of swingers who swing and hang out with the same people outside of that. So what does everyone think? To me it sounds like it's very flexible with numerous interpretations. Keen to hear everyone's experiences and thoughts on this

- Posted from rhpmobile

Comments

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    7 years ago

    For me poly relationships implies their is an emotional attachment and an ongoing thing. You love more than one person



    Open relationships to me says you both date other people as a single person would. Although if you form a serious relationships with more than one I suppose that would be poly?



    Definitely overlaps there



    Swinging is swapping partners at a party or group sex.



    But, someone who is married, has A boyfriend or girlfriend or both and other regular lovers who attends swingers parties with some of the partners and sometimes alone is...... all three? Lol.

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    7 years ago

    do you need labels?

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    7 years ago

    I discovered polyamory first, then solo polyamory, and then relationship anarchy...fast forward almost a decade and here I am exploring the swinging world. If we really have to work with labels....then for me: a combination of solo polyamory and relationship anarchy seems to be the best fit.
    Ultimately, labels are only as good as what they describe. And people are generally more complicated than simple labels and categories.
    But to answer the question: Yes. I think I could have a relationship which overlaps all three at once. And I've probably already had one at some point without really thinking about it. :D

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    7 years ago

    Labels are a good guide, they don't necessarily define people. I think it's silly how people complain about labels.



    Each definition is an acknowledged lifestyle. For instance, poly people might think swinging is totally immoral and wouldn't dream of partaking. People in open relationships may always date one person at a time and never indulge in group situations. Swingers may only swing together and wouldn't entertain the idea of a poly relationship. So, they are distinct from each other.



    So yes, there are people that just role with it and what ever happens or what relationships form is good

    For them so they don't necessary feel a affinity to one lifestyle over another. Not sure if that is rare or not?

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    7 years ago

    Whats solo polyamory if you don't mind me asking. :)

  • FeistyFatty

    FeistyFatty

    7 years ago

    Summed the distinctions up well. We have an Open marriage and are not swingers.

    - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    7 years ago

    Quoting 'CandyDelicious'
    Whats solo polyamory if you don't mind me asking. :)
    Solo polyamory is when you're poly but you don't have (or want) a primary life partner of your own. As in doing heavy big-R "relationship" stuff like moving in together, sharing finances, officially becoming a couple legally, etc.
    To the mainstream world, it probably looks a lot like just "being single and dating around". But the difference is that it's not just a phase in dating someone new, it's a permanent and stable relationship structure. It works for people who prefer a higher level of independence and autonomy in their life than is usually possible with being in big-R relationships (poly or not). eg. Prefer living alone, keeping finances and major life decisions separate, not wanting to put up with the social obligation dynamics of being someone's automatic +1 at all times, etc.
    I've always been too independent for traditional life partner relationships. They made me feel like I'm being smothered with a boiling hot wet blanket. So it was an absolute godsend when I discovered this lightweight way of doing relationships some years ago. And I've been lucky enough to meet people who desire just the right combination of intimacy and independence to keep things balanced. :)

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    a year ago

    Never been able to attend a swingers party but would definitely like to experience that for sure