Not into it any more

September 20 2023

Anyone on here ever had a wife, partner that used to play and everything was going great then for some unknown reason just wouldn’t play anymore and left you sexual frustrated especially when she only gives you sex herself like once a month if your lucky and if so what did you do about it?

Comments

  • Ourmalibu

    Ourmalibu

    7 months ago

    If you don’t know the reason then I suggest you ask her.

  • ElectricDreamers

    ElectricDreamers

    7 months ago

    Maybe instead of seeing sex as something she's giving you - look at her drive as an expression of her energy levels or state of mind. And then see/ask if there's anything you can do to make her everyday life feel easier/more energetic/lighter/more joyful.

    There's a reason it's referred to bring in the mood.

    But also libidos ebb and flow, it's normal. If she's OK with you being here she's more giving and attentive to your needs than 99% of the women in the world. Make sure you let her know you appreciate that.

  • ProfessorBi

    ProfessorBi

    7 months ago

    Mate, I totally feel you. Me and my wife took years to syncronize our sex life in a frequency and intensity that both were fairly confortable. However, it is an on-going struggle for both of us as it gets out of balance every now and then. Make no mistake, we love each other, just as I'm sure it is the same for you, but (un)fortunatley marriage takes a lot of work, shoudn't be like that, but it is.

  • MsSuperFoxy

    MsSuperFoxy

    7 months ago

    Me: I finished myself off.

    Ms Foxy

  • Viccpl

    Viccpl

    7 months ago

    I’d talk to her about it. Life and libido change for all of us - seek to understand is the best advice I can think of.

  • FeistyFatty

    FeistyFatty

    7 months ago

    Meeting and Fucking randos gets boring.... really fast. Once I had a great network of Playmates for group sessions I was truly happy.
    Can't say my (or Hubby's) extra curricular activities affected my at home activities with Hubby though ...... we have a very gregarious sex life.
    Id be asking her, as long as you're prepared to handle the answer 😬

  • Kokoflamingo

    Kokoflamingo

    7 months ago

    This sounds like the messages I get from married guys looking for an excuse to cheat.

  • Felicitous

    Felicitous

    7 months ago

    When you say... 'Used to play' do you mean with you singularly or do you mean in a swinging/ open relationship sense.
    Two very different scenarios.
    Expecting your wife to 'do' anything without understanding the reasons 'why' there's a lack of interest shows poor communication between you both. Making assumptions on the why's can be equally damaging.
    Try and speak about it, as said above (gently without accusation)... maybe she's not communicating the 'whys' because she doesn't want to hurt you.
    It's an awful feeling to love another and feel a loss of sexual attraction.

    Could be libido, could be exhaustion, could be the fact simply, that you've determined it's her 'job' to satisfy you and she's rebelling from expectation... She could just not be as attracted to certain qualities.. could have nothing to do with you. Her struggling with her own identity, how attractive she feels etc
    Sooo many reasons!! It's literally impossible to assume... You need to ask.

    What to do about it?
    I'm a big fan of reflection... Less of, 'It's the other person's 'fault'' and more of , 'what part do I play to contribute to this situation'. After all you can only change your behavior - the other person may or may not... that's out of your control.
    Am I being thoughtful with my partner/ mindful of their needs / present / what can I do to make them feel loved and valued.
    If you can't ask yourself these questions and take action - your 'problem' is likely a loss of respect and value of eachother.
    That in and of itself ensues a loss of attraction.
    Intoxicating intimacy generally requires all.

  • Scorpio69

    Scorpio69

    7 months ago

    well, i don't think there is anything wrong. if you both love one another - then there is no problem here. Sex - sometimes ppl just grow out of it....or play with themselves.

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    7 months ago

    Probably because she had seen your pic on here!

  • RoadPet

    RoadPet

    7 months ago

    Maybe I’m misinterpreting your tone, but it read a bit like you feel entitled to her sex.

    Permitting sex as an obligation or duty is never pleasurable and leads to resentment. Many women are openly talking now about changed dynamics (social, economic), recognising many of us are better off alone while the terms of us being in relationships with men who feel owed access to sex are so unfair.

    I only dry up if/when the felt sense of intimate connection to him wanes or is in question. This includes feeling known, seen and heard, respected, valued and appreciated - and never, ever obliged to give him sex. If her mind has toted the scores and the margin between yours and hers is wide, why would she keep giving?

  • briscouple4play

    briscouple4play

    6 months ago

    Open communication and consent is the key, you need to be ready to listen

  • madotara69

    madotara69

    6 months ago

    I often wonder how many wives actually enjoy the ‘play’ urged to explore the bi curious sexuality with hubby and the professional attentiveness with a unicorn, at least give it a shot or more and try different women and fmf’s galore in support of spicing it up bi teaming to spoil him for all the expenses try it all this bi curiosity is going great.
    Yet there’s no chance she might like dp or spitroast, or the assurance he is not even a chance bi curious therefore no need ever for a guy and dp is too close for dicks might touch and that’s gay
    But hey and by the way I’m thinking that women are able to set themselves up by choices of their own accord and when she makes any mistakes she learns how to correct or more for better days create her own instincts to protect things like she can if she chooses and narcissistic, anti social, gas lighting, all in many configurations and sex let’s put into perspectives the demand for pornography expanded the wide band www. To high speed www.
    Women who managed to navigate living in a relationship with an allowance and some tight rules mostly prohibited acts of cheating with other men and the glamour keeping in good Nick owns her and accused she is insulted by taste of love affair’s average looser she sucks his cock in the hiding spot on Monday mornings and 20 min late that proves she is doing it and it’s all an illusion an imaginary gross deception the slut shame and spiteful things to break her down so frightened to obey him day after day for better day’s,
    If she cheats not going to school, cheats in that old elevator and the guy just bumped her because