M63
My brush with death.
September 24 2012
Comments
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RHP User
13 years ago
Sorry you had to go through that, I went through something similar at the scene of a 2 vehicle head onwhen I was a young bloke. Affected me badly even to this day, I'm a much morecautious driver to boot. The guy was dead in the car, and the girl was pretty muchmangled up in the wreckage and died later. I don't know how emergency services peopledeal with that shit.So I reckon it will give you grief forever mate.I wasn't aware there was a media silence about suicide,but I guess a lot of families want it to be kept quiet as well, so you neverhear the full extent of the number of suicides.I've known a few aquaintences and one mate who committed suicide.Unfortunately for many involved, you don't see it coming.Make sure you get some counselling.Cheers Felonious
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RHP User
13 years ago
There is funding but its all over the shop in WA along with a lot of not for profit funding. Crisis line has now got a new CEO and they are ramping it up , as they only recently got government funding. Before that it was all donations. Drugs are a huge problem regarding this, as people have distorted perceptions and get metal health issues especially if they start drugs young. The growing brain does not cope well with drugs and the hydroponic stuff has contributed to the overflow at the locked ward at Bentley hospital. They do not publish for a reason , that is that for some reason if they do then there is a lot of copy cat stuff that happens. Its horrid thing to happen, I once interviewed a girl for a job and tried to contact her to say she had the job, after a while she called back and said a guy had run in front of her car and killed himself when she was driving home that day. Tragic for her as well as him, she never took the job she just fell to bits over it. My aunt and both of my grandmothers committed suicide, a few friends along the way. A sister overdosed but survived. It touches every one. Just make sure you get some counselling , or it will haunt you.
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RHP User
13 years ago
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RHP User
13 years ago
... at an accident going through a similar scenario (me being the one on the ground doing the chit chat) I remember having this horrid pit in my stomach for some days later. It kinda shakes you up. So hope you are OK LRE. KK xx
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RHP User
13 years ago
So I feel ok.. May have been different if she'd died, but then I’ve dealt with dead people before too. Some bloke dropped dead on the Meltham station platform on my way to work about ten years ago. The ambo's who rocked up had no chance with him.It was interesting seeing all the different reactions on the station platform that day. Some tried to help, some walked away disconnected, some totally went to peaces..I recon what I saw today, was that extreme pain stops you feeling depressed pretty fucken quickly. I'm not to bad at reading eyes and this girl did not look like she'd lost the will to live. I'm guessing that surviving a 6 meter drop may just spark her on a little when she can walk again. I'm wondering who the other person on the bridge was and how they feel now?
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RHP User
13 years ago
Thanks heaps.. ~hugs~Actually, I'm glad I’m still about too :-)
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RHP User
13 years ago
there's people like you around bra. I don't know what the situation of the other drivers were to go around her, and keep driving like she's road kill??? Empathy seems to be scarce these days and it's kind of scary...suppose they seen you stop and thought she's right...I hope! I agree with you though, if the media reported suicide like they do murders, accidental deaths ect, then maybe there would be a push for something to be done, as it really needs attention. I too know people that have committed suicide and it still leaves me scatching my head asking myself why?? I'm sure nearly everybody would know someone, or of someone in their community that has committed suicide. It's sad but it's even sadder that it could have been prevented, and it wasn't. Once again, hats off to you red
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RHP User
13 years ago
For sharing such a humbling story LRE xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
but a sad story nonetheless and it's good you're ok.But you gave a person another chance at life. What more can a person in her situation ask for or for that matter how many people can cheat death like that. You should be proud of yourself that you, out of all those people staring was able to take action and no one can take away what you did. cheer up.*shakehands with LittleRedEngine*
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RHP User
13 years ago
Its a day to remember. Just ask some one are they ok? Hopefully they will open up and talk. But not just on this day. if someone you know is acting out of character please keep an eye out for them. The thought of suicide and the actual act spans a long time and can be prevented if you read the signs.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Well done for keeping your cool and helping the girl out. So good to hear that there are people like yourself that care and take the time to stop and help. Pat on the back and hugs SFxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
Two years ago I was driving my son back from training one night when I saw a person standing on top of the bridge I was driving over. I pulled my car over and told my son to stay in the car and call 000. I jumped out of my car and pleaded with the girl not to jump...as I walked slowly towards her I saw that she was only around 14 - 15 years old...She yelled at me to stop or she would jump a couple of times and I just kept pleading with her to talk to me...I eventually got close enough to her to just get her in a hug and told her to cry it out! She told me about having no friends, that she has been from Foster home to Foster home and that noone loved her! When she talked about her childhood it was amazing as there were so many similarities in our younger years...While she was put from Foster home to Foster I was put in a girls home and my parents didn't want me either! I talked to this girl for about 10 or so minutes before the police turned up..When she saw the lights she grabbed the railing and I grabbed her and pushed her to the ground and just layed on top of her until they got out of the car. . The police were great..they were kind and caring and understanding. While one put her in the back of the police car the other one came over to make sure that I was ok. He even hugged me and thanked me for stopping and kept asking over and over if I was ok! They were so great that I wrote a letter to the Commissioner about them. When the girl had calmed down they allowed me to sit in the back of the police car for 10 minutes to talk to this young girl and I let her know that life does get better and that she is here for a reason and that she should go on to help other girls in her situation and to show them hope. She ended up thanking me and giving me the biggest hug! When it was all over...I felt sick to the stomach and was in pain for hours! . One thing I didn't think through and it made me feel bad, was, when I got back into the car my son was crying and said that he was scared that the girl was going to push me over the bridge with her. I just explained to him that that didn't even enter my mind...my only thought was on her and making sure she didn't jump! . What you did was a good thing LRE..I understand your anger at noone pulling over to help .. but people deal with situations in different ways...Not being able to help someone is not a disconnection...it is a fear! I still have a lot of faith in humans! Hugs...xFunlovingx
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RHP User
13 years ago
I was also raised in a girls home, have you ever heard of clan? take a look if you do not know about these guys and they have a face book page as well small world at times
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WHY_NOT_LOOK
13 years ago
wow you were the one chosen to help this girl and to keep calm thats hard for most people, but for some reason if your meant to help you just step up and it happens before you really think.. just like fun loving. Its a circle that needs to be broken.. drugs... family break ups... sexual abuse in family... or trusted people;;;;cutting.... suicide...alcohol .... bulling... what ones do we fix... im not really smart but if we dont change the kids today the cycle will continue... there are alot of help pages on Face Book for everyone. I help on a page that i couldnt believe the stories at first they were so sad and omg so brutal i cried for days being a mum i wanted to save them all.. Ive now relized my ability to help i chose a few a week to help with and offer advise and tell them they are worthy of love and to be loved... they trust a stranger more than they trust there family teachers doctors because most have been hurt or ignored by these people... they get advice from young old men wpmen and its monitored rather closely... i wont say the one im on but if you message me ill point you in an area to help .. we need to get back to the basics again looking out for your friends and neighbours ect... asking are we ok ... showing support and not judging others. This site as well is so kind in the forums offering real help and advise its really touching sometimes ... you guys in the forurms dont relize the power you have to be able to make people think outside the box so i say to all of you keep being who you are because your a bunch of the most caring kind people i have chatted with. Now everyone keep safe but keep helping xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
for this post LRE and Funloving,very humbling and examples of how in our everyday lives we can be confronted with situations that are literally life and death.You both acted out of complete selflessness and compassion, without thought for your own safety. How fortunate were both of those desperate young women that on that day,at that time, you were there.The outcome for both of them could have been so very different.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I wondered if I'd have funny dreams or something last night. The image of a body tumbling though space is still very clear. But I was fine and slept like a stone. I have to say I spent the second half of yesterday feeling pretty useful. Quite proud of my self.And thank you all so much for your kind words. The universe is immense, I'm but a speck. But a speck once noticed can still feel important.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I loved reading your post, and regarding the concluding paragraph. I agree we shouldn't be harsh on those that walk away or don't help. We don't know them or their situation. Personally when faced with "crazy" situations I go into automatic pilot, get on with the job in hand and then when it's all done and dusted I really feel it and always need a cuppa! All hale to the humble cup of tea!But I know some folk who just can't cope in a crisis situation and yet at other times they are truly kind and caring, beautiful people. We are all unique. KK xx
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RHP User
13 years ago
Well LRE you certainly have been a good boy. I note you ask about suicide prevention and why suicides are not reported more often. I would love to say enough is being done regarding suicide prevention and couselling but I can't. It is a very difficult area and it is difficult finding people with the training to deal effectively with the issues involved. I note also that suicide is not reported well in the media due to concerns regarding copy cat suicides. There are many reasons people decide to take their life some revolve around persistent mental illness, some around gender& sexuality in teens, some involve bullying, loss of job, loss of marriage, lack of education/opportunity/socio-economic issues. I work in a major metro hospital and often am involved in the care of people who self harm or attempt suicide and find the stigma involved in mental illness a major barrier to dealing effectively with the causes of suicidal behaviour. I am aware that many of my fellow nurses find it difficult to deal with mental illness and tend to get me to help with some of the more problematic behaviours. Please don't judge them as I am very aware of general attitudes in the community to mental illness and in the media. Some in the community aren't particularly helpful when attitudes are "get over it" , "harden up ya pussy", and various other less than insightful comments. Please don't forget there are various campaigns run on tv and other media advising on the various groups providing couselling. and again nice one LRE Mike
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RHP User
13 years ago
can do what you did.. It takes a very special type of person to step up and do what you did.. As much as I hate it, I really battle with my emotions when I see someone hurt.. As much as I would like to just step up and take control , I find it hard. Mind you, if push comes to shove and its left up to me, I know I would get in and do what I had to do..After half a lifetime in football (rugby league ) I have hurt and been hurt and seen some real bad injurys. I have carried off broken bodies and been carried off my self and never ever thought too much about it. But a accident scene, or something like you witnessed effects me differently... specially when it come to the young children and the old.. Remarkably, my son is the opposite, a Paramedic who never ever gave a second thought to helping anyone and something he does on a daily basis... Obviously, he did not inherit those fantastic traits from me..
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RHP User
13 years ago
I was spread out on the dirt after coming off my bike at 150 kliks. A sweet young lass came running to my side and asked if I was alright. I couldn't even focus to tell you what she looked like. I said, "I'm fine. I think I'll just lie here for a while." The farmer whose property I landed in came running up. "Is he alright?" "I think so." answered the girl. "Thank God. The last fella who did that is dead." That was reassuring. The paramedics arrived. I was taken to hospital. A couple of days later, when I was back at home recouperating in bed, the farmer brought my bike home to me in his trailer. I have to add my voice to the others here in expressing gratitude that Samaritans like you still exist, LRE.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Fucking well told story!!I know the "I'll just lie here a while" feeling.. ~LOL~
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RHP User
13 years ago
LRE..:) As you know Hun at some point in our Lives we put upon to step forward and be Counted in times of Chaos .. It's how we react or act at the time that helps us move forward with a sense of Fulfillment..You did that at this time in Spades.. With your clear thinking and Compassion for another in need you comforted her when she most needed it in that unfirtunate time.. Blessings To you Hun for the Spirit realm is surely doing the same ..Regards Lu :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
I want to Acknowledge all those who have been Involved in a Life/Death situation ..Have come through the turmoil and grown into very Positive Individuals and those who stepped up when they were called to do so by the Universe Know each and everyone of you do make a difference in others Lives.. Blessings To you all..Lu :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
Yeah that feeling bike riders have, especiallyMX riders, I got to experience that feeling againon Sunday, a 0km/h spill....dohCheers Felonious
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RHP User
13 years ago
To LRE and Funloving Thank you to both of you for your brave acts of kindness and compassion (and yes they are brave, especially FL cause you never know what state a person is in when you approach them) ……and for sharing your experiences….I hope now that you are both well……...you have both restored my faith in a world that is now somewhat jaded and cynical and to be honest, I have become that way as well……. After returning to work on Monday from a month’s leave due to illness, I’ve spend the last 2 days involved in the committee writing the for the 2013-2017 Western Australian Suicide Prevention Plan that Mrs P mentions..for the next 4 years. There is 27 of us in the Strategic Planning group….a cross section of “Care workers”…..police, doctors, nurses, child protection workers, youth workers, paramedics, social workers etc…. the first day Monda , we were reviewing the stats gathered over the last 4 years on suicide. 3142 people suicided Australia in 2010 (yes you read right) – stats for 2011- have not been released yet…this is determined suicides where the Coroner has ruled that the death was suicide, there are many deaths that are never reported for various reasons especially in regional towns thru out Australia so this number is probably higher. Youth suicide has declined – the belief being that the copycatting of previous years has not been as prevalent plus there has been a lot of funding directed at this issue and of course media support, this is a fantastic thing. High risk now is women between the ages of 48 – 58 –too many factors to write here as to why this has increased but worrying (acutely aware this is my age group) Increase was also noted in men aged between 37- 57 who were FIFO workers (WA and Qld) – much discussion was held around this fact. So Monday passed in a daze of pie charts, stats, arguments over funding, frustration at the shortage of service providers, annoyance that due to staff shortages and time constraints, you can’t spend time with the people that you need to spend time with during and after their crisis situation…..how screwed you are if you live in regional WA where you can’t get any medical access, inadequate mental health funding.. ….bla bla bla, so all of us smart ass academics sat around trying to resolve an issue that is older than Adam and how /what were we going to do and how were we going to make a difference for the years 2013-2018…… Tuesday – reality check – as Europian Bliss mentioned… 13th September was “R U OK ? “Day – a national day of action, dedicated to inspiring all people of all backgrounds to regularly ask each other ‘Are you ok? “…now this campaign commenced in 2009 and where I work (a major hospital in Perth) it was widely promoted, posters, cards, banners everywhere……the facilitator of the group asked us all yesterday as Care Professionals to honestly fess up if anyone of us did on that actual day, ask someone in our lives, a work colleague, friend, family member, neighbour etc….”R U OK ?” Not one of us raised our hand, including myself………………………………………….and we were all shamed….. See we all have a duty of care….but how many of us don’t approach anyone in crisis…? I’m trained to deal with crisis situations, yet I will be honest, I don’t go and check on my lonely neighbor, nor do I really inquire after a work colleagues general wellbeing – it’s the usual “Hi how are you “Yeah good thanks and you ?”” Everyone in that room yesterday can deal with trauma situations yet we were uncomfortable in approaching someone who wasn’t showing obvious signs of stress…and yet again stats show that one in the three of us is suffering from a form of depression We all lead busy lives, caught up in our own struggles, issues and mini dramas……all wearing our masks and doing the best we can with what we have……….. We will probably ring a friend who is experiencing a crisis situation, (split with partner for instance or loss of a parent) but how are we at follow-up when a person is at their most vulnerable, sometime after the event? Nine msn conducted an online poll the “R U Ok” day…asking the simple question R U ok ? 82,939 people responded to that poll Only 11,338 said they were ok That’s 71, 601 people answered that they weren’t OK….what’s happening with them now ?? Last nite, feeling like a complete failure at my job and with a billion sad statistics buzzing around in my head…I was leaning against the train window wondering how can I make a difference ?……my phone went ping ping..I received a sms from a friend who knows I’m having a bit of hard time at the mo, and is also going thru her own hell…..she asked how I was ?. …I told her the truth…I’m ok but yes I am a bit blue for a few reasons of which she knew about..…..we ‘ve arranged to catch up on Friday – I also know that due to her circumstances (that are beyond her control) she may have to cancel last minute…but that’s ok…cause it meant so much to me that she just sent me a sms thinking of me. In a few seconds I went from blue to feeling loved. We are all capable of doing random acts of kindness and it can be as simple as a sms. You don’t have to be a trained professional to help a person in need….everyone is capable of asking the question “R u OK ? and listening, just listening…..…..it just comes down to, are we prepared to take some time out from US to being there for THEM ?
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RHP User
13 years ago
for me, it happened a long time ago...when i was seven years old...i had an alcoholic dad...it was quite bad..after a while, my mum divorced him, because of the effects it had on us, kids..(got a half sister, who was 14 at the time)...despite the divorce, we had to share the 2 bedroom apartment with him, still...(bloody communist system)anyway..by the time, i turned 7...my mum couldn't take it, anymore...one day, she sent me down, to the shops (it was just her and me at home)..when i got back, she would not open the door....she didn't know, that i knew, how to break in, through the balcony (kids will be kids...lol)when i got in...i found her, in the bath...both of her arms cut up, half passed out in the hot water, which now was scarlet red, from all the blood...will never forget the site...i didn't know, what to do...luckily mum's friend, who lived next door, was at home...the ambulance came quick, and she survived...(although she couldn't even wipe her own bum for 3 months)it was an experience, i will never forget...or wish upon anyone else...but i guess, your experiences make you, who you are, in a way....for the better or for the worse....
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