M53
Manners? Do they still exist...
August 24 2013
Comments
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RHP User
12 years ago
assume that no response is a response....just the way it is here for lots of women too many men not enough time....and we hate to hurt your feelings. Sometimes that attractive looking woman's profile is actually a catfish...see other topic..Catfish.
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RHP User
12 years ago
What freya said. Dont take it personally - it is just simple maths.
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Tall74nHard9
12 years ago
with the two above. It is just common courtesy that if someone takes the time and effort to contact someone else, that you spend a moment to let the other person know of your feelings, whether yea or nay. Simple manners never goes astray....
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Coops27M
12 years ago
RedHot3.14reaccuring? ;)- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Tall_n_Hard'with the two above. It is just common courtesy that if someone takes the time and effort to contact someone else, that you spend a moment to let the other person know of your feelings, whether yea or nay. Simple manners never goes astray.... Tall'n'Hard, yes ideally, in a perfect world it would be expected to receive a reply for every message you send. But in reality for some of the women here it is just impossible. I know of some here that often received between 50 and 100 messages a day (of course half of them are probably from the same guy lol). How are they expected to reply to that many and still get on with life? If I send a message and don't get a reply I take it I failed the initial ".. woman glances at her overflowing in box, highlights those that are outside of her age criteria, that don't have photos, are interstate etc., and hits the delete button". That then allows them to concentrate on those they are interested in, kind of makes sense right. Hell there are still guys here upset because a flirt doesn't get an answer lmfao. Mooka
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RHP User
12 years ago
I try to reply to every flirt and message I receive (easily done as I don't get anywhere near the 50-100 that Mooka mentioned! lol) and most men generally appreciate the response, even if it is a simple "no thank you".I did have one "gentleman" just the other day, however, that didn't appreciate my lack of interest. He replied with comments about my photos and my weight that were immature and unappreciated. But thankfully his were the only nasty comments I have received. Most people appreciate it when you take the time to acknowledge and reply. Manners are free, after all....
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RHP User
12 years ago
A reply of some sort should be attempted, we feel, even if it is a template "no thanks". It doesn't actually take THAT MUCH time.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Freya77' assume that no response is a response....just the way it is here for lots of women too many men not enough time....and we hate to hurt your feelings. Sometimes that attractive looking woman's profile is actually a catfish...see other topic..Catfish.Lots give that argument - but in our opinion that's a cop out. Just our opinion.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I used to think that every message deserved a reply, even those from people who had completely ignored my preferences - until the majority of replies-to-my-replies were rude, disrespectful and bordering-on-aggressive - so now I don't reply in the negative, not worth the aggro to try and be polite.....
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RHP User
12 years ago
...I also don't worry too much if my messages don't get replies, I figure I don't "fit" what the other person wants *shrug*
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beachgal20
12 years ago
I agree that it shows manners to try and reply with a thanks, but no thanks..I do it with messages...less so with the dozens of flirts from male guests, especially thosewithout pics or much of a profile. It's not an easy task to say not interested when the guy has been so generous in genuine comments..I have no qualm though with the crass ones!!!
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RHP User
12 years ago
alright alright I'll answer that one mesaage......(50-100 wow)
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RHP User
12 years ago
I agree with all points on this topic. Manners do not cost anything & certainly it doesn't take a lot of time to write a quick thank you but no thank you. However the real world is just not like that, either people don't have enough time, receive too many emails etc & don't have time to answer them or they are just plan rude & couldn't care less. I would give this advice to anyone who sends a message but doesn't receive a reply, you probably dodged a bullet-would you really want to share your time & self with someone like that anyway? They are not the person/people for you, you are better off without!
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beachgal20
12 years ago
Good points there goodtime...there are times we dont have time...and I must admit when I posted a travel plan to WA I had nearly 100 messages in 3 days...didnt know how I should deal with them!!! The crass I ignore now and yes...the person who posted this.. I have been chatting to all week...nice to see a guy with respect and manners....such a rarity!!!
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RHP User
12 years ago
If I get contacted by someone whom I clearly am not interested in as per my pretty obvious profile I consider it a lack of manners if you still contact me, so in that case... You won't get a reply. I will assume you 'accidentally' messaged me and forgot to read my profile and accept what I am after. Alternatively, I might have to assume the sender can't read in which a reply is not needed. Right? Most others get a reply I must say...- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'TongueCramps'Lots give that argument - but in our opinion that's a cop out. Just our opinion. It takes one second to send a template reply. Here's one I made and use daily: Hi ..., thanks for your message. You're not quite who I'm looking for I'm afraid, so all the best and happy hunting! x M
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Tall74nHard9
12 years ago
Quoting 'Mesmerised' Quoting 'TongueCramps'Lots give that argument - but in our opinion that's a cop out. Just our opinion. It takes one second to send a template reply. Here's one I made and use daily: Hi ..., thanks for your message. You're not quite who I'm looking for I'm afraid, so all the best and happy hunting! x M Obviously takes more than a moment to type out your reply, but at least it shows courtesy and respect to the person who contacted you. Couldn't argue with a reply like that ..... nicely done M.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Try not to be too attached to outcome on this one.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Sorry but I am with TongueCramps & Mesmerised on this one. I always try to reply to any contact as the time it takes in minimal (50 - 100 per day Mooka?? damn I must present even worse then I thought lol)With the added advantage that technology gives us to set up a "thanks but no thanks" template it is a 5 second process, also I believe that just deleting with out even looking at a message might mean that I miss out on chatting with someone cool - why would anyone want to miss out on that?Be good people and if you cant be good then be good at itKissesClaire I Dare
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threesixty
12 years ago
Thanks for the comment. Manners are a free commodity, if you don't use them, expect the same in return.... It's not Russia...
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threesixty
12 years ago
That's a different spin on it. True about people being time poor, but again it's not that hard is it???
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Tall_n_Hard' Obviously takes more than a moment to type out your reply, but at least it shows courtesy and respect to the person who contacted you. It's saved in my templates, so it's literaly a case of "Select", enter name if they've given it (otherwise it will be "Hi there") and hit "Send". Less than five seconds. And Mooka, who are these women with 50-100 messages? I got that amount the first three weeks or so after I joined, but currently I average five a day. Maybe I'm doing something wrong? Should I add I'm looking for fun and NSA sex? That should do it.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Mesmerised' Quoting 'Tall_n_Hard' Obviously takes more than a moment to type out your reply, but at least it shows courtesy and respect to the person who contacted you. It's saved in my templates, so it's literaly a case of "Select", enter name if they've given it (otherwise it will be "Hi there") and hit "Send". Less than five seconds. And Mooka, who are these women with 50-100 messages? I got that amount the first three weeks or so after I joined, but currently I average five a day. Maybe I'm doing something wrong? Should I add I'm looking for fun and NSA sex? That should do it. Ah the delightful young Mes. Okay I might have exaggerated for the benefit of getting a point across. I do know three women who did get that amount of emails when they first joined, caused all three to cancel their accounts. And I was going on anecdotal evidence that some of the women responded to when this topic came up a while ago. On topic, yes I agree, it is polite to respond to all messages, I always do (okay I might get one a month, sue me lol) but I can understand how some here can get overwhelmed with it all. I honestly can't image how frustrating it must be to see your inbox fill from people who evidently didn't read your profile, and you know probably half the unread emails will be either a one liner (sometimes crude and crass). Also don't forget the fact that some here can't take rejection well, if at all so you run the risk of getting a nasty vile message back just because you did the right thing and responded, even if it was in the negative. Mooka
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'mooka' Also don't forget the fact that some here can't take rejection well, if at all so you run the risk of getting a nasty vile message back just because you did the right thing and responded, even if it was in the negative. Out of all the messages I have received in the last year, wich would be over 2000, less than ten have been nasty. Add a few "But I promise I am..." and a couple of "Why not hun?"s to that, but I think that's not bad! Ladies, I've heard of (and read) replies along the lines of: "As if", 'I am way out of your league", "Ewww you smoke, get lost". And they thought it was odd they got an angry response.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Mesmerised' Out of all the messages I have received in the last year, wich would be over 2000, less than ten have been nasty. Add a few "But I promise I am..." and a couple of "Why not hun?"s to that, but I think that's not bad! Ladies, I've heard of (and read) replies along the lines of: "As if", 'I am way out of your league", "Ewww you smoke, get lost". And they thought it was odd they got an angry response. Mes, excellent point! I have received a few of those responses over the year, maybe half a dozen all up and whilst they did bruise the ego I didn't respond in kind. I just put it down to dodging a bullet, if they act like that after receiving an innocuous msg, how bad and rude are they in real life??? Unfortunately there are some here, both male and female, that their ego and self worth knows no bounds (at least in their tiny minds anyway). Mooka
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madotara69
12 years ago
Quoting 'Mesmerised' Quoting 'TongueCramps'Lots give that argument - but in our opinion that's a cop out. Just our opinion. It takes one second to send a template reply. Here's one I made and use daily: Hi ..., thanks for your message. You're not quite who I'm looking for I'm afraid, so all the best and happy hunting! x M but our message to you is subliminal.
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Tall74nHard9
12 years ago
You're quite welcome , my lovely. Always a pleasure to deal with a kind and respectful lady. Tall
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RHP User
12 years ago
We, as mere males, probably just have to accept the fact that when the blood is pounding in our head and we hit the send button it is because the person we are sending to is in the top 10% of the hottie list (don't ask, just made that up).With these ladies being in the minor numbers (where did I read that there are way more men on this site than women?) the odds are well and truly stacked against us in getting a bite. (Lady Mes gets say 5 messages a day... that's 35 a week... that kind of competition is hard to beat. Thus Meet and Greets are great!)So we must suck it up and accept that either the ladies we send to (not that I have... yet) either can't be arsed responding (agreed that is rude), aren't as intelligent as Lady Mes or just haven't seen your message in among the flood of other "I want to be your man-whore" messages.Now if they are nasty/rude face to face... that is a different bucket of chowder.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I guess at the point of it just being a message then if first glance is interesting can't hurt. With meeting people then for women I think more caution of course. Many people are here for various reasons...it's a matter of finding people who have similar wants to you..... For me, messaging is harmless and an introduction. A males perspective and enjoy :)
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