It's a big country

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  Lovinit28andKC72

  11 years ago

  When I first joined RHP 12 months ago, I lived in a small country town in the middle of bumfucknowhere population 1000 people. The problems I faced were. 1. There were very few single men to start with. 2. If you were friends with a man it was assumed by all that you were fucking him. 3. Everyone knew what you or who you doing, even if they didn't. 4. Most people were judgmental and narrow minded. 5. It was a long way for anyone to travel just for a meet. How did I deal with it? I packed up and moved, first to a bigger country town and then to the city.....💋

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  Quoting 'Lovinit28' When I first joined RHP 12 months ago, I lived in a small country town in the middle of bumfucknowhere population 1000 people. <500 The problems I faced were. 1. There were very few single men to start with. Ditto for women 2. If you were friends with a womanit was assumed by all that you were fucking him. 3. Everyone knew what you or who you doing, even if they didn't. Agree 4. Most people were judgmental and narrow minded. Agree 5. It was a long way for anyone to travel just for a meet. Pro and Con How did I deal with it? I packed up and moved, first to a bigger country town and then to the city.....💋 Good for you Lovinit!(It is good isn't it?) Awesome topic Aurora! I've done it a bit different to Lovinit but I have experienced the same issues.Originally hailing from a small country town, I know and love, and also hate, the "everybody knows everybody and what everybody's doing" situation.A couple of years ago I was in Brisbane and entering the world of RHP... finally a place where I can be who I want to be, and almost completely anonymous. Instead of being judged (well I'm in the forums so that's gonna continue ) I was welcomed.In what seems another lifetime I was happy to freely converse with the people that I met who I was, what I was into and what I was looking for. Then, silly me, I end up in a small country town for work and surprise, surprise, facing the same issues as mentioned above by Lovinit. I've upgraded in recent times though. It's not Brisbane and there aren't even direct flights to some places but it shows some promise. I'm still discovering how open and how far I can... ahem... expose myself after reemerging and only being in Town a few weeks. That's the beauty of not knowing anyone here though, I don't care what they think of my lifestyle. So on to the positives of swinging in a non metropolitan area.The travel. Make the most of a negative and turn it into a positive. Couples, be safe but get frisky in the car on the way to/from. Pull over for a risque quickie. Having that knowing smile. Swingers in small communities generally have to be discreet. You are a small subset of a small community and know something that others don't. Frightening and exciting at the same time. Trust and friendship. Due to holding that secret as mentioned above, a close bond is often formed and the social "cover" activity is actually less of a cover. Finally, due to the isolation and the travel (and a bit to do with the people of their word country maxim), they're more likely to show up at meets. That's my experience anyway. They might run a bit late but they'll let you know that too (if there's phone service). I'm interested in hearing others pros/cons and how they celebrate/deal with them. CheersRusty

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  Lovinit28andKC72

  11 years ago

  Great photos and profile rusty....💋

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  ...good for you! You did exactly what needed to be done, you go girl!!

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  I live in a greater city that has a population of about 100,000 with the main centre at about 30-40,000 people. Forget anything more serious, just meeting friends can be an issue.... - Posted from rhpmobile

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  Being a single woman who is very keen to explore my sexuality and broaden my sexual horizons, I do find my current location to be quite restrictive in that sense. I have travelled to Melbourne and Sydney and had some great experiences, and although I'd love to travel more it's just not feasible for me financially at the moment (full time uni student). Even Brisbane, the nearest major city, requires return flights for a weekend away and when you factor in all the other costs involved it's a luxury I can rarely afford. Given that I still have two years of my degree to go moving isn't currently an option either, so I basically have to keep telling myself to suck it up and deal. Given that it's quite likely I could end up in an even smaller and more remote place after I finish uni, it's good practice for that possibility (even in that case though I will still be happier in general... having lived in the same place for most of my life I am very much looking forward to leaving it behind, exploring new opportunities and starting a new chapter. Hopefully, however, some of those opportunities will also include new adventures of a sexual nature).

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  Quoting 'sir_stir' Forget anything more serious, just meeting friends can be an issue.... - Posted from rhpmobile Can relate to that. Being a single, child-free, female, full time uni student in her 30s makes me quite the anomaly in this family-oriented town and meeting people I can spend time with socially is not easy at all. Most of my elderly clients have much more exciting social lives than I do, quite pathetic really...

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  I'm in a regional city. I have found from the locals I have contacted: first that they are much more likely to respond, but less likely to play with other locals due to concerns about being discreet. So I also attempt to contact those from Melbourne, depending on what suburb, anywhere from 60min to 90 mins away. So far in three months I have only managed to play at paid events, found through this site or others (eg swingers or other such managed events, typically as part of groups). However I have had one offer to play privately (again a group), but she/they are not planning another meet until the new year.

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  Groups are less likely to invite people from out of town, as they often believe such invitees will be less likely to actually turn up or be on time. This I have found is either just a perception, but sometimes is from actual past experience. For myself, I make all efforts to attend a play meet, even using white lies to my employer/s as to why I need to get in to or stay in Melbourne at particular times :) Frankly playtime for many in the city must also fit into their often busy, scheduled lives, and so meetings must be convenient. Making arrangements to accomodate the needs and time availability of someone from out of town, is probably seen as an inconvenience they don't have the time or energy for. Sometimes they state they want the opportunity for "quickies", something I would not be prepared for or able to travel in for. Personally, I would travel in for either a special event (as I do) or a private meet of at least a few hours/all day/overnight, which is probably a very rare opportunity.

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  just opened a profile on another site, which has you specify your location by suburb rather than city. It's amazing how many contacts I'm getting from people who are obviously just assuming that I'm in Brisbane (apparently the postcode isn't giving it away either)

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  yep I hear ya....in shepp all of my mates are married and playing happy families, and they never seem to want to go pay pool at the pub or go to the rsl even for any social outings...I can understand that; they don't need to...but as a single male; like with your situation; going for a day trip in the 4wd with them - as I'd never take my measly SS dunny door off road - for a bbq in the hills isn't entirely conducive to meeting eligible bachelorettes, unless they're kangaroos or emus....lol - Posted from rhpmobile

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