F57
Is it wrong to be mad?
July 16 2014
Comments
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RHP User
11 years ago
Nobody should put pics up that aren't theirs, you should also report him. Who know's whose picture he is using, it is fraud just like using someone else's name or personal details.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Agree with Ralf, it would be a dealbreaker for me. I'm very sorry to hear about your mum, Wiccan. Big hug, wishing you lots of strength and support. x
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MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
No one can tell you how to feel, when and where. Grief and Loss is a horrible thing to go through...many stages and anger is one of them. I am sorry as well, to hear about your mum. xx What that man did was pure deceit, in my eyes planned infact cause he knew what he was doing. Wither you tell him or not is your choice. Foxy xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
My deepest condolences on your loss I hope you have a strong support network to help you with this. Yes, you have every right to be angry. I suppose that some of us, to some extent, have face pics that aren't exactly how we look all of the time. (I know if I put a pic up of how I look right now after a long, hard day at work most people would go heading for the hills), but to use a face pic that isn't you at all is just plain lying. No matter what his motive was, it makes you wonder what other lies he has been telling you.
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RHP User
11 years ago
But I'm not going to tell you that you how angry to feel; nor if you should even be angry. They are your feelings miss Wiccan and you're entitled to feel them. However...... What I would be asking is why HIS piss poor attitude should have such an effect on your happy go lucky persona?? After all; you were only chatting to him - by your own admission - for a little human contact and help for him. You've showed a compassionate shoulder not a guarantee to take it to the bedroom. :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I have good and bad days but I have wonderful friends who are available at a moments notice for anything from a chat to a night out. One friend keeps asking how he can help and all I can tell him is there's nothing he can do unless he can bring my mum back, even for just 10 minutes so I can have one last hog and know it's the last hug (she gave the best hugs). I'm also looking forward to the meet and greet in Melbourne. I've told this guy that he's being dishonest and is only making people doubt him and not trust him by having a fake profile and he's taken the picture down now. And yes, no one can tell me how I should feel but right at this point in my life I think I'm just over sensitive to some situations and have my guard up before reacting.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I am so sorry to hear that your mum passed away.. Hugs to you....so difficult when you are feeling vulnerable to have this happen...you were being kind to someone and then discovered that they were a fake....you have every right to feel angry...but unfortunately that is the nature of the internet....anyone can reinvent themselves.... just take care of you wiccan xQ
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RHP User
11 years ago
Nothing wrong with getting angry over this. Firstly, the guy sounded dodgy and he brought it on himself. If he lied at the get go, it was only going to get worse. Secondly, grief can be overwhelming some times and you need to be able to let it express itself without feeling embarrassed or ashamed. I always found crying to be very therapeutic because it releases endorphins. You will feel the sharpness of the grief for some time to come, but the edge does dull, eventually. Until then, use the support of people you can trust to help you through. I wish you happier days, and better men, for your future.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I am really sorry to hear about your loss, I know what a difficult time this must be for you. (((big hugs))) And yeah, you are definitely reacting more strongly or more negatively than you normally would, which is totally understandable. I would give this dude the flick though as he isn't being honest or maybe he has a valid reason for what he has done and doesn't realise that he shouldn't be using another persons picture........ you would be surprised what people feel is okay when they are new to the whole online thing. But don't give him any more of your energy because he simply isn't worth it. Look after yourself. xxx
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Seachange73
11 years ago
My deepest condolences for your loss. the pain of this loss is unimaginable for those who have not loss someone so close. I feel for you. Please take time to grieve and find your place after the loss and may you have the support of the people around you to talk about your grief and share your feelings with. As per above posts, you do have a right to feel as you have. Why not. I just discovered another man from Perth I was chatting to and he was going to Sydney for the swingers meet this weekend and has posted on the forum for this meet. I called out his pic as fraudulent as I found that his pic was of a gay maile American Athlete and model. I told him that it is not his pic, he denied it and still wanted to meet with me in Perth. No way. I reported him. If only he admitted it was not his, and told me the reason behind it and he was gonna take it down. But he did not want to. I blocked him. Anyway, he did take it down after a few weeks (maybe the mods told him to). I suggest that if you are feeling angry, maybe take some time off to let thing settle as you may say things you dont mean. This may just avoid unnecessary stress on you and whomever. A suggestion only. Take care sweet. Big hugs.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Sorry for your loss,been there it's a hard time of life,we all have to deal with losing family ,friends It's part of our journey!don't let fools drag u down ,getting mad compounds things! Chillax for awhile ,spoil yourself,try to take your mind off it,time heals all wounds xxx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Losing a parent is one of the most devastating experiences that a person can go through, my deepest sympathies go out to you and your family in this difficult time. In regards to your question, I don't think that it's wrong for you to be very angry with this guy. He has knowingly put a fake picture on his profile and by starting the relationship off with deception, it will be very difficult for you to be able to trust anything he says or does in the future. That being said, I don't think that he is worth either your time or your energy and my advice would be to move on. I would imagine that there would always be some doubt in the back of your mind as to whether or not he is being totally honest with you, and I think that it is important now more than ever to surround yourself with people that you know you can trust. Once again, my deepest sympathies. Mr R_T
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RHP User
11 years ago
My sincere condolences on the loss of your Mum.This turkey seems to be a complete waste of time. You must know better than me how many men are on this site, you're spoilt for choice so find some genuine.Recent publicity has shown that some of the men who cruise these sites will stop at nothing to get what they want!
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RHP User
11 years ago
I echo everyone else, hugs... Hp xo💋 Because you're worth it...
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Hottie1
11 years ago
Wiccan, my condolences first and foremost xxoo. I too have recently been deceived on this site and I wanted to write in the forums, so thank you for raising it. I have spoken to a couple of men here and only 1 of the four I have spoken to has been the real deal, exactly as their profile has stated. I invest time chatting to only discover they are not a couple, they are not the age they say and they do not match their description in their profile.My anger stems from the fact that as an intelligent woman, I was duped by some idiots who lied (I hate liars). So I have taken advice from forumites on RHP from previous topics and my guard is up. You have a right to be angry at his deception. Take careMary xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
I can't imagine how you're feeling, and you have a lot on your plate. I think I'm a lone voice on here but I'd be reasonably forgiving. He didn't want his real life persona mixed up with his online one... Fair enough. You say he is a bit lost in the online thing and that you wanted to help him. It sounds like his deception is a symptom of that. He did tell you the truth before you got into any real life stuff/friendship so I'd cut him some slack. You are right though, he should have had a real pic in his pg and a non identifier as a cover pic.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Emotions are running high for you at this time. When another loses their integrity with you, it rocks the very foundation of trust. It is unlikely the foundation of this friendship will ever be solid..btw ~ Who was the picture of? And did he have their consent?
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RHP User
11 years ago
This is one of the reasons I like forums. It can be a big of a sounding board and, when there are a great mix of forum posters I'm here, there's support when needed. Thank you xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
To Block is to love to love is to block so love the man and block the fucka its only love and thats fair .:-)) - Posted from rhpmobile
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