Is being ill a common excuse..?

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  why people make plans with no intention of keeping them, just baffles me. In saying that though I have had a couple of times where I have had to change shifts at work or the kids have screwed me over with what they are doing, I really dislike saying I am going to do something then don't do it.

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  luvsilver

  11 years ago

  I think that a lot of the time it is just an excuse that has been made up as they may be too nervous to turn up. Sometimes the reality of the situation kicks in and overtakes their fantasy they had playing in their mind .They really had no intention of meeting from the start.The flip side of the coin is that things do come up.A slight cold /cough or feeling unwell may be fine to go to sport or work with but if it is an arranged play date with someone new then it is probably a good idea not to be in close contact with anyone else. I know i would feel that way.We have both cancelled a meet and been cancelled on .It is part of the lifestyle but we really hate having to change plans as Ralf indicated also. Mr Luvsilver

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  I've never been stood up though, so I can't help with this question.

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  a few... food poisoning and in hospital was one. And another recently just a no show with no cancelation message.😡 It's really disrespectful and plain rude. Hard to know though if they are actually ill or not without producing a medical certificate 😘 - Posted from rhpmobile

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  Hottie1

  11 years ago

  With kids we have to plan in advance. Two times I've cancelled and definitely had follow up play dates. Both times revolved around our children, legitimate reasons, but I make it clear, my children come first before anything else. If you don't understand that, then we are not for you :) Mary and Andy xx

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  When timing meets inclination..perhaps they aren't sick,but they could be feeling less than enthusiastic...life often just gets in the way..don't take it personally,it's annoying and disappointing but phttt xxFreya

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  Ag4mg92 - we completely understand that and that has been the case a few times.. Never fret over that and we'd never be comfortable being put above anyone's kids but the specific circumstance is people who cancel with the excuse that someone is feeling ill,lol. Freya, agreed and understood. Not taking it personally.. Just wondering if this was a common thing. We've only been stood up a few times and that particular excuse has always been used. - Posted from rhpmobile

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  I think being ill,is just an easy excuse if there is something else going on.If people don't message.or message at the very last minute,well that is just plain rude.People get cold feet,sometimes a persons energy is just low,work and family pressures etc.............The most gobsmackingly awful excuse I have had,was from a man who told me his best friend had been killed in a car accident and he had to go and look after the man's family....One year down the track ,he contacted me again but he didn't remember our previous contact...when I reminded him he denied it was him,but I would never forget an excuse like that,or the person who used it..xxFreya

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  But I would believe them if it was. I find it's always best to err on the side of trust and handle it positively :) if you are meant to meet them you will when the time is right 😇💕 Xxviolet

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  I like to take people's word for it, but sometimes my gut will tell me something is off. Also, some people just really suck at lying. ;-) I cancelled once because of illness, the morning of a date. I actually took a pic of my thermometer showing 39.4, just in case I felt I wasn't believed... I feel a bit silly, looking back.

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  I love how you are so genuine... But if someone was really suspicious and negative they'd probably accuse of using an old pic, getting it off the internet or photoshopping. I really think the way people respond to excuses tells you so much about their personality :) Have a lovely 2015 Xxviolet

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  Quoting 'luvsilver' I think that a lot of the time it is just an excuse that has been made up as they may be too nervous to turn up....The flip side of the coin is that things do come up. We have both cancelled a meet and been cancelled on .It is part of the lifestyle but we really hate having to change plans as Ralf indicated also. Same on all accounts. I think there's probably a fake 'excuse' for every genuine one, but even at such a high strike rate it's still worth giving them the benefit of the doubt. It tends to play itself out when you don't hear from them a week or two down the track. On the occasion or two I've postponed due to not being 100% (or close enough), I've kept close contact to let them know I'm still keen, and suggested an alternative playdate as soon as possible! Mr Tryst

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  On_Safari

  11 years ago

  The first excuse he gave was his best friend's child had died in an accident. Being a parent I was totally supportive of his being unable to meet and due to his compassion and running to his mate's side on the Goldie to be there for them just attracted me more. Strange thing was he was still constantly, during this time of mourning; on RHP. 3 weeks later we arranged another meet, I was given the address and then the morning of our "date" he txt to say his Mother had died. (You see where I'm going with this hey?) Gave him the benefit of the doubt and let it be. A week later he contacted me again wanting to meet. I went for a drive to the address I was given, which didn't exist in any of the nearby suburbs either. My last response to him was, "I don't think we should see each other at all, I'd hate for someone else to die because of it." 😳 And you guys think you have it hard......😏

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  RHP User

  11 years ago

  He wasn't dying to meet you😊...yeah,yeah I know,I am terrible Muriel xxFreya

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