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RHP

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I love you too!

June 01 2010

This weekend marked the anniversary of my fathers death. A man I adored, loved and cared very much about, a truly wonderful man. I remember visiting him every day in hospital, each time I left I told him I loved him. Something that we both did not say to each other often but we knew. One night leaving the hospital I thought I forgot to say it tonight, and went to turn around to go back but decided to leave it until the next day. The next day I received a call from the nurse to come down as there was not much time left. I drove like a maniac and probably broke every road rule to see him, but he passed 10mins before I arrived. I was devasted and regret not turning around the night before. I promised I would never leave something as simple as saying I love you until the last minute, birthdays, goodbyes, anniversaries etc again. I know some people say it too much mainly in new love, which is probably really just lust, that it has no real meaning except possibly relieving insecurities. But once all has settled and you are in a stable relationship after some months, your family, your close friends, do we really say it enough??? Even if they know by gestures, appreciation, support etc, it is nice to say and it is nice to hear especially when completely random and not routine. Some, even in marriages have a fear of intimacy and have trouble saying it and expressing love, they build walls to protect from hurt and rejection of previous experiences. Leading to lonliness, unhappiness, and then relationship breakdown. Everyone gets hurt in life, as a child, an adult and the elderly. It's life! Building walls just denies yourself the happiness you deserve, wonderful expereinces and frankly your just hurting yourself constantly. STOP!!!! Break the cycle and let someone in, love yourself, love another and be loved. Get what help you need, be honest with yourself and your partner/friends/family, and enjoy every moment. People can get so caught up in their routines, work, family etc and just forget something as simple as "I love you". If you love some one tell them, even if they are covered in dirt from the garden, just crawled out of bed with their hair sticking up , it doesn't matter. There is no special day, special dress code, special event that it applies to, but it certainly makes someone very very special. Tomorrow may never come, live for today. xxMiss_Honeyxx << Declaring national tell someone you love them week now open!

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Comments

  • bondage_reality

    bondage_reality

    16 years ago

    hows that work for bricklayers n plasterers...they build walls for a living

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Thanks missy. Hugs Gazza

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    never have i heard a truer word this is something I think most people including myself just take for granted ,time to go find mum and tell her that i love her with loving thanks colt

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    In a similar vein - I got news this morning that a friend in Ireland had passed away. I got the news not via a phoen call , but via someone else updating his facebook status. It's a sad world we live in when we subtitute online communication as the only method of communication. To those around you that you love, tell them that, give them a hug... yes even the guys. I myself had a bad brush 2 weeks back that required my son to call 000 for me... was very scarey indeed. i'm over it now, but it did indeed make me think so very much about the words you've written here... Thanks for taking the moment to post this and make this forum oh so much more than a dating/sex/whatever thing Take care Wayne xxxx

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  • Frankiesgame

    Frankiesgame

    16 years ago

    Great post, as always missy xx

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Its been over 20 yrs since the passing of my mother one week after i returned from interstate didn't even have my stuff unpacked. I never got that chance to say those three magic little words I LOVE YOU and over the years on the date of her passing light a candle and say them to her as i know she is with me .The opportunity to say we care or love someone should never be missed We all love but many are incapable of telling the others in our lives our feelings.I share your losses and say a prayer for you all.regards and love Profataka Chris

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Since my mum passed away...... I helped my dad nurse her for 6 months prior. I was at her bedside, as was my dad, and my sister. I grew up in a home where my parents told each other 3 or 4 times a day that they loved each other..... It is something I do in my relationships as well!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    .my dad live in merredin @3half hours drive east of perth. he drove down for the day to watch my brothers's dragon boat regatta , as he loved to do so often. it was a sunday and mr.c and i were going to go xmas shoppping withour friends who also new my dad and had been up to stay with him with us one time. we decided to call in to the regatta for a few hours that day. my dad was really happy and looked good, for a 51yr old man enjoying the country life. my mum also was there with her partner at the time and everyone seemed happy. my mums younger two brothers were there, who loved my dad and grew up at our house on weekends, and they and their wives got to spend the day with him also. lots and lots of other random relatives and family friends came to dragon boat that day. they had a great day with my dad. later in the afternoon he left for the drive home as a big storm was rolling in. driving thru mahogany creek in the hills his car aquaplained and slid off the road. he died instantly. i never saw him again. he never met my 3 gorgeous kids or was at our wedding. a few weeks before he died he told me on the phone that he loved me and mr.c. it was very special for me as he had never said that about him before .. i try to tell my kids and my husband i love them every day, as many times in the day as i can... that was dec 1999... he was a wonderful father.. ms.c

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    I remember all the special times that Mrs and I have spent with her parents before we sadly lost them. Both were special to us. Mrs spent many days looking after them, running erands and making sure they knew how much they were loved. We opened our home to "Nan" when "Pa" left us and she lived with us in a house way too small. For us it was about spending quality time with someone special. The kids were able to spend time with and get to know their grandparents before it was too late. Too many of their sibblings were worried about what they were doing with their money. (Inheritance) In the end then money does not matter... we were able to spend specail time with them prior to losing them and now we have just the best memories. Mrs Av and I have now been married for over 26 yrs and still to this day make sure we not only tell each other how much we love and respect each other but also do the little things that "display" that we mean it... even if it is only a foot rub or a cup of tea. For us it is one thing to say it but another to actually "show" it. To all those who have lost loved ones we offer our hugs and understanding... Mr and Mrs Av. xoxo

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    My father died on my sisters wedding day of a stroke. I was 17 here is a tribute i made to him for the 28th year of his death. Make sure you tell those around you how much you love them everyday. I had a fight with him the day before and never got to say sorry. I share this with all my rhp friends and hope you respect it and can see it alright. Leesa http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000814971780&v=app_2392950137#!/video/video.php?v=111343098902855

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Quoting 'quickNwitty' this is an ADULT SEX site not a memorandum post board, so unless she cant read i'm guessin her relationship with her dad was a lil Tooooo Close? Why else would anyone place such comments on here? Shows how warped somepeoples minds are to What is RIGHT & What is WRONG. Unless I have severly misunderstood you post. It would be a good time to point out two things a) You are a Grade A Fuckwit b) You need to change your handle, because you are neither. Now fuck off and get some of that sex on offer here.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Quoting 'Jean_Girard' Quoting 'quickNwitty' this is an ADULT SEX site not a memorandum post board, so unless she cant read i'm guessin her relationship with her dad was a lil Tooooo Close? Why else would anyone place such comments on here? Shows how warped somepeoples minds are to What is RIGHT & What is WRONG. Unless I have severly misunderstood you post. It would be a good time to point out two things a) You are a Grade A Fuckwit b) You need to change your handle, because you are neither. Now fuck off and get some of that sex on offer here.Well said mate... thank you...

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Quoting 'quickNwitty' this is an ADULT SEX site not a memorandum post board, so unless she cant read i'm guessin her relationship with her dad was a lil Tooooo Close? Why else would anyone place such comments on here? Shows how warped somepeoples minds are to What is RIGHT & What is WRONG. it isnt just a sex site dumbarse...who are you to say what should and shouldnt be posted on a thread how dare you imply something nasty to be going on between this lovely lady and her father quicknwitty....if you have nothing nice to say ....FUCK OFF keep your nasty fuckin thoughts to yourself roxxy

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Brave of you to bear your feeling and your soul. You make a very good point of letting people in! Thanks!

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Its so true Ms Honey. We just seem to take things for granted everyday. Sometimes I think about if tommorrow is my last day, who would I call up right now and say goodbye to? Thanks for the reminder, guess I have a bit of catching up to do tonight! And I will do it tonight. 'QuicknShitty' (this will be your new handle) - you are not a fuckwit. You are just a wasted sperm.

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    when i was little my nan was the type of nan that gave us ice cream for lunch and made us cakes and cookies she was the little old lady that you see in the movies....she would have to have been the best nan ever a few years ago she found out she was dying and when she got really sick she was put in hospital so i use to go up and visit every day some days id take my kids some days i wouldnt ( i didnt want them to see her like that)....some days i use to hate going up there...the nurses would tell everyone to leave the room cause nan had to go to the loo, but she would insist i stayed and talked to her or if she thought that the nurses were'nt brushing her teeth properly she would make me do it...ewwww...lol...ya know some things a grandchild just dont need to see haha then one day my brother and i were sitting there while she was sleeping...when she woke she looked at me and said "its about time you took this" and handed me her wedding ring...she hadnt taken it off in all the time id been around..my pop has been dead since i was 9 the next day when i arrived with my little son my poor great aunty was in a tizz thinking someone had stolen nans ring...nan hadnt been awake the whole time my aunty had been there...then one by one everybody arrived and left so there was only me and my boy sitting there with her my biggest fear was i would be alone when she went so to be honest i was packing shit lol ten to twelve my aunty walked in the room and by twelve my nan was gone i like to think she waited for someone to be there with me...but i think maybe thats wishful thinking haha nice post Miss Honey.... roxxy xxx

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Oh i've been rather bored with the posts of late, can't complain as I haven't added anything spectacular either. So Thank you Miss Honey, what a great, heart felt post. You have really summed up so much about life in one little post. For me, my old man was taken suddenly and out of the blue with no time for goodbyes let alone coming to terms with it all. Now he wasn't the best father in the world but he did his best. There was so much more we had to share which will never happen. I actually spoke to him a few weeks before he went and he sounded quite down with the world but I was with friends and didn't have the time. Life happens while we're stuffing around and sometimes moments pass that we can never grasp hold of again. You're right about the walls and we all should take the time for a bit of self analysis to find where the walls exist, then we can pick up a sledge hammer and get to work.Love ya work Honeyand love you Dad

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Thanks for who ever got Quicks negative post pulled, but the quotes still remain lol, but glad they did. In response to you Quick. The post was not a "memorandum"(sic) post board. It was my example, feelings etc, that I think people get so caught up that they forget to say "I love you" enough, to the ones that are special to us until it is too late. Often "I love you" is said at birthdays, valentines day etc but not spontaneous random moments throughout the year. Love shown is often implied by what you do for each other, which is basically a role with duties attached. Father = breadwinner, provider, protector etc = love, for example. It is a routine, and one, with also the person undertaking the role, that becomes quickly taken for granted. My example of my fathers death to highlight my point, is that I took for granted there would be another day. Another day that he would be here, another day to hold me up if I fell, another day to listen if I was sad, another day to stop any hurt, another day to encourage....another day to for me say "I love you"....another day that will now never come. Routines needs to be broken, show someone how much they mean to you and how you appreciate them, practice random acts of kindness and never forget to say "I love you" and mean it. Not the "I love you" yelled back from the front door while your texting your boss your late, and grabbing your things. It is also as routine as your role and can lose its meaning just the same as saying it too much. I am talking about undivided attention, eye contact, touching, no special occassion, random, spontaneous, you mean the world to me, stop and listen "I LOVE YOU". That's the one not said enough, put off or just forgotten. I take it Quick from your silly thoughtless remarks, that you probably don't hear it that often even in the most simple form? Just go stick another brick in your wall, and seal your tomb of lonliness. xx Miss_Honeyxx <

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    For your sharing, for your reminders that love is a gift, as is time, and that neither should be taken for granted. WTG

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    At the start of the year I lost a very good friend, one who had been in my life since we started Grade Prep together in 1972! During the last couple of years of her life we didn't have a lot of contact, but we seemed to connect at moments that gave us time to share our memories. In May last year she rang me when I was a half hour drive from her parents house (and she had just come down from Townsville). I had time to visit, even though she was tired from the chemo she was having. Then in November I rang her out of the blue to see how she was going. Funny time to ring, for she had just come down to Melbourne again that morning and it was to be her last visit home. The day I rang was Melbourne Cup eve, and I got to visit her to say goodbye that day, and to tell her I loved her. To everyone who has lost someone dear to them, I send a hug and a reminder that they will always be with us in our hearts and our minds. xxILTS

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Thanks for all the heartfelt stories shared and kind words. It is (awkwardly) comforting, if that is the right way to put it, that I am not the only one that can be neglectful. It left me with regrets and a big hole that can't be filled. It is what provoked me to write the thread. I am so glad that the gentle reminder, may help people to appreciate what people have in front of them everyday and to remember to express their gratitude especially with those three little words. Have a fantastic day everyone. xx Miss_Honeyxx

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Peachy I thanked "whoever" because I didn't know "whoever" I hadn't read your post, I went straight into replying to the comment. As for the option of leaving quotes??? Never reported anyone so wouldn't know. I thought it was odd they remained. GEESH!!! ...catches her breath for another justification....I noticed you were the one responsible this morning when I read the rest of the posts, but as I had to go to WORK, I wrote a quick note of thanks to all, and planned to make further comment this evening when I had more time, which would have included you!!! Peachy I do not have the luxury of spending all day in the forums, I have a very busy work schedule and it comes BEFORE the forums. My absence from the forums should justify that. Sorry I am just not on your timetable. You can hang onto the mortar, I think you need it a little more then me. End of justification, end of discussion! xxMiss_Honeyxx ... waits

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Rox: All good, no stress. Remember breathe in and then out, then go get a piece of choccie cake. Bondy: You spanner! But your a good mate and me loves you..well sometimes teehee. Frankie: Where the hell you been?? Me misses U! xxx Stalky: The angle of me puter, your piccie looks like you a seriously sussing out Colts bot bot Forum Cleanup Crew: Fankies peeps for taking the trash out and disinfecting the area. Some just enjoy spoiling threads. Puppy: Ya always say the sweetest fings to me (flutters eyelashes), gets me in my gooey spot every time. Agree with ya sledgehammer comment, perhaps Quick can take note, instead of setting an example of how negative, bitter, twisted, sad and lonely one can become. Tassie: Spot on..its a gift hun. Again to all the lovely peeps who shared, remembered, hugged and kissed...Thank U! Play nice in the sandpit of LoVe! xxMiss_Honeyxx <<

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    16 years ago

    Lovely post ........ never miss an opportunity to tell them you love them. Thankyou

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    Yeah I don't use the L word lightly unless I mean it but I've really come to known this guy for as long as I remember, I want to tell him I do love him. It's totally MFEO and a lot people I know see it and at first it was like I keep denying it but now I've woken up but if I say it would it destroy what we have because I don't want to lose we have got right now because it just means to much to me !

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  • RHP

    RHP User

    15 years ago

    I build a wall to protect myself from the guy who just want to use me then I get recycled. As of recent I've knocked my walls down I don't know I think he got a sledge hammer and knocked them down. Which has me frustrated because now I don't know where its all is heading - I go to say it but I can't say it - I want them to say it first. By the way the film I love you too !!! that was awesome good aussie hit that i've been waiting for. I cried, laughed then cried again.

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