F48
How many people can you be in-love with at one time!
April 05 2011
Comments
-
RHP User
15 years ago
Someone wise and messy with some experience in this once said "Of course you can love two (or more) people. Parents do it all the time" . I know that's not 'intimately', but it shows that love can be shared... And I believe you can love two people intimately, but it would be tremendously difficult to find three personalities that sync enough to do so... Invariably there needs to be some sort of pecking order and everyone would need to be comfortable with their 'place' in it. I like the thought of it... imagine giving and receiving love from two or three or four people. You'd have to be quite the fucking juggler though! . I just re-read that, and I am obv. taking this from a polyamorous angle where the three people are actually connected directly. If the question is "Can you love two people intimately, but completely separately and without their knowledge of Person B and C" then I don't think so. Because unless you are aiming for the polyamorous utopia in paragraph 2, you know you are going to hurt one of them eventually, and you wouldn't set someone you love up for that sort of fall.
-
RHP User
15 years ago
I think it's absolutely possible to love more than one person and really we all do but specifically talking about having two "lovers" that you love equally then I think that there's a lot of issues that will most often break something somewhere. As if one person loves two and the two others don't have the same love for each other then someone's going to feel left out somewhere. As far as loving more than one person to the same depth but in different roles then of course it's possible. I love some family and a few very special friends just as deeply as I do Mrs Pup but in ways that are not detrimental to my relationship.
-
RHP User
15 years ago
Love does not limit itself. The heart can grow and expand to include many. We can love them all equally but differently. How else does a mother love more than one of her children? If it is only possible to love one person at a time, what happens if that one you love dies? You go on to love again, it is different but the love for the first does not just dissappear. You dont stop loving them because they are gone.
-
RHP User
15 years ago
I absolutely believe you can love more than one person intimately, and i have, but.....and there's always a proviso isn't there. and here's the kicker, and the kicker is equality ...and no.....at least not for me.....there will always be a rankingof absolute importance.For me, she with the absolute importance is Kj........and I just couldn't imagine life without her.So for me I am always aware of her feelings......and if she's not happy, nor am I.Though seeing as we have some 30 years of history and shared moments together and our sons , I guess its hardlysurprising.Curiously when we both first knew each other we actively disliked each other.........from the fires of passion the pheonix arose.Cheers Nev.....as a parting gift to this topic I would reference ...Rammsteins song Ohne Diche.
-
RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'puppy'I think it's absolutely possible to love more than one person and really we all do but specifically talking about having two "lovers" that you love equally then I think that there's a lot of issues that will most often break something somewhere. As if one person loves two and the two others don't have the same love for each other then someone's going to feel left out somewhere. As far as loving more than one person to the same depth but in different roles then of course it's possible. I love some family and a few very special friends just as deeply as I do Mrs Pup but in ways that are not detrimental to my relationship. True equality does not exist in this world, and no two things are truly identical - whether its love or pieces of paper. Someone will always be missing out, no matter how hard we try to avoid it. "Love is suspicious, love is needy, love is fearful, love is greedy. My friends, there is no great love without great jealousy." It may have come from a cartoon robot, but I think that about sums it up.
-
RHP User
15 years ago
Of course you can be in love with 2 people at once, that is how i live.My husband and my boyfriend we have been together and living together for over 2 years now..and it is wonderful.Polyamory.Leesa
-
RHP User
15 years ago
as many as i want
-
RHP User
15 years ago
Intimacy is one of many emotions in being 'truly in love' . If thats the emotion driving the relationship(s)...then i think you can be truly in love(intimate) with more than one person... But if all emotions come into play from both sides...i cant see it working ! Wouldnt it become a competion, or a constant comparison... not too sure! As mentioned above by GT...one heart, one love... so right!! But each to their own...we all have different beliefs and feelings when it comes to true love...and thats what makes up the rollercoaster of love...
-
RHP User
15 years ago
ah here we go...mothers love more than one? not even related to the question. "intimate" love is not "maternal" love, not by any shakes. yes people can love more than one 'intimately" at the same time, but it takes a very special person to do so.
-
RHP User
15 years ago
Yes, I beleive it is possible to love 2 people at the one time, but the thing that comes to my mind is, is it real love for both or just a comfortable situation for the one recieving the best of both worlds. Mind you, if it was me in that position , I too would be feeling like its the greatest thing ever when it gets as good as that..Mrs JJ being 1 of 3 sisters once said to me she wouldnt mind if one of her sisters shared our home and bed, which by the way never happened. But I know she was serious , and didnt see it as anything so wrong , so I wonder if there are as many people with her attitude that have taken that step and added either a friend or family member. Im sure we're not the only one to come across this situation..The other thing that comes to my mind is how long would it last.. Anyone married couple or singles who have been in a long term relationship know that the stardust gradully floats away after awhile even though you still love the person you're with. So yes' I definately come to the conclusion like others have said.. There would have to be a pecking order, otherwise it could become a lil untidy.. Mr JJ
-
RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'MrsPeachypear63' The one I got is enough complication for me lol. Think I'll put my efforts into making that one relationship work... Mrs Peachy I'm with you..... its the best if, when you come home, its to the 'one' you love. we put all our energies into what we have, and its the best we've ever known as a result.......
-
RHP User
15 years ago
No Problems here. *grabs fender*I gotta whole lotta love... reeeeowwwww! ......You need coolin', baby, I'm not foolin' I'm gonna send ya back to schoolin' Way down inside, a-honey, you need it I'm gonna give you my love I'm gonna give you my love, ohWanna whole lotta love Wanna whole lotta love Wanna whole lotta love Wanna whole lotta love You've been learnin' And baby, I been learnin' All them good times Baby, baby, I've been discernin'-a A-way, way down inside A-honey, you need-a I'm gonna give you my love, ah I'm gonna give you my love, ahetc...really, there's no limit once you accept that you have fallen in love with the second "one".HugsStalky
-
RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'stalky' No Problems here. *grabs fender*I gotta whole lotta love... reeeeowwwww! ......You need coolin', baby, I'm not foolin' I'm gonna send ya back to schoolin' Way down inside, a-honey, you need it I'm gonna give you my love I'm gonna give you my love, ohWanna whole lotta love Wanna whole lotta love Wanna whole lotta love Wanna whole lotta love You've been learnin' And baby, I been learnin' All them good times Baby, baby, I've been discernin'-a A-way, way down inside A-honey, you need-a I'm gonna give you my love, ah I'm gonna give you my love, ahetc...really, there's no limit once you accept that you have fallen in love with the second "one".HugsStalky it was a Gibson "Les Paul" .......... a Fender on "stairway to heaven" .......lol... sorry dude, but guitar is a life long love of mine..
-
RHP User
15 years ago
Yes and i come home to the 2 i love...it may be hard to imagine how it works but it does.Leesa
-
RHP User
15 years ago
How long is a piece of string?Providing everyone is happy why bother counting?
-
RHP User
15 years ago
In my opinion, No. One would be love and the other possibly lust. I love and adore Mr Sensual with all my heart, however I do not feel this way about my FB. If I ever did, I'd end it. They are two very different people and whilst I enjoy them both for different reasons, I will only ever be 'in love' with my husband. couplesint - I'm loving your living arragements!
-
RHP User
15 years ago
I think in denying the feelings that can develop for others, and the potential for falling in love with more than one person (both at the same time with 2 or more people or over the course of a lifetime) we deny ourselves so many amazing (and admittedly, not so amazing) experiences. Life is for living and learning, not restricting! It frustrates me to no end those people who enter into "extra curricular" activities who, for example, don't kiss their FB because it's too "intimate", or guys who won't go down on girls because that's reserved for their partners... FFS! I'm not saying that every relationship will end up going down that path; rather, I'm saying don't FEAR it if it does! I guess the main thing that needs to happen though in order for these types of things to work is honesty, and the setting of clear expectations from the outset with those you enter into relationships with about the direction you both want things to go. It sounds strange advocating honesty on a site like this, where a lot of people aren't necessarily! Lol but I think it's important. As for how many people you can fall in love with at once - can you really put a number on it? Again that's restricting yourself! But I do believe the main qualities of love would ensure that it wouldn't be a huge number, as emotionally I don't think anyone could invest enough time and effort to maintain those kinds of relationships without going insane. Lol
-
RHP User
15 years ago
Like anything in life that you "spread yourself thinnly" over, the possibility for unfavourable outcome increases correspondingly due to limited availability for one or the other. Although good in theory, in the end, may realise just one love or the failings of both and the merits of neither.
-
Mr_MrsJones
15 years ago
We are conditioned pretty much from birth to think that monogamy is THE way to live. ALL of our pop culture is about monogamy. I challenge anyone to cite a best selling book, movie or song that celebrates multiple sexual partners or even life partners as something that is achievable and desirable. Always there is a subtext that this is not going to work and someone, somewhere in the script has a relationship failure that is accredited to the non-monogamy. I love Leesa's attitude and love seeing how happy she is with her men. My answer is YES, YES, YES you can love two people at the same time in the same way. I believe that it can go WAY past the sex and it can last for more than short term. BUT (yes there is always a but) it is not a bed of roses, like all relationships there will be ups and downs. There will have to be relationship maintenance like you would put into any successful relationship. The more people involved the more complicated it will be. But like anything in life. The more effort involved the greater the rewards.
-
RHP User
15 years ago
To do so requires the knowledge that loving isn't possessing or owning...And, to be successful requires the one's who are loved recognise the same.Of course, it is possible to love people who don't love you back, and again, as long as you don't have expectations of possession this can be lovely too.
-
RHP User
15 years ago
torn btween two lovers anyone heard that song
-
RHP User
15 years ago
I know myself (Mich) and I could not at all be truely in love with 2 people at all. And I know that I couldn't be one of two/three in a reverse situation, as I would want all the attention. I totally agree with you all that say that they think there would be problems with equality and a natural imbalance. If it works for others and they are all truely happy, I am happy for them. I just know I could not, nor would want to, feel the intimacy and love that I have for my husband, with more than anyone but him.
Boards
-
Hot Topics
Topics: 15123 Comments: 88157
-
Girls Ask
Topics: 1417 Comments: 10229
-
Guys Ask
Topics: 2521 Comments: 11672
-
Couples' Corner
Topics: 2506 Comments: 9759
-
Swingers Lifestyle
Topics: 1008 Comments: 5262
-
Fetish & Fantasy
Topics: 1303 Comments: 5776
-
Hot Travel
Topics: 782 Comments: 1988
-
LGBT
Topics: 170 Comments: 867
Forum help
-
Something related with that
-
Going somewhere & want to hook up?
-
Hasn't that topic been posted before?
RHP's popular dating tool
-
Where the heck did that topic go?
Discover what RHP is doing offline
-
RHP member's RL secrets
reply
like
Share