F37
How do you tell someone that they are bad at sex??
May 16 2011
Comments
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RHP User
15 years ago
1. Tell him straight up that he isnt doing it for you any more and you feel he would benefit from playing with someone else 2. Cut him out completly no reason no explanantion - youre just not interested anymore 3. find someone else for yourself to play with and slowly wean him off 4. Stop answering all his calls, texts, emails etf and hope he gets the message . Not an easy place to be in and I dont envy you your position but I would like ot know why it has taken you 7 months to figure out he is a dud. . Kisses Focus
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RHP User
15 years ago
Trade him in for an older more experienced model....hehehehehe
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RHP User
15 years ago
I didn't think he was that bad at the start i just thought he was shy which he. But more to the point its not getting any better.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Haha thank K
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RHP User
15 years ago
Sex is not the be all and end all of a relationship. If this is a casual thing then slowly ease away from him. If he is younger than those you usually are with then how young is he? I mean...you are only 21! If it is done slowly then he may leave with his ego intact...especially as he is shy to start with. Dont want to scar the man for life! If this is a serious committment and everything else is working BUT the sex, you may have to gradually teach him what you like. Use comments like...why dont we try this? Or maybe "this would be nice for a change". Or praise when he does hit the right spot "Oh yeah, that feels soooo good when you do that. Please dont stop" Perhaps as Focus said, suggest that it is time to be seeing others. We all know what a fragile thing the male ego can be and this is a tricky situation. Try to be tactful and not hurt his tender heart too much. The last thing we want is another woman hater out there.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Shoulda read the question more thoroughly. NSA Gradually ease away. Be busy sometimes and meet him less and less. You are 22 and not 21.
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RHP User
15 years ago
You guys must get along well enough, especially f you have been romping around for 7 months, so I can see why you are feeling unsure.. have you been taking the lead and verbalising what you want and like, as most guys are generally pretty damn happy to oblige in the bedroom? No one learns everything without help, and he is young... so either play the teacher or let him go to learn elsewhere. You can always meet up sometime later and see what you have both learned... lol!
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RHP User
15 years ago
Why do you feel the need to tell him he's bad in bed ? Really' you dont have to say anything at all . If you dont like what you're getting ( or missing out on ) Just move on and say nothing. No point in insulting his feelings just for the sake of it.Put it down to experience. At 22 Im sure you'll find more than one dud along the way... thats life
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RHP User
15 years ago
Don't let him make you feel bad for the decisions that you make. . Work out want you want. Believe it. Then go for it. . You just need a dash of assertiveness :)
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RHP User
15 years ago
tell him what you want him to do ... start the ball rolling
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RHP User
15 years ago
Geeze Focus, that's a little harsh....lol Mackay21, have you tried coaching him, just gently coach the guy, SOME! guys like to know what you want them to do, how to do it, when to do things and hold his hand, if you must and guide literally!!!! Newsflash, please please not all guys need coaching although I am guessing he is around your age and he may have not had that much experience yet...We all start somewhere... If things do not improve, yes you are 21yo gosh so much to do!!! and who to do!!! And just let it pitter out!! I think also you don't have to say Dude your are a Dud, surely you both have invested some time with eachother over 7 months, so surely you both deserve the decency to be upfront and if you do ditch him, he might just say, well why didn't you tell me what I was doing wasn't doing it for you! See, go tactfully and perhaps say, look lets try this and this and this..and at the same time you become the teacher HOT! Hope you work it out!!! Take care xxx
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RHP User
15 years ago
So maybe just go with the back away quietly theme. as others have suggested just don't be as available, tell him you just aren't in the mood what ever you need to but i wouldn't tell him he is bad in bed, it is counter productive, if he is already the shy type as you indicated then telling him he is a dud will only make him self conscious and probably worse for the next girl and really what doesn't work for you may be someone else's dream.This is a NSA deal after all so there really is no need for explanations.Just my opinion,Mrs GC
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'wowwow09'tell him what you want him to do ... start the ball rolling You absolutely kill me with your comments, they are awsome!!! See Mackay, take it from Wow, tell him but nicely!!! xxx
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RHP User
15 years ago
I'd just wean off him and find someone else. It saves you from having to tell him. He will hopefully find someone else to get the experience he needs while keeping his ego intact.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Are you 100% sure he is down with the NSA ? Sounds like he is a young lad looking for "miss perfect" to take home to meet mummy, you know the type , always wants to "make love" - not game to experiment because he is unsure how you will react, does'nt want you to think he is some type of sexual devient etc. Maybe a few drinks would help loosen him up , play with some toys , some porn of your choice to give him some ideas, kama sutra or if none of that works and its still bad you can just tell him that you are interested in someone else and dont feel comfortable carring on a NSA relationship as you dont think its fair to all parties involved.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Encouragement, Encouragement, Encouragement. Sometimes, thats all it takes... Will give him a boost, and he might 'come out of his shell abit more' as you say.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Really? How is that possible or even a remotely fair thing to say? Bear in mind that while you might be a total cockstar to a dozen guys, you can also at the same time BY DOING EXACTLY THE SAME THING be someone else's worst fuck of their lifetime. It's about individual preference.Tell him in an encouraging tone what works FOR YOU and ask him to tell you what works FOR HIM, then get to work on something together, or just get over him and yourself and move on.xx Sarah
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RHP User
15 years ago
Have you thought about trying to teach him how to do some things better rather than just dumping him? Then you can get him to do things the way YOU like it. Everyone needs to learn some time
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'brazenhussy' So is the problem that you are not a good teacher or is he a bad student? If this is just a casual play thing it's oh so important to select your prey.....erm ....lovers very, very carefully. YES YOU !
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RHP User
15 years ago
7 months? it took you that long?
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Letsgetcrazy09
15 years ago
Miss Shoes, Some of us are beyond coach me thinks..........PMSL Lets
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Letsgetcrazy09' Miss Shoes, Some of us are beyond coach me thinks..........PMSL Lets Although the couple or fbs in question are so young. Coaching could be good as long as the Coach is a good Coach. Gosh I knew nothing back then and a fb was not heard of! I am trying to be kind to the guy, he obviously thinks he is doing ok. mmm yes agree Mr Letsget! coaching (you said it!) and a little slow on the uptake of our signals...sheesh...so I have heard from your recent experience!!! MissShoes has given up lol xxx
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Letsgetcrazy09
15 years ago
Snails have more pace than the electrical pulses running around in my head at times....................hehehe
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RHP User
15 years ago
some men need more than coaching - a sledge hammer might be more successful in getting the point across . Kisses Focus
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'brazenhussy' So is the problem that you are not a good teacher or is he a bad student? If this is just a casual play thing it's oh so important to select your prey.....erm ....lovers very, very carefully. The Victim...I mean lover...selection process is a very important step...I would have to agree with you...hopefully the OP chalks this one up to experience and doesnt leave it 7 months next time to decide someone is bad in bed. . Kisses Focus
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RHP User
15 years ago
at 22..... a 'teacher' lol........ i laughed so hard i think a bit of wee came out....lol.....
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