F56
Doing things differently
September 20 2014
Comments
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RHP User
11 years ago
The opinions offered are only a fraction of the world of rhp. I prefer individuality. So no, I haven't changed myself to fit in with generic opinions.
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RHP User
11 years ago
...
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Hottie1
11 years ago
I originally posted about giving and receiving validations. I originally was against them but on that forum, it did create a fair degree of discussion but the opinions that changed my mind was that single people may find it harder in the RHP world. A validation enables you to something about a person. I have since written three, for single men we have played with. Mary xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
It's a sad world if we can't learn new things and adjust our thinking or approach as a result. Whether we learn them from books, from conversations, from experience or the forums, does it really matter? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Certain people over the years have captured my interest and have made me think and question things. They have definitely influenced me, in the sense that my mind has been broadened and opened to new experiences and to be more accepting how other people live and their kinks. I have learned a lot on RHP about things I never even knew existed a few years ago.
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RHP User
11 years ago
but I have made contact with or been contacted by some awesome people based on reading each others input here. I think using the forums as a way to learn more about people is great, it's far more dynamic than a static profile. That said, it's really disappointing when I really like the sound of someone and then click on their profile to find that they live on the east coast...
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RHP User
11 years ago
are interested in people, their sexuality,their sexual proclivities,their experiences both sexual and otherwise, how could you not learn something new....the good ,the bad,and the fantastical... Have I changed my thinking?.....yes,but sometimes I changed it back again :-) ....as for people I have connected with here,the forums have provided that opportunity ...so thank you RHPxxQ
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RHP User
11 years ago
Regardless of what some may think ' Iv'e always set my self fairly high standards and have always been that way. But Im also a firm believer you never push your opinions down others throats.. They can either take it or leave it.. Still' there are forumites I take lots of notice of because of their wise comments , where as ' there are some I just cant take seriously at all.. but thats life anyway... In saying that ' there are definitely things Ive learnt from reading what others have to say. Some things I still get surprised I never knew..
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quote If youare interested in people, their sexuality,their sexual proclivities,their experiences both sexual and otherwise, how could you not learn something new....the good ,the bad,and the fantastical... Have I changed my thinking?.....yes,but sometimes I changed it back again :-) ....as for people I have connected with here,the forums have provided that opportunity ...so thank you RHPxx Wise words indeed.. Jay...
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RHP User
11 years ago
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Tall74nHard9
11 years ago
Quoting 'Keepitsimple72' That said, it's really disappointing when I really like the sound of someone and then click on their profile to find that they live on the east coast... Doesn't do much for us poor blokes when your on the other side of the country either ..... Tall
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RHP User
11 years ago
Because, I know it All! And peachy we shall have to catch up, I feel an art gallery visit coming up. :) I learn something every day on here. Especially about myself. Yes I change my mind, it's called growing. Especially the wonderful forum folk I have had the pleasure of meeting offline. And we do not always agree on topics and had heated debate, but I have a lot to thank them for. Q especially for her great reading lists, and the hoot of a time we have when we go to Sydney. We are both growing older disgracefully
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RHP User
11 years ago
Well great topic.....ive found other sites forums suffering some pretty poor "culture". Unintelligent & unproductive - simply annoying! RHP seems different. RHP curiously retains an intellectual commentary ive not seen elsewhere. Notably; Meander, Meeka, BurningLove, Keepitsimple DeliciuosCurves, and there are just as many guys / couples too. & While i may differ from some others view points i absolutely respect theirs. And to be honest, in concert with other posts here I've actually learned from the forums. Its so unlike me to be involved in this type of communication & im still thinking that thru! I otherwise prefer to retain my cards and play them at my choosing, and while this is obviously entirely possible "here" when one becomes intertwined its - hard - ooops difficult not to show you truer self, your inner beliefs. Collectively we share some pretty deep thoughts - with who? Well with people weve maybe not met, for me generally never met. Maybe we all just love Fucking, which "bonds" us......in some way.... :-) SDx
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RHP User
11 years ago
The forums are a great eye opener for me and a learning curbe6 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I change my picture - that's about all..........oh and my mood in the forms
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RHP User
11 years ago
But you can certainly assimilate it and chew it over. Meeka taught us how to do paragraphs last week on iPads and iPhones, but now I've forgotten:(
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RHP User
11 years ago
all i ever has wanted a woman with a large strapon/ a guy to fuck me till i leaked....q
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RHP User
11 years ago
not much anymore.For us we prefer to actually meet with people and get individual thoughts and opinions. From our experience (and others we meet seem to say the same), the forums tend to attract bored people who don't get out and 'do life' and often people with incredibly intolerant and narrow views.
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RHP User
11 years ago
.... Definitely from playing with others. Playing with others have shown us both new things that we like that we may not have even considered should we have stayed within the marriage.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I have a hunch you intended to provoke people with your comment. And it just might work. Unless you've met all of the forum folk I doubt you can claim to know who does or doesn't have a life. I won't bore you with own very long list of activities that have led to a full and successful life, but I will say that I've been on the forums long enough to know that they attract all sorts: Usually people who want to talk, share, learn and laugh, and in my experience, often people with full and fascinating lives. - Posted from rhpmobile
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Tall74nHard9
11 years ago
Quoting 'LaVelvetRouge' But you can certainly assimilate it and chew it over. Meeka taught us how to do paragraphs last week on iPads and iPhones, but now I've forgotten:( Perhaps have a quick peek back and get the notes tattooed on your forearm ??? Tall
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RHP User
11 years ago
I certainly haven't changed my profile or anything, but I aim to be flexible and exploratory in as many things as possible, which means inevitably factoring in or being inspired by anything that piques my interest. Which would go for things I read on here too. So probably. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Respect your view, but disagree. On the contrary actually, regular posters often discuss events they have been to and some of the things they have gotten up to thru meeting people. This gives them personal experience to value add the dynamic. I partially agree with the narrow view point claim but again from what ive seen, those tend to come from members who post infrequently.. I do feel that the longer one participates the more aware, indeed, the more appreciative we become of the complex issues facing different member categories. Anywayz we are all entitled to our opinions. Keep up your posting :-) SD
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RHP User
11 years ago
I'm getting a bit wary of the "moral majority"
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RHP User
11 years ago
Such wariness only arises when you have a need for people to agree with your own opinion. If you're clear in your own view while at the same time open to hearing (though not always agreeing with) the views of others ... AND ... if you're willing to learn something new from time to time, then I PROMISE you you'll never feel wary. Your wariness is a reflection of your own uncertainties and insecurities. Try posting without any attachment to how people react to your post. Then you'll see that others aren't 'moral' or whatever you want to label them with. They're just people with an opinion which doesn't need to impact you at all. - Posted from rhpmobile
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rupamohan
11 years ago
Any forum has some useful info. At rhp forum is insignificant part based on members quantity and forum users are chatting community. How much such info is useful for swingers ? Make your own opinion. Forums have impacted us but impact is insignificant compared to feedback by our playmates.
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RHP User
11 years ago
The best thing about being human is that we are mobile. Therefore our thinking must be mobile and fluid like... And well..... If you know what water smells like when it's stagnant you'll know why it's best to keep changing and evolving..... No matter how bad or hard it may seem to be.... - Posted from rhpmobile
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Hottie1
11 years ago
' We do become aware of the complexity of other's lives' through the forums. A recent forum highlighted just how much trauma some forumites have had in their lives and 'that's as real as it gets'. Secondly, 'narrow mindedness' is in the eye of the beholder as far as I concerned. I don't agree with everything people say, but they are looking at it through the lens of their experience, who am I to correct that and say it's wrong, now that is narrow minded! Just like in my rich, full life outside of RHP, I take people as they come, I don't try to change them and maybe I'm a little bit selfish, I actually learn from them. I love it when passionate people can discuss at length the things they value. RHP forums are just one element of my life where that happens. At the end of the day, I get out of this what I put in.Mary xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Burning_Love' Such wariness only arises when you have a need for people to agree with your own opinion. If you're clear in your own view while at the same time open to hearing (though not always agreeing with) the views of others ... AND ... if you're willing to learn something new from time to time, then I PROMISE you you'll never feel wary. Your wariness is a reflection of your own uncertainties and insecurities. Try posting without any attachment to how people react to your post. Then you'll see that others aren't 'moral' or whatever you want to label them with. They're just people with an opinion which doesn't need to impact you at all. - Posted from rhpmobile When you categorically state things and use the word ONLY you are limiting your self.It's apparent you don't know me as well as you might think, pigeon hole me at your peril. It was more than one snide remark directed at me that made me post what I did.I could just as easily put the words " pack mentality" in the quotation marks and still meant the same thing.I have seen how some posters have been savaged by popular opinion, I find that a bit sad. Whether they deserved such treatment or not is irrelevant. Agree or disagree with me as you will and I shall care as I will.As for my confidence and insecurities...yeah yeah whatever.If you haven't trodden on some toes you haven't been for a walk
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RHP User
11 years ago
Absolutely. Like inthekiss said, my brain is growing too.
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Lovinit28andKC72
11 years ago
I would say, I've taken, listened and giving advice. I've changed my way of thinking, opened my mind and feel that I'm evolving into my true self. I've changed my profile, my wants, my needs, my preferences and my cravings a few times over the past 9 months. I'm loving my life, myself and the people I'm bringing into it. I've met, spoken to, been involved with, had a connection with and have learnt from some amazing people. To me it makes sense, my life is a journey, I don't want to stop learning or listening, I want to experience things, meet interesting, exciting people. If I can share my experiences, my learning with others and it helps them or me in anyway then it's all been worth it.....💋
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'MWK2014' not much anymore.For us we prefer to actually meet with people and get individual thoughts and opinions. From our experience (and others we meet seem to say the same), the forums tend to attract bored people who don't get out and 'do life' and often people with incredibly intolerant and narrow views. How did you work that out? Yes its a narrow place, if others do not contribute. I get that part, but bored? not me sunshine not in a million years. I do get out and meet people, I actually have a life. I go for pizza now and again, and ok so I do not get out of my nightgown but its cold...and my ugg boots well they are comfortable. wipes pizza sauce of me old jumper...... us old bogans well this is the place for us to shine. In real life we woood neva get laid and meet high class peeeples like uzzzzzzz shit, i just got a crick in ma neck from looking up at your lofty pedestal, may i kiss your Lilly white arses? I Love it when the kitty strolls into the forums and craps on the carpet.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'inspirit' I change my picture - that's about all..........oh and my mood in the forms Its called bleedin bloody cultcha...ok skip that you can just come down for a weekend by the beach
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Tall74nHard9
11 years ago
You are awful, aren't you ? (Remember that one ?) I like it when the people with more, umm, shall I say, 'life experience' can contribute in the ways you do in the forums and then let little Kitty entertain us all.... Tall
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'inthekiss' Quoting 'MWK2014' not much anymore.For us we prefer to actually meet with people and get individual thoughts and opinions. From our experience (and others we meet seem to say the same), the forums tend to attract bored people who don't get out and 'do life' and often people with incredibly intolerant and narrow views. How did you work that out? Yes its a narrow place, if others do not contribute. I get that part, but bored? not me sunshine not in a million years. I do get out and meet people, I actually have a life. I go for pizza now and again, and ok so I do not get out of my nightgown but its cold...and my ugg boots well they are comfortable. wipes pizza sauce of me old jumper...... us old bogans well this is the place for us to shine. In real life we woood neva get laid and meet high class peeeples like uzzzzzzz shit, i just got a crick in ma neck from looking up at your lofty pedestal, may i kiss your Lilly white arses? I Love it when the kitty strolls into the forums and craps on the carpet. I've said it before. The forums do seem, to tend to attract bored people. . I've seen posts by people saying they post because they're bored often enough. And then there are the comments about how boring the forums are. It always brings to mind quotes like... "Boring is as boring does." and "Only boring people get bored.". Heard themoften enough when I was a littlie. I tend to wonder if the forums provide the drama that people are missing in their lives a lot of the time. . I know I mostly post these days when I'm feeling bored with nothing better to do too, or when I think I can actually help someone. Other than that, more and more I prefer to read the forums, and not even so much of that, the last year or two. . I agree with MWK about the narrow and intolerant views too. There is a culture of majority rules in the forums. I've seen enough comments to back that up as well. . Just my perceptions.
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RHP User
11 years ago
So many people ask for advice from the forums. And so many forumites give it :) As a result the forums are a wealth of information about what works, what doesn't, what's OK, what's not etc. So have you ever changed your thinking, behaviour, profile, general approach or something else based specifically on what you've read in the forums? If so, what? And how did it go? . I have nothing but negativity for you right now Burning. What I have learnt from the forums has been largely negative. The way I have changed has been largely negative. The way I do things now seems to be largely negative. The way I feel, is negative. . How is it working for me? Let's stick with the theme and say, "negatively". . I've learned about double standards, and how being popular will allow you to get away with so much more than most. About how the meaning of 'doin unto others' is twisted into a selfish shadow of the brightness of it's meaning. Sigh...
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RHP User
11 years ago
Just hugs to you.. I personally appreciate your posts...we may not always agree,but so what....you have a finely honed iconoclastic approach to much of the thinking here ...xxQ
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'inthekiss' Quoting 'inspirit' I change my picture - that's about all..........oh and my mood in the forms Its called bleedin bloody cultcha...ok skip that you can just come down for a weekend by the beach Yes and i shall though currently working mega mega in fact looking after 80 lads ;-) keeping me busy - have a few weeks off over xmas so seeyou then lovely for shits and giggles and of course bubbles!
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RHP User
11 years ago
Why thank you Ms passionate lady. And i think we agree on the narrow minded aspect... -------------------- Back to the OP....an example of something specific ive learned... There was a post recently wishing people happy fathers day. In the thread a lady (CD / TS ?? from memory) was talking about her pain on fathers day...as a wildly passionate father that dialogue was a real insight for me. A perspective i may have never heard in my circle. To connect any of that thread to boredom would be erroneous at the absolute minimum! ---------------- SDx Ps Mary im such a fan of little black leather/pvc skirts :-)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Plus ca meme chose plus ca change...or something like that. Meaning the more things change the more they stay the same.And another truism is change is the only constant.I have a clean mind I change it regularly.
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RHP User
11 years ago
It sounds like the forums haven't met your expectations lately. My advice (unsolicited though it is) is not to have any expectations. People don't always behave or respond the way we'd like them to and that's their right entirely. Being attached to how other people will behave and respond is a recipe for disappointment. Better to be unattached, never disappointed, often pleasantly surprised :) I also think all of us at times can see things that aren't actually there. We read a response as hostile when it was never intended that way, or we assume a comment is about us when it isn't. For example, you talk about a 'majority rules' element to the forums but I've never thought that. There are certainly people that like to chat and joke among themselves in their public posts but it has never seemed to me to be a barrier to others expressing their views on the forums and I've never noticed a wholesale, widespread shout down of other posters. Small scale yes (I'm remembering the forum police) but a majority move, not so much. Just a bunch of different people with opinions, some of which align and some of which don't. I like your posts too :) I probably wouldn't described them as iconoclastic but I'd certainly characterize them as genuine, intelligent and unafraid. I look forward to reading more of them. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'inspirit' Quoting 'inthekiss' Quoting 'inspirit' I change my picture - that's about all..........oh and my mood in the forms Its called bleedin bloody cultcha...ok skip that you can just come down for a weekend by the beach Yes and i shall though currently working mega mega in fact looking after 80 lads ;-) keeping me busy - have a few weeks off over xmas so seeyou then lovely for shits and giggles and of course bubbles! kingbed, so I guess you can bring half dozen of those lads
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happy0450
11 years ago
Our fixed attitudes & opinions are great; # They save us time#They give something to be passionate about#They allow us to fuel our ego by "proving" others wrong Sadly however many of our attitudes and opinions are based on little or no research or understanding of the topic, or long held biases & bigotry. Think of the person or our own strident view on; *Global warming / Carbon tax*Involvement in offshore conflicts* Alternative views on sexuality We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be. Being open to the thoughts and opinions of others is a great start I feel I've learnt from other perspectives here; #Couples perspectives on a bringing a third person into the relationship#Women's perceptions of the Men on this site#That many Women have a favourite side to have their clitoris licked To quote Tennyson, "I am part of all those whom I have meet"
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RHP User
11 years ago
On the flipside... There have been occasions lately, where I've handled things very differently in life than in the past. And gotten better resolutions. Thanks to a better understanding of differing opinions lol. . I feel like I know me better. And we get along ok, LOL! . Best of all, I've met people from the forums who will be part of my life forever. And that's a huge change in my world. :-)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Great to see you're paying attention to the important things ;) - Posted from rhpmobile
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MissBishere
11 years ago
I have changed in that my mind is now more open. I have learnt things and have a greater understanding of kinks and fetish and I don't judge or condemn. Doesn't mean I have changed my morals on some things just that I understand there are multiple parts to people and situations and it is not my place to judge them. But i have to say I will always think anyone that cheats and then tries to blame it on someone else or justify it is a complete tool. I don't care if you choose to cheat but own it as your decision. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I listen to music every day.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Tho I suspect theie are more people who have honey coated their bum.
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