Vick04

Vick04

M54 F55

Being married and looking for fwb lady

January 11 2021

Hi, I am the wife just reaching out to get a better understanding of why so many single ladies are a definately NO to married men, yet I can enjoy fwb fun with a single male. As the wife involved and totally supporting our open relationship now that our children have all grown and have “our” time now, I thought as a lady wanting no strings attached fun, a married man would be a great choice?
Looking forward to feedback, cheers Vicki

Comments

  • Kokoflamingo

    Kokoflamingo

    4 years ago

    As I said to one guy in the chatroom, I dont want to be in the middle of a hot encounter when the phone goes and its the wife asking him to come home to fix a burst pipe. There are plenty of single guys looking for NSA fun on here.

  • SpicyKale

    SpicyKale

    4 years ago

    Ok, can't answer as a single. We can however give you our thoughts as a couple that gets approached regularly by married guys. Firstly, we've heard every BS story in the world, with the wife never available to confirm the open relationship. No matter how genuine you are, you're fighting the behaviour of others. Secondly, with so many attractive singles on here your situation may just come across as too complicated to bother with. Thirdly, we're concerned that we'll just get stood up when Mrs comes calling. This one comes from our time early on here when our BS meter wasn't on point, nothing worse for the self esteem than getting stood up! We just don't go there now when there are just better options out there for us. Not saying any of the above applies to you, but that's our thought process with married guys these days! Maybe you'd have more luck with the female half of another couple looking for something similar? Good luck with it!

  • Sawadee

    Sawadee

    4 years ago

    Why do l get the feeling this could be Mr ?

  • Vick04

    Vick04

    4 years ago

    I want to thank you for your responses already and can see that for us genuine ones that fake or cheating husbands have made it nearly impossible to find anyone which is a real shame. Any married couples that do have a genuine open marriage and the lady is looking for an fwb with no complications, no drama and full trust, please contact us.
    Sawadee sorry that you are sceptical, I do get it, but I am honestly the wife half asking. I have always offered to speak or meet with anyone interested to verify
    Thank you all again 😊

  • FeistyFatty

    FeistyFatty

    4 years ago

    Because the Wife would know why and not need to ask. It's not a mystery lol

  • Mrs_Deep_Love

    Mrs_Deep_Love

    4 years ago

    Married, committed, open with a consenting wife is actually my preference.
    But very difficult to find 😁

  • MsSuperFoxy

    MsSuperFoxy

    4 years ago

    It's not the Husband. 🤫
    Ms Foxy

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    4 years ago

    As a single woman I don’t want NSA. It means I don’t care about you as a person, your problems and who you are really as long as we can have fun together without any drama. The husband already has his emotional partner and is looking for uncommitted fun. Fact of the matter is, it’s not a burst pipe that’s the issue where the wife is calling, but that the husband is emotionally unavailable (unless seeking a poly relationship) and that’s what’s unattractive to me. Given that I’ve opened myself up to someone physically, I also want to know they care of me mentally and emotionally

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    4 years ago

    It's not something I thought I would be interested in but when I went there I realised it had a lot of benefits. They know how to communicate, they know how to respect their partners (their wife and other partners), they value their free time so will value yours and be reliable, you get to have a great time, great sex, then fall into a deep sleep spread out across your bed and wake up chill because he's snoring next to someone else all night. Perfect.

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    4 years ago

    Were here if you wanna chat and maybe organise something

  • 2EssesExploring

    2EssesExploring

    4 years ago

    I think some of the comments above have nailed why it’s not as easy for an attached man to find playfriends as an attached female.
    I think the mental attachment is a big thing, most guys seem to not care if there is one but that’s a generalisation because I know I value it immensely. Also many guys would sleep with an attractive woman no matter what the real consent of the partner is whereas I feel most women have a stronger moral compass when it comes to this.

    For us we love to play together but with our family coming first it’s so difficult to find time when we can both be available and we are 100% down with each other exploring while the other looks after the kids....and I wouldn’t think we would disturb our partner’s play time unless a real emergency.
    Ideally for us would be to have a few lovers we have a deeper attachment to that we can meet together or alone as time and desires dictate.
    We still live in hope 🤗

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    4 years ago

    I was happy enough seeing a guy in an open marriage for a few months... Meet, scratch the itch, go. Now I want more... Occasional sleepovers etc. Just in a different headspace these days...

  • nightingale8

    nightingale8

    4 years ago

    Few women want to be involved with someone who is emotionally, financially and socially responsible to someone else. They want to be the object of desire and unshared focus, without the restrictions and limitations. In essence they want to be valued, and not disposable. With other single men, at least single women are on a level playing field.

    I admit I prefer single men because of the attention and flexibility, even being in an open relationship. It’s easy to say “why not my husband?” from the safety of your relationship. It can be hard going through the rush of a hot night with a man only to go home alone knowing he is off snuggled up to someone else. That can be a tough pill to swallow. From where I stand I know my relationship doesn’t devalue any other connections. They affect me, move me. I feel the downs as well as the highs, and that special person is important to me even though I don’t offer a relationship. I don’t expect them to know that.

  • Mask_007

    Mask_007

    4 years ago

    Hi OP. As a single guy. I definitely can tell you is matter of luck, desirability, compatibility and opportunity. And to get all together is really hard work. Some us guys been here in the seen for extremely long time have heaps to offer andno luck in the other hand, some just arrived and are extremely desired...
    I belive is about ticking the wright boxes.

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    4 years ago

    Being in an open marriage, I find it ironic that I can connect with single women occasionally and more easily than with married women. My preference is to find a married woman as an ongoing lover, FWB, girlfriend or what ever you want o label her as.
    I always make it clear that I do not want to leave my sexless marriage and that I'm not looking for ONS. I have had a couple of women who then decided that they wanted to get me to leave my wife. One wasted little time in demanding that I left her, the other tried to get me to leave by devious means. They're both ex's now. So I am wary of single women because of my perception that they form an attachment easily.
    I'd prefer a married woman who is in a similar situation to mine, happy to stay married but not happy with the mismatched libido's in that marriage. We'd both have someone to go home to and someone to scratch that itch.
    I have also been told that I'll do because they can't find a suitable single bloke to have an ongoing relationship with, It seems that as we age both men and women are finding it not so easy to find lovers despite the demand for them quite high.

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    4 years ago

    I think a lot of it also comes down to a game of numbers. There are fewer single ladies on here so single men are more open to meeting the female half of a couple in an open relationship for either a once off or ongoing connection. On the flip side, single ladies have a smorgasbord of single men to view and pursue if they like without even having to have couples in their search engine to find a man in an open relationship. Having looked at your profile (from my point of view as a single lady), I wouldn’t be interested in pursuing further due to the mention of safe sex being ‘if required’. I wouldn’t want to put myself in a situation when a man is in an open relationship and has other sexual partners that protection isn’t used all the time. I’m not sure if this is a broad thought amongst the singles community, but it is something I personally take into account. I wish you both the best and hope you find what you are looking for.

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    4 years ago

    As a single women we definitely have a huge range of choice... why would we give priority or choose someone who is already committed and emotionally unavailable, who would have time constraints and would never ever make your needs a priority?

    I would choose the single guys every time. They are much simpler.

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    4 years ago

    This isn’t about single vs married men...

    Because both groups can exhibit piss poor behaviour...

    This whole thread merely highlights that some men are cunts, and some aren’t...

    And it’s no different with women...some are Cunt’s, some are not....

    What matters is how productively you bounce back from a shitty experience...

  • Sawadee

    Sawadee

    4 years ago

    If you go looking for trouble ' you will no doubt find it. ... l know im up front about who l am and what l have to offer . But you dont know that and im well and truly over people who dont know me willing to judge my worth .. SO' for me ' putting myself through scrutiny leading to nowhere.. No thank you..

  • RHP User

    RHP User

    4 years ago

    Hello all yes this is the male half talking here (with the full consent of My wife as she is on this profile/site with me)... I would like to say that yes as a male (and I guess females) trying to find another female to meet and possibly play with is so hard. A: I have the boundaries of I have been with my wife so long (about 11 years) I find it hard to contact females just to chat net alone throw in a lil flirting here n there and B: showing that we are "real" and we are both here in full support of each other.. males are a dime a dozen I only have to blink on here and 5 messages come rolling in. It is hard to find people actually interested in the friendship side even couples net alone that elusive unicorn, but that is what we are now looking for friendship with fun added in and we never play alone we are in this together and share everything.....

  • LaughLoveLive

    LaughLoveLive

    4 years ago

    Putting it bluntly most of the time the men will do and say all the right things then once they hook up you are ghosted and they are onto the next conquest.
    If that’s what they want then fine but don’t pretend your wanting one thing then do another.
    There’s plenty of kik groups out there where woman talk and word gets around.

  • BeccyBec

    BeccyBec

    4 years ago

    If both the wife and husband are on board I have no issues. I agree with you that him having a partner is a great way to keep your emotional distance. The tricky part for me is that I can't host so if he is in the same boat that counts him out. Otherwise it makes no difference as long as he is out with permission 🙂