Are there new rules for dating?

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Hello fab69...for someone who is "new", you've got yourself a lovely validation Your post could make up several forum threads .....oh wait...they have...LOL Funny man.... Jx

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  I was excited when I first saw you af re in springwood as it is the suburb next to mine. But alas it is somewhere in Syndey. Yes I have a lovely post by a lovely girl. She is just after "sexploration". I have never disappointed in bed. Sample size 9. So I guess I will have to experiment some more till I reach over 20 in order to make it scientific. I am no longer In the dumps over break up and I am ready to fly. I just wanted to know rules as contact and aranging to meet a few girls in the same week seems a bit unfaithfull. I don't want to meet The One only to stuff it up.

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Quoting 'fab69'I was excited when I first saw you af re in springwood as it is the suburb next to mine. But alas it is somewhere in Syndey. Yes I have a lovely post by a lovely girl. She is just after "sexploration". I have never disappointed in bed. Sample size 9. So I guess I will have to experiment some more till I reach over 20 in order to make it scientific. I am no longer In the dumps over break up and I am ready to fly. I just wanted to know rules as contact and aranging to meet a few girls in the same week seems a bit unfaithfull. I don't want to meet The One only to stuff it up. Okies...so now we have a topic "The rules of contact to meet The One". We haven't had this topic before....as the peeps would say "RSVP thata way---->>>" lol. However, I reckon RSVP is just the same as here, except the double standard is disguised as "professionally respectable sex"...the double standard here is disguised as "no strings sex but if anything develops thats fine too". There is only one rule for contact. Its called respect. Faithful is a belief that forms part of our values. It holds different meanings for different people. If underpinned with honesty, being faithful can work - as long as both people in the relationship have the same understanding of faithful. When I hear the word faithful...I kinda think of church, sin and all the other pontificating rules (quite different from God). I prefer the word committment as it seems to be more progressive and flexible in nature. To re-phrase your statement using the word commit,"....to meet a few girls in the same week seems a bit non-commital"...ergo, sounds quite ok to me! And so when you sense The One is in your sights, you will be free to commit more time to her until such time you are both sure thats what you want. A committment. The definition is up to you - the people in the relationship. Jx

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Quoting 'OneBrightStar' Quoting 'fab69'I was excited when I first saw you af re in springwood as it is the suburb next to mine. But alas it is somewhere in Syndey. Yes I have a lovely post by a lovely girl. She is just after "sexploration". I have never disappointed in bed. Sample size 9. So I guess I will have to experiment some more till I reach over 20 in order to make it scientific. I am no longer In the dumps over break up and I am ready to fly. I just wanted to know rules as contact and aranging to meet a few girls in the same week seems a bit unfaithfull. I don't want to meet The One only to stuff it up. Okies...so now we have a topic "The rules of contact to meet The One". We haven't had this topic before....as the peeps would say "RSVP thata way---->>>" lol. However, I reckon RSVP is just the same as here, except the double standard is disguised as "professionally respectable sex"...the double standard here is disguised as "no strings sex but if anything develops thats fine too". There is only one rule for contact. Its called respect. Faithful is a belief that forms part of our values. It holds different meanings for different people. If underpinned with honesty, being faithful can work - as long as both people in the relationship have the same understanding of faithful. When I hear the word faithful...I kinda think of church, sin and all the other pontificating rules (quite different from God). I prefer the word committment as it seems to be more progressive and flexible in nature. To re-phrase your statement using the word commit,"....to meet a few girls in the same week seems a bit non-commital"...ergo, sounds quite ok to me! And so when you sense The One is in your sights, you will be free to commit more time to her until such time you are both sure thats what you want. A committment. The definition is up to you - the people in the relationship. Jx wish i had niceguys (may he res in piece) happy snap.would fit bueatifully here.you the man. who's the man. brighties the man.ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaHugs Earl

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Yes I was searching for the word and I thought of the first I could think of and best descibed my feelings. I know it isn't the best word cos how can you be unfaithfull to somebody you have not met. I'm not that much of a loony well I hope. I'm just a bit old school. Yes I can do respect always have. I'm just a tad blind as to when I'm not getting it in return.

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  There is no doubt in my mind that you are a most respectful man :) But you know what fab69? I reckon we have to respect ourselves first which is not as easy as it seems sometimes...and unfortunately we can't make people respect back. But something I have learned in recent months is to not stew on it. Make a choice, like I did today...said person sms'd me "have a wonderful weekend gorgeous"...oh, okay...pondering what happened to the tentative dinner date. So I wrote back that not being able to meet was no problem, but it's not ok to ignore our plans and subsequently ignore me. In my mind I deserved the respect of acknowledgement and I let him know. Have I stuffed the relationship?...I don't know. I'm only 50% of it...and will honour my part in being true to myself. His call now. Soooo, are you free for dinner Saturday night...we could compare notes...lol Jx

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Oh! Brightstar.((((((huggs)))))))))) I feel for you. I hope though you didn't jump the gun on you man. My last gf was a bit untrusting as us blokes may innocently be a bit thoughtless and do things that may be misconstrued. But I don't know the facts just looking from experience. May be your doubts are the universe telling you sop this now. Good luck. Any way on a brighter note Glen Innes should be half way between us I can be there by mid night. Lol

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  ...I just pushed the goal posts :) Tippy toeing around issues just makes for trouble. I have an open heart, nothing is done with vindictiveness. Bottom line, I think he is disappointed in himself MORE that he couldn't make the time to see me....and he didn't know how to say it. I understood,and I'm a patient person (yes surpisingly enough...along with *ahem* being direct), but he also needed to understand what I needed from him. It will declare itself...men need time to think...women need to talk. I just keep my heart open :) Hmmm, I was wondering if you would choose the coast road or the inland road..lol Thanks for the hugs! Jx

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Ok, first I hink a player has been explained. It is basically someone who goes around getting what he can from who they can then pretty much move onto the next person. This often involves manipulation and lying to get to the point of having sex then often will leave that person high and dry as they look for the next target.As for someone gay looking at you. Well some would say take it as a compliment. If they haven't contacted you though there isn't really any problem is there. If it does bother you then you could always block them. I get looked at by more couples and men than women, maybe that's just because there are so few women looking for guys. I think you did the right thing by messaging him, it gives him the chance to state why he was lookng.As for meeting someone on here, well I think it is much like meeting anyone. Everyone is different, on here you know whatthey are after a bit earlier than if you were at a bar. If you talk a bit with the person before meeting you should have a fair idea on how things are going to play out. Whether they just want a fling or something more. If you are the only guy on the radar or just another in the black book. So take every case on its merits. Sounds like you already have had more success than 90% of single guys on here so you must be doing something right.

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  A guy asks me out, but I have to defer, then I am free, and he says he is taking someone else. Is this the way we play the dating game now? I am confused. Sonya

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  RHP User

  16 years ago

  Sonya I don't understand either. You get as far as exhanging messages each returning interest. I try to clear my time and set up a face 2 face date and I get no reply. Instead the other party will remain online here at one of the times I suggested. WTF. Is playing online being replaced with real life. Sure you won't feel uncomfortable if your date is less than you expected and you won't get your heart shattered but is this living. They might aswell play "WOW". Chin up Sonya at least you are a girl and have the choice of selecting from your hundreds of flirts and messages. Us guys have too chase and wait for that reply that may never come.

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