M47
Affairs
April 11 2011
Comments
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RHP User
15 years ago
I think you're a long time dead and monogamy is for gibbon apes.HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
This thread will either find its legs or die in the arse, for the reason Stalky suggested. However OP, I would ask how likely you believe to be the case that "sometimes a fling is what could save a relationship it might make You realize of what you have and what you have been missing at home?" I can't help but wonder statistically, how often this is the outcome... *curious*
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RHP User
15 years ago
I guess I'm asking why are other people on here considering having an affair or fling behind their partners back and if other people on Here have already had an affair the why and how of it and if having a affair has enhanced their life or stuffed it up because I'm sure it's a step not to be taken lightly
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RHP User
15 years ago
It's really a very old fashioned word isn't it... kind of suggestive of a deep and meaningful and lasting relationship on the side.... as opposed to a quick shag in the bushes, no names, no questions, smirk on the face as you walk away bow legged into the sunset :pI mean, do people really go out of their way to have an affair if they're into their marriage? Somehow I don't think so.HugsStalky
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'stalky'I mean, do people really go out of their way to have an affair if they're into their marriage? Somehow I don't think so.HugsStalkyI think that may have been my point ...
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RHP User
15 years ago
Did it on purpose to finish a relationship. No matter what I did or said he wouldnt leave, but.......... I knew it was the one thing that would make him go so I did it and made sure I got caught. Childish I know but at the time it worked.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Why not try swinging with your wife? It will make the bond between you stronger if you both are into it plus the sex will be somewhat safer. Or a open relationship where you both date others without each other. But you both give permission to each other to have a bit on the side. Having a bit on the side / affair / cheating? No big deal 35% of couples do it anyway, but the consequence from your partner could be the end, thats the risk you take.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Boy..this will open a can of worms!! Speaking from personal experience, I (and I'm sure most of us) don't do it on purpose just to piss the other person off or just for shit and giggles. Yes there is a reason. It's not an excuse but what is there to do if your partner decides that she is no longer into sex? Yes, some of us have the cahoonas... we talk about it heaps but it always ends up in a shit fight. Its very hard going from a great sexual relationship to nothing overnight. Then to top it all off... she thinks there is nothing wrong with her so won't see anyone. Here cometh the solution. Find another person in the same boat (or friends with benifits) so you dont have to bring it up and fight about it anymore. Right or wrong, it's not always because we have nothing better to do! Enough is enough! I think my wife is a very beautiful woman and I tell her that every day. Do you know how much is sucks to have a hot girl next to you that I crave and want to enjoy but cant lay a finger on her? If the rest of the relationship was bad, well maybe I'd think about moving on. The thing is every other part is great! Just my input from someone who is there. Dont knock us all.
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RHP User
15 years ago
I have a theory... and I would be interested to hear feedback... I have always thought that Men primarily cheat for sex... and the attached males we have played with bore this out.. they love their wives and are happy with their relationship but for whatever reason sex at home is missing or not as often as they would like... or not as kinky as they would like...Women however, cheat for company and in order to get a man's repeat company she has sex with him. I cheated on my ex husband many many times, like ticklish in the end I let him catch me because he wouldn't leave any other way... What does everyone think???Mrs J
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RHP User
15 years ago
I know some guys that cheat. One in particular doesn't fit your mold. I mean, his lady is insatiable... neither of them are perfect partners so far as traditional relationship values go... they both cheat on each other... not because the sex at home is bad... it's probably just because they can. The real test of emotional betrayal for them would likely be if one or other develops an emotional attachment to someone else... I'm not sure that they would handle that... but then.. people are capable of loving more than one other and relationships hold together... look at Charlie Sheen.. hehehehe... anyway let's wait and see how it pans out. It's not right for me to apply my own social values to someone else's situation. I'll leave that to the priests and evangelists... who seem to love doing that. I really doubt there's much difference between genders so far as reasons go.... the rationalisation of it after the event might differ.. but the root causes are likely to flow across into both genders.LMFAO at the idea of being caught cheating to end the relationship. Only a woman would think of it. :p It just makes rational victims of the strategy (i.e. men) confused, especially if they are prepared to accept and move forward!HugsStalky Quoting 'justswingingbi' I have a theory... and I would be interested to hear feedback... I have always thought that Men primarily cheat for sex... and the attached males we have played with bore this out.. they love their wives and are happy with their relationship but for whatever reason sex at home is missing or not as often as they would like... or not as kinky as they would like...Women however, cheat for company and in order to get a man's repeat company she has sex with him. I cheated on my ex husband many many times, like ticklish in the end I let him catch me because he wouldn't leave any other way... What does everyone think???Mrs J
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RHP User
15 years ago
I cheat on my husband. But why? He is a work-o-holic, attractive and a wonderful provider. Everything a wife could want, apparently. He is, however emotionless, un-supportive, un-romantic and falls into the catergory of a '5 minute man' sexually. He can not match my sex drive and doesn't know what passion is. I need more than he can give me. I have the big house, the big car, the perfect children and on the outside what looks like the perfect lifestyle but I remain unsatisfied and unfulfilled. I crave lust and passion, but mostly SEX and lots of it! I don't wish to end my marriage but I have needs not being met. If I have go outside of my marriage to have them met, then that is what I will do. It's purely about sex for me.
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RHP User
15 years ago
for deciding to have an affair. You just have to be prepared to handle the consequences of your actions. If you truly love your partner and you know they would be devasted if they found out, maybe you should think twice.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'Sensual36' I cheat on my husband. But why? He is a work-o-holic, attractive and a wonderful provider. Everything a wife could want, apparently. He is, however emotionless, un-supportive, un-romantic and falls into the catergory of a '5 minute man' sexually. He can not match my sex drive and doesn't know what passion is. I need more than he can give me. I have the big house, the big car, the perfect children and on the outside what looks like the perfect lifestyle but I remain unsatisfied and unfulfilled. I crave lust and passion, but mostly SEX and lots of it! I don't wish to end my marriage but I have needs not being met. If I have go outside of my marriage to have them met, then that is what I will do. It's purely about sex for me. Wow I could have written this reply myself. Except my husband displays plenty of emotion and affection, is very attentive, supportive and romantic and really tries hard to give me the amount of sex i need, He is no match for my sex drive, but im yet to meet a man and have a relationship with one who really is. We actually have great sex, and lately amazing sex, yet i still find the need to stray! I think the idea of living a 'double life' is incredibly sexy yet I know this is somewhat of a phase and i will tire at some point, but for now that isnt an issue.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'affair2enjoy' Quoting 'Sensual36' I cheat on my husband. But why? He is a work-o-holic, attractive and a wonderful provider. Everything a wife could want, apparently. He is, however emotionless, un-supportive, un-romantic and falls into the catergory of a '5 minute man' sexually. He can not match my sex drive and doesn't know what passion is. I need more than he can give me. I have the big house, the big car, the perfect children and on the outside what looks like the perfect lifestyle but I remain unsatisfied and unfulfilled. I crave lust and passion, but mostly SEX and lots of it! I don't wish to end my marriage but I have needs not being met. If I have go outside of my marriage to have them met, then that is what I will do. It's purely about sex for me. Wow I could have written this reply myself. Except my husband displays plenty of emotion and affection, is very attentive, supportive and romantic and really tries hard to give me the amount of sex i need, He is no match for my sex drive, but im yet to meet a man and have a relationship with one who really is. We actually have great sex, and lately amazing sex, yet i still find the need to stray! I think the idea of living a 'double life' is incredibly sexy yet I know this is somewhat of a phase and i will tire at some point, but for now that isnt an issue. I agree with both of you ladies.. I had everything in my marriage, but the sex was dull and over very quickly without it even registering to him that is was satisfied that I needed more. I wish I had an affair, and not jusdging anyone here, but at the time I didn't think the right thing to do. I do accept some responsibility for the lack of sexual satisfaction. I could have tried harder to communicate about my needs. But then I think.. if you haven't got it.. you just haven't got it.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'affair2enjoy' Quoting 'Sensual36' I cheat on my husband. But why? He is a work-o-holic, attractive and a wonderful provider. Everything a wife could want, apparently. He is, however emotionless, un-supportive, un-romantic and falls into the catergory of a '5 minute man' sexually. He can not match my sex drive and doesn't know what passion is. I need more than he can give me. I have the big house, the big car, the perfect children and on the outside what looks like the perfect lifestyle but I remain unsatisfied and unfulfilled. I crave lust and passion, but mostly SEX and lots of it! I don't wish to end my marriage but I have needs not being met. If I have go outside of my marriage to have them met, then that is what I will do. It's purely about sex for me. Wow I could have written this reply myself. Except my husband displays plenty of emotion and affection, is very attentive, supportive and romantic and really tries hard to give me the amount of sex i need, He is no match for my sex drive, but im yet to meet a man and have a relationship with one who really is. We actually have great sex, and lately amazing sex, yet i still find the need to stray! I think the idea of living a 'double life' is incredibly sexy yet I know this is somewhat of a phase and i will tire at some point, but for now that isnt an issue. I agree with both of you ladies.. I had everything in my marriage, but the sex was dull and over very quickly without it even registering to him that is was satisfied that I needed more. I wish I had an affair, and not jusdging anyone here, but at the time I didn't think the right thing to do. I do accept some responsibility for the lack of sexual satisfaction. I could have tried harder to communicate about my needs. But then I think.. if you haven't got it.. you just haven't got it.
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RHP User
15 years ago
Actually I came along looking for an extra player for the home game, not a piece on the side per se.Generally I was looking for info on how this works (I got all the info I needed from the forums -THANKS GUYS!) I still like the forums and read the interesting viewpoints, I am not here to necessarily get a piece of naughty on the sly - though I MIGHT consider the right offer...Is that the same?
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RHP User
15 years ago
May Guilt riddle their conscience, May lies need 100 more to cover the one and may worry of being caught make them act inappropriately to their loved one...and may selfish individual pursuit infect them with poxy warts, the perfect gift to bring home...
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RHP User
15 years ago
Quoting 'stalky'The real test of emotional betrayal for them would likely be if one or other develops an emotional attachment to someone else... I'm not sure that they would handle that... but then.. people are capable of loving more than one other and relationships hold together... look at Charlie Sheen.. hehehehe... anyway let's wait and see how it pans out. It's not right for me to apply my own social values to someone else's situation. I'll leave that to the priests and evangelists... who seem to love doing that. I really doubt there's much difference between genders so far as reasons go.... the rationalisation of it after the event might differ.. but the root causes are likely to flow across into both genders. As per usual, I agree with Stalky. A lot of the responses above only reinforce my view of monogamy as a choice rather than a societal or religious imposition. It really does come down to emotional attachments and some compartmentalise better than others *shrug* . Live and let live. Value systems are as individual and unique as humans are. I think as long as you move through life with a harm minimisation approach, the universe tends to take care of the rest of it.
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