A funny thing happened to me on the way to the....

Comments

• 

  RHP User

  13 years ago

  Funny as Girl!!'   Love the Drive in one!!

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  13 years ago

  ...how are we supposed to follow that???

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  13 years ago

  Christmas party and I am tipsy.....Folks call me outside, I skip towards the outside my shoe caught on a small metal strip, I fall like a bag of potatoes forward, ohhh I bounced of my hmm my voluptuous body hahahah ohh fuck I thought shit fuck. And only my lovely big tits saved me from smashing my face into the concrete. Right arm broken, left leg bruised, glasses smashed, my pride hurt but hey “ my BIG tits saved the night. LOLOL, I was so happy and tipsy I didn’t even feel the pain until 4am in the morning. I was the talk of the office.

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  13 years ago

  In the queue at the checkout in the supermarket. I only had to get a couple of things, so rather than sit my daughter, who was all of about 2 at the time, in the seat provided for kids in the trolley, I let her stand in the main part of the trolley as this was something she loved to do. One of the local bikie gang members was in front of us, with his back to us. Leather vest, tight jeans and quite a nice rear end too. So I'm enjoying the view, and before I can stop her, my 2 year old reaches out and slaps his bum. He turnd around and looked at my daughter and she just looked back with her chin jutted out and batted her super long eyelashes at him. He turned to me and said "you're going to have problems with this one when she gets older" and, as I wished the floor would just open up and swallow me right there, I muttered something like "yeah, well, you're not the first person to tell me this." My son, who had remained quiet all this time while checking out this guys tattoos which covered his massive arms, tugs on the guys vests. The guy looks down at him to which my son, with chest stuck out with pride, announced "I've got 100 Pokemon tattoos at home".   I couldn't get out of there fast enough!     There was also the time I had borrowed a book from a friend on sex positions. I'd had my first child a couple of months before this and was now ready to spice things up a little in the bedroom with my husband. I had left this book on the dining table. I was busy tidying up the house like mad as I was in the process of arranging my son's christening and was expecting a member of the local Catholic group to call in and arrange dates and times for the big event as well as preparation classes before hand. She arrived two hours early. So, I offered her a coffee and came back out to the table with coffee and biscuits and froze when I followed her gaze to this book. I put the coffee down, and like the nervous house wife who got caught doing something really bad, laid blame on my husband as I put my hand on the book to take it away, saying "oh, I'm so sorry. You know what men are like. My husband only just got this yesterday and must have forgotten to put it away", see, good Italian Catholic girls never disclose that they enjoy sex but it's perfectly normal for their husbands to be raunchy sex craved animals. The woman said "oh no, it's perfectly ok to have a book on best practices to keep your husband happy, dear." Then she leaned over and whispered (as if anyone else was in ear shot) "I have a book just like this at home too!" So she slid the book towards herself and opened it and was confronted with photographic illustrations, some of them close ups and when she shakily turned the page, she had ventured into the threesomes and gangbangs chapter. She closed the book, saying "well, maybe not quite like this one". I then took the book, very red faced, and, for once, I couldn't wait to talk religion just to get out of that situation.     I have lots of others back before I had children, but will wait a little before disclosing any of them.

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  13 years ago

  I was 16 and wagging school with some mates. I looked big enough to pass for 18 and I was the guy they send to get beer. My mates dad was at work and his house empty. He decided to have a party and we had some girls from the nearby catholic girls school lined up. Strip poker was played. The girls were better poker players than me. I am down to jockeys after taking off socks, one at a time....   Hear car pull up out side....   Oh shiiiiit its his dad... Clothes fly all over the place as we try to get our own clothes.. Shiit who's got my daks?   Door opens on much activity... Mike

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  13 years ago

  Reminds me of my high school days and very near hits of getting caught!

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  13 years ago

  At work one day wearing a corset. The girls packed in tightly, or so I thought. Leant over in front of a client to fix something I was doing and without warning the girls FELL OUT!! Eyes bulging the guy almost had a heart attack!!! I quickly turned, put the girls away and turned back around and kept working on what I had to do. He wasnt gunna see any more or get any more then he already did!   Corsets at work, need to keep re-adjusting the girls to ensure accidents DONT happen when they shouldnt LOL

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  13 years ago

  Here I am...Wearing my shades, new dress and heels, thinking I'm oh-so-chic.Walking down the street, lunch hour, full of suave businessmen and poised businesswomen in their designer suits.When I look down while walking and realise my stay up has shimmied all the way down to my ankle.Another incident...Striding confidently down busy main street in the city, head held high, heels on, short dress.Step on pile of wet leaves and go sprawling.

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  13 years ago

  Off to a BDSM play party. I am wearing a leather corset, fishnets, leather skirt. My boyfriend is also kinkily leather clad but has accessorised with a large dog collar with a thick chain lead attached. Then we get pulled up by highway patrol for RBT.........

  reply

  like

• 

  RHP User

  13 years ago

  I can almost imagine the looks on the faces of the cops Mike

  reply

  like