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The elusive, single guy mystique seems to be propagating the forums lately. Who are these single men who promise the world only to disappoint later with either, not showing or failing to meet the expectations of couples? Aren’t single men supposed to drop everything once they hear the word SEX? Well, evidently not. In theory this is the stereotype we all have come to believe in, the reality is a bit different. These men have a number of reasons to be online and one of them is to explore their sexual horizons. Some are shy and slow starters and others overeager. Whichever they are, it seems sometimes they head on a collision track. Below are some possible character profiles:

Some single guys haven’t contemplated actually ever realizing their fantasies; they are here to live out their sexual fantasies in the safety of their home; they’re looking for cyber-sex. Without a doubt these men should be truthful and explain themselves instead of wasting genuine people’s time. However, here lies the problem it’s in this blurring of the lines of reality and fantasy that they get their kicks. To be optimistic let’s describe them as – ‘work in progress’- eventually cyber-sex won’t be sufficient and they will venture out into reality.

Meanwhile, The big question is how do you identify the ‘Cyber guy’ vs. the real meet guy? One obvious factor would be, these men seek a lot of details on what is and is not going to happen should you meet, this is an obvious sign of their intent – not to meet but for you to entertain them. Try to have them call you instead if they do, that’s a reasonable sign that they might be genuine in their pursuits

Other single men do want to actually meet. However, due to inexperience or on the unfolding of the events they get cold feet. They start doubting whether they can meet your expectations. Or worse they’ve lied a little about their size, age and even what they can do. All of these start to take hold of them and then all their excitement becomes fear and yes they are going to let you down, at this stage not even naked Angelina Jolie will help them rise to the occasion.

There is also the male who is obviously confident and wants this experience. Sometimes little things upset the flow of events. Maybe someone is in a hurry to be thrashed and he hasn’t quite gotten there yet and the more he thinks about it the more nervous he gets; deflating as he ponders – How embarrassing!!!! Another scenario, no better than the first, he is so thrilled, excited and he cannot make it last. He didn’t mean to and he didn’t want to disappoint. Worse is that he can’t relax enough to get going again. However, not all is lost if all involved are willing they could make plans to meet again and laugh this first experience off. Second time round things can only improve!!!

Here are a few tips on how to make your experience with the single guy work for you.

1. Communication is important, exchange photos and then phone numbers, pick up the phone and call, have a little chat and get to know each other a bit.

2. Don’t create scenarios that are too perfect leave room for the unexpected things will most definitely vary from what you’ve imagined, after all we’re dealing with human beings.

3. Try to be open to anything, picture the worst-case scenario and be willing to give it a try again. Sometimes it takes a few times to get things right.

4. Remember the single men feels a bit nervous since he’s the outsider and this can be a bit intimidating.

5. Sometimes parties and ‘meet & greets” are good places to meet your prospective single male. Exchange numbers and/or set a place to meet for drinks.

6. Sometimes we forget that the aim of all this is to have fun, so keep it light. There are times when we come out winners and others when we learnt to deal with a new challenge. In any case, not all is lost. As a last resort, you can always hit the town together and have fun or stay in and make home porn.

7. DateFinder is a great way to find your single guy. Especially, if it is last minute and you are suddenly in the mood. DateFinder has a number guys waiting to be contacted for some fun on the night.

8. Validations: RedHotPie has this awesome validation feature where members can validate other genuine people they have actually met. Profiles with Validations should definitely be your top priority.

Obviously, there is no one-way to approach this. RHP readers are familiar with the article paralleling ‘Porn Sex vs. Real Life sex’, much the same, sexy encounters are sometimes a bit different from what you had in mind, not to say that is less fun. With every situation you have to make quick, intuitive decisions and the more practice you get the easier it gets.

What are the best approaches you’ve used that were successful when meeting single men?

For more on the subject read Redhotpie forum thread, single guy with couples.