Articles

Sex may be one of the most beautiful, intimate moment you can share with someone. But between the tossing, turning, sweating and moaning, every couple is bound to have their share of bedroom mishaps.

Truth is, sex doesn't always go the way we want it to. Sometimes sex can be a sum of moments that are funny, weird, and downright embarrassing.

No one can escape these embarrassing moments - what is for certain is that many of  these embarrassing things will happen during sex, the only variable is the order in which they might happen.

After reading this you might rejoice over the fact that your epic sex fail could’ve been worse, Because below there’s a list of “it happens” to more red-faced incidents, that will have you think “Glad it didn't happen to me!!”

Good thing is, no one is immune to them and when they do happen, don’t worry too much, soon you’ll laugh about them. We may not be able to control these unexpected embarrassing moments, but we can choose how we react to them.

Below is a list of 10 red-faced moments everyone has or will go through:

1. The Wet Spot

You know what kind we’re talking about. That pool of moisture afterwards, on the sheets? Evidence of all the fun you just finished having. No matter how much you avoid lying on it or touching it, it just sits there, refusing to dry up. Don’t worry. Just put a nice dry towel over it or throw the covers on top of it, and you’ll forget about it in no time.

2. What did you just say?

Dirty talk done well and at the right time is awesome and brings things up a notch. It’s fucking hot!! Yet, say the wrong thing and you risk killing the mood. Practice makes perfect, play around to find the limit that you’re comfortable with. Sex is an adventure — make sure you’re getting the most out of it. You might never be a totally good at dirty talk, but hey we can’t all be good at everything.

Who better than Amy Schumer to illustrate dirty Talk at it’s worse, watch this scene below for a good example of dirty talk going wrong:

3. Suggestion rejection

You’re having rough and tumble hot sex, the time seems right and you suggest that kinky lewd thing you always wanted to try. Oops, maybe a bit premature, you soon find out, because your partner cringes, rolls away from you and claims to feel unwell. Hell embarrassing, but nothing you can’t get over. If you never try it, then how do you know if you hate it?

4. Is that pee?

Yep, women sometimes pee during sex. If she has a sensitive bladder, it may happen.  It’s also possible if she’s having an extremely intense orgasm and just squirted. The solution? Do not overthink it. Who cares, if you had a great time, who really wants to discuss whether it’s pee or a great orgasm.

5. Messy Bush

You eye each other across the bar and you just know it, this is going to end up in a hot, steamy night of sex. He leads you to his bedroom and peels off your clothes, gets those sexy panties off and it’s only then that it hits you — your bush is out of control. If he’s right into you, it won’t matter, who knows he might be into bush, well you can only hope.

6. Lockjaw

Blowjobs take time.

They’re hot, but after a while, having your mouth open that wide begins to make the old jaw stiffen and suddenly you are ready to just move to the big show.

Getting a lockjaw is awkward but not the end of BJ. The key is to mix in manual stimulation and plenty of licking and kissing, lavishing his shaft and testicles with TLC. Also, try practicing to find a position that won’t stress your joint too much.

7. Not in the same page

Several times over you just prove that both of you have very different ideas of what was at stake. Each one pushing for what they want until it all becomes the worse hookup in history. Not being on the same page results in BAD SEX and sometimes the sex is so bad, your partner decides to pack up and leave you naked in your bed.

8. Mission impossible

Sometimes those adventurous positions just don’t work out . Your limbs never aligning but you are adamant to try this new position you read about in Cosmo. You end up tired, deflated, with cramps and totally pissed. No happy ending here. It happens.

9. Body Piercings

Piercings  are definitely sexy and add to the intrigue until you want to share body fluids. Somehow you get stuck together. It just slows things down a bit because you need to figure out how to come undone. With a bit of a sense of humour just laugh it off and if you’re still in the mood, try again this time avoiding getting tangled.

10. Performance Issues

The moment when you realise penetration will not be happening. Performance issues can arise as a result of a number of problems. This hot and sexy woman lying in front of  you, you want to have sex with her, but your other head is just not in the game. Hey, don’t beat yourself up, maybe it wasn’t meant to be. It’s life. Grab some ice cream and watch Game Of Thrones.

Don’t forget to have fun and enjoy the moment, no matter how awkward and embarrassing sex can get. Make a joke, and try to move on, because most times you can’t control these things.

Even if things get weird, you’ll always have that story you can share. Hey, bloopers make the best stories.

Have a story to share with us?

Let us know in the comments below.