Meeting at houses

Meeting at houses

    | Jan 22, 2020
arrowman81   Man 38yrs
Hi guys do people get nervous before meeting someone new ?? I love the thought but I do chicken out some times !! My thoughts are what if it’s a set up is it a female !!! I have had a bad experience before has any one else ?? Please is this just me or it does happen

- Posted from rhpmobile
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
PassionFreaks   Couple Man 44yrs Woman 50yrs

l thought the simple answer would be,

Meet in a public place and don't go to someones house you don't know. But hey that's just me.

MsPF
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
SpicyKale  

Couple Man 46yrs Woman 40yrs

I'd be going with my gut! I might be completely out of touch, but how many single females would meet for a first date at their own house, or a guys place for that matter? I can completely relate the rush of meeting new people, it's the chemical responses in our brains that make it either exciting or scary as all fuck! There's nothing wrong with a coffee or a quick drink as a first meet though. If they aren't willing to meet in public first are they really worth the effort! I don't think we'd even go to another couples house we hadn't met first.... Ok maybe one or two interstaters that we've been trying to line things up with for ages 😊

Safety doing this applies to the guys too!
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
MsJdays   Woman 46yrs

No, nope, no way, don’t do it, shit no!! Are you crazy?? ( not OP, what I say when someone asks to come to my place first up)
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Sawadee   Man 57yrs

Meet in public everytime.

If your both thinking the same about meeting in public , there's a good chance its legit.. Otherwise you never know what you'd be walking into . Probally OK, but its not worth taking the chance...
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
73bandit  

Man 47yrs

Had a number of meets at my place which did surprise me a well as other places but all went well as I seem to be legit , as for others I can not say but be safe folks.
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
SuperFoxxxy   Woman 48yrs

SpicyKale

You'd be quite surprised by how how often many single women/men do invite strangers into their homes straight up. One woman in piticular who comes to my mind does. She gets so wasted and trashed that she has no idea who is who in her home. Then goes into chat room bagging out the guys for taking advantage of her. Reality is, it does happen more often than we think it does. Sadly, it is reality. Especially when one is in a really bad head space, they do make unsafe choices. Sometimes one has to hit the bottom of the barrel to understand that bad choices do have negative consequences. Sometimes some will never change their behaviours.

Ms Foxy
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
aussian43   Man 48yrs

I have had ladies meet me in a motel with no public meet in advance on a few occasions. Those cases all involved a lot of messaging over time first.

Much better to meet elsewhere, without expectations so either party can get out if needed.

I have not had any bad experiences yet luckily.
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
moan_a_lisa   Woman 50yrs

Chickening out on meeting people once arranged is poor form.

Sure bit of nerves always going to happen. But if your meeting in a public venue with no expectations.

Then safe to say that you can leave at anytime if you found them to be dishonest about how they represented themselves.

What your talking about is high risk for multiple things to go wrong. Sounds like your interested in excitement of it. But nerves or high anxiety maybe just your body telling you not to put yourself in harms way.
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
island_life  

Couple Man 52yrs Woman 49yrs

Are you one of "those guys"..
Who cancels last minute or even worse.. just doesn't show up ..?
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
KittyDeluxe   Woman 50yrs

Don't

- Is my advice.

Always meet in a public place.

I also have a safe call in place - basically a person who will contact me at a pre-arranged time to make sure everything is ok - every time I meet someone new.


Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
KittyDeluxe   Woman 50yrs

Nerves

Being nervous is completely normal. I still get nervous even after seeing someone multiple times.

Just remember that the person you are meeting is just as nervous as you.
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
usebi

the truth

The Company line is you never meet at someones house first up, men should never ask it's bad form and women should never except due to the personal danger.
The reality is most people have done it and of course for most it's been fine bar a few dud roots and a few have had nastier experiences.
I've done it at mine and at hers, being male it's less of a personal security issue and in all cases I have had extensive phone conversations.
BUT, I wouldn't recommend it for everyone, I think the meet first play later scenario is way safer for all concerned, I think the golden rule is, as mentioned follow your instincts listen to that gut feeling.
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
megz85g   Woman 35yrs

Too be honest the only time I had a bad experience was when meeting in public first- massive creep alert.
Luckily the others were all great, but I think you have to go with your gut.
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
SpicyKale  

Couple Man 46yrs Woman 40yrs

Foxy

Both parties are potentially leaving themselves in a vulnerable place in that scenario. The lady runs the risk of being taken advantage of and the guy runs the risk of being accused of god knows what. How much consent can you give if you're trashed?

Public meets and zero regrets in my opinion

We're definitely not in the camp of hotel meets only, fake names etc... that we've heard on here. If we like you enough to want to get into your pants you're welcome in our house🤷‍♂️
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
AnnieWhichway   TV/CD 58yrs

All part of the adrenaline rush

No matter where you meet.

Done all the various meeting scenarios. Mine. Theirs. Hotel. Public.

But gut feeling for each contact but I'm more settled these days so it's public place. If I'm good enough to want to hook up, I'm good enough to be seen in public with.



But OP, those that don't show are the worse. You have balls or not? Man up and show up.
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
deepestpurple   Man 38yrs

Yeah mate it's definitely a rush




I've done it few times and it's definitely an adrenaline rush. I've never had any bad things go down though. I'm absolutely gobsmacked that the women on the other end of the situation were ok with it and it sort of does make you suspect a setup.
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
EarthQueen   Woman 49yrs

Curious

What was your bad experience?

If you don’t feel comfortable don’t do it? How would you relax and enjoy yourself if you are feeling that stressed?
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
notmyrealname

anxiousness vs excitement




Anxiousness and Excitement are apparently the same physiological response in our body, so you could potentially argue whether you're nervous or excited is purely a choice on where you like to stand in your head...kettle of fish for another time to discuss...

Public meeting first is obviously the safest way to go for all parties. I have met at a persons house for the first time, hotel first time, secluded public, but have had conversations etc beforehand to make the decision to go ahead. It's just about having enough info to go one to decide for yourself that everything is legit before going ahead. And with the information at hand, if it's not legit, can you exit the situation easily enough.

I have had one meet not go well at someone's house for the first meet. It wasn't the worst thing in the world, but I'm not sure meeting in public beforehand would have stopped the situation from happening anyway. I'm being vague with details, but the point I'm making is that despite all the safe guards you put in life, at some stage you've got to put your foot forward and go with it - I'm not trying to be nonchalant about it, but a healthy dose of reasoning over gut is sometimes required.

If you do ever back out, my advice to OP is that the courteous thing would be to at least let the people know. It's not nice pulling out at all, but ghosting is even worse. Just for the record if I agree to meet, then I keep my word.
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
86Jasindy   Couple Man 34yrs Woman 39yrs

Other than RHP I have never online dated, so not exactly sure how it all works. My partner however, did before we met. He told me he had been invited to a girl's place to meet there after online conversations (I believe it was only one girl?)

I put myself in her position, and I doubt I would invite a stranger into my home. I doubt I would have felt comfortable turning up at someone's place I didn't know. Maybe I just watch too many true crime dramas 🤣

I think it's strange, or maybe I'm just too private? Or too out of this dating game?
Jan 22, 2020 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
hotfudgebne  

Woman 48yrs

Well I must be the lucky exception. Nearly every person I’ve met from rhp I have invited to my home for a drink for the first meet. We’ve already set ground rules and quite a few times - it was just a drink as one or both of us didn’t feel the chemistry.

But generally, I’ve had nothing but relaxed, enjoyable vibes and great encounters. And quoting Foxxy - I’m not at the “bottom of any barrel”! Lol! I will state a caveat here - I have a very good BS detector and if anything feels even slightly off, then so is the invitation. Safety is v important and I have a face pic and a back up buddy I’m place every time. But I’ve never had to call.... trust your own instincts x

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