I have been dating tough guys most of my life like footy players and recently had a fling with a more sensitive guy and it blew my mind. Should I change my type or was this a one off?

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I don’t think sensitive guys have the monopoly on great sex – and on the flipside I know plenty of footy players and tough guys who are marshmallows inside too. In other words, you can’t always judge a book by its cover. However, there has been some interesting research that might stimulate the average tough guy to get in touch with his ‘inner bloke’ a bit more.

Studies say that 50% of Baby Boomers, 59% of Millennials and 62% of Gen Xers would describe themselves as men who ‘feel more’. What that means is they are the kind of guy who does not mind talking about his feelings and being open to more sensitive conversations. This practice of noticing and acknowledging emotions increases neural areas in the brain associated with intimacy.

The surprise was, the study concluded that there were actually a significant number of health and wellness benefits from having this kind of world view. 20% claimed to feel more connected to their partners, 20% said their sex life was better than average and they were 18% happier with their partners than the average guy. It also improved heart and stress levels.

Interestingly, these ‘sensitive’ guys were also 11% more likely to be gym member, so yes there is some pretty clear evidence that guys who acknowledge feelings have a better outlook on sex in general. But remember, sensitive comes in all sorts of packaging. My husband is 120kg, rugged looking, ex-Commando and sensitive as a gummy bear on the inside. Which is perhaps why we are still married after 20 years.


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  • Squirtress

    Perfectly answered often ‘less is more’ !!!
    It’s not what you do but how it’s done that makes sex so amazing.
    Women have radars for those selfish ‘all about me’ vibes lol.

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