T54
Relationships and crossdressing
December 29 2014
Comments
AnnieWhichway
9 years ago
there are woman and men who are open to a relationship with crossdressers. And there are a LOT of men who will show you a good time in a casual basis. Finding someone for a long term relationship will take time though. One of those things that the harder you look, the harder it will be. It's when you least expect it that it will likely happen. As with most things in life. Once crossdressing has been part of your life for a long period it can be almost impossible to stop. And if you enjoy it, why should you stop. It's only social injustice that makes you feel that you should not do it. Embrace your inner girl and lose any guilt that you associate it with. I've been wearing panties for 40 years. I'm not stopping any time soon. Annie xx
RHP User
9 years ago
I was wondering if you could educate me a little please. I know people cross dress but apart from that I don't really know much about it. As in your motivations, when you started, what you get out of it, when do you do it, do you like to dress in a certain way,... slutty, demure, etc, etc. If you could tell me that would be awesome,,,, although obviously very personal questions so I will understand if you don't want to talk about it.
Thanks!!RHP User
9 years ago
I am BI so the possibility of having a relationship with a man/woman (fuzzy area in between) is always a open, but then the possibility of me entering any form of relationship is very low as I have set my expectations to what I need in another person to such a point that they are indeed very rare. Love is not a relationship, I can love almost anyone, many I love I can not ever have a relationship with.
7 years ago I had absolutely no clue what XDing was and why. I actually avoided such people. My adventurous spirit though saw me engaging with someone like that, and then with more. Now I know many, some as friends, some with benefits, some very special. As with all people there are some that are a joy to be with and others, casual friendship is all that will ever happen or can be tolerated.
The reasons for XDing seem to be as varied as the number of people that do it and I do not concern my self as to why beyond my natural curiosity. If its a kink or a life style, if its purely sexual or deeply biological I will not judge someone based on that. I will judge with my eyes tightly closed, and how I feel for that person as a person.
So yes the possibility is always there, the probability is low but at least much more probable than Miss Vanilla Plain even if she is he some parts of the day.
In the end no matter how much I like someone, they have to like me. I don't. get to pick, I can only use luck and find.AnnieWhichway
9 years ago
So very different for every crossdresser. My story is so very different as I wanted to be transgendered originally so my experience would not really apply. However I did study the whole field of cd/tv/ts/tg to improve my health and life. I also had a close friend who was a crossdresser and found his story to have a lot of common denomintors with the "average" cd, if there ever was such a thing. He started at age 12. He had no knowledge what so ever of sex. Had not had the father son chat. Had never masturbated. But he was drawn to his mothers clothes. He was the youngest child and it was said later on in life, his mother had always wanted a girl. Do not know if that influenced his fasci ation with womens underwear. It was a sexual act. He was always aroused when dressing but at the same time unsure of his process of arousal. In the years that followed, he would use every opportunity to dress. 2 years later at the age of 14 he experienced his first orgasm in life which was whilst dressed in womens clothes. From that point in time sex to him related to crossdressing. As this process was reinforced each time he crossdressed, he was utimately sentenced to a lifetime of it. Normal sex was possible but to achieve orgasm he had to play a crossdressing fantasy in his mind. Years of playing privately lead to the adrenaline rush of going public. To go about the streets dressed as a woman and not be outed was the utimate. He achieved this often which then lead to the fantasy of being sexually like the woman he was portraying and have sex with men. Not every crossdresser goes out in public and not all of them have sex with men. But there is that trail that if taken and experimented with, there is a progression toward being more and like a realwoman. He preferred to dress slutty and there is a tendency for most to dress that way if able. But there are crossdressing clubs that frown on that and encourage their members to dress conservatively. Faaark. I have to post this now before my fingers get worn to the bone or I loose it.....again. ill add to it tomorrow. Annie
RHP User
9 years ago
id different for me now meeka ,,,,,im like you hun ,,,,dressing up is no big deal ,,,,,however as a cross dresser previously ,,,,,when dressed i found it allowed me to let the fem in me out ,,,kinda let me put my macho side away n be the real me ,,,,
teachme383
9 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' I was wondering if you could educate me a little please. I know people cross dress but apart from that I don't really know much about it. As in your motivations, when you started, what you get out of it, when do you do it, do you like to dress in a certain way,... slutty, demure, etc, etc. If you could tell me that would be awesome,,,, although obviously very personal questions so I will understand if you don't want to talk about it.
Thanks!!
Hi Meeka,I started cross dressing in childhood long before I had any idea about sex or sexuality. I'm not sure why I started, but I do remember forgetting to take pyjamas with me (mum let me pack my own bag even though I was only about 6 or 7) once when I was staying with an aunt and uncle. I had to wear one of my female cousin's night shirts and panties to bed. I don't remember much about the experience, or if I even tried to protest. I spent more time staying with the same uncle and aunty during my childhood and teens, and usually had to sleep in one of my cousin's rooms while they were staying elsewhere, usually on school holidays. At some point in time, and there is no specific first incident I remember, but I went through one of my cousins closets and draws out of curiousity, and decided to try on some pantyhose because I always liked the way they looked. From that point on I was hooked, and started spending more and more time wearing my cousins feminine clothes, and loving it.In my early teens I was drawn to females, like most boys, but unlike most boys, I liked what they wore, and how they looked, but didn't really fantasize about having sex with them. When I found my fathers stash of porn magazines, I was more excited by the erotic stories than by the pictures. I got especially turned on when reading stories written by women, and found myself imagining playing the part of the women in the stories, and not the men.As I got older I was able to go and buy my own feminine clothing, and it just felt right to me to be wearing them. From then on, I just grew more and more attached to feeling and wanting to feel feminine. As these feelings increased, so did my desire to feel more and more like a woman, and this led to me trying inserting things into my body, so I could better imagin what it was like to be made love to like a woman. Now I am single and live alone, and always wearing something feminine when I am home. Anything from just panties under my jeans, to dressed fully feminine with makeup, nailpolish, jewellery, perfume, and the whole works. This has been part of me for my whole life, and I will never be able to not cross dress. And so as I gett older, I am hoping to one day find someone I can share this part of my life with, and not have to hide my inner woman from everyone in the world.Sorry if this is a bit long winded, but I guess I am a bit like a woman when it comes to explaining my feelings. My life is not simple. I'm glad that people want to understand people like me better, and not just want to judge.Jessicaxoteachme383
9 years ago
Oh, forgot to mention, that I only want to look like a female, not like a prostitute, so I try to dress like women my age would
RHP User
9 years ago
Are women ,ever since the 1930s we have been able to wear any attire .When I was in my 30s I loved to wear a gorgeous tailored tuxedo... However it wasn't necessarily an expression of my masculine side..I do think though that I have many traits that most strong independent women share that are considered masculine... I think that it is a great pity,that men in particular are constrained in their expression of their sexuality... XxFreya .
RHP User
9 years ago
Thank you Jessica, Annie and Catherine.
Another probably dumb questions: I have met crossdressers at sex parties before and I have called them dirty girls as they are doing something deliciously naughty. I assume that they are dressed as women therefore I refer to them and act as if they are women. Is that the right thing to do? Seems completely obvious that I should do that, but sometimes I wonder if all CD feel that is appropriate. Would a man dress as a woman but still want to be a man and addressed that way??AnnieWhichway
9 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' Thank you Jessica, Annie and Catherine.
Another probably dumb questions: I have met crossdressers at sex parties before and I have called them dirty girls as they are doing something deliciously naughty. I assume that they are dressed as women therefore I refer to them and act as if they are women. Is that the right thing to do? Seems completely obvious that I should do that, but sometimes I wonder if all CD feel that is appropriate. Would a man dress as a woman but still want to be a man and addressed that way??
99% of crossdressers when dressed would prefer to be referred to as a female(or male in the case of a female crossdresser). That is the object of the fetish, to be identified as the opposite sex.AnnieWhichway
9 years ago
on from the earlier post, i wanted to touch on the guilt that a lot of crossdressers experience in their life.
Even though they love and are addicted to the habit/fetish, there is a lot of guilt and embarrassment associated. The "average" CD will be overcome with the guilt to the point they will discard their secret stash of clothing and vow to make a fresh start and new life without the need of crossdressing. This often happens at the start of a new relationship which is combined with the desire to avoid any conflict or being caught by their new partner. In the majority of these incidences, the need for crossdressing will eventually return over a period of time and they will start to accumulate possessions for their fetish and the process begins again.
It's strange that the stigma of being labelled a crossdresser in society seems to be worst than being labelled a car thief for example. The embarrassment of being outed has huge implications to him. For this reason, approaching a new partner with a confession of what they are into is one of the biggest dilemmas in the life of a crossdresser. On one hand they are in love with a new partner and would love to share this with them. But there is a high risk their confession will be met with revolt and the possibility of losing their loved one and experiencing the shame and embarrasment in the process.
This leads to a life of hiding it from their partner or wife. Understandably, the partner if finding out about it by accident is extremely hurt and saddened by the deceit and perhaps the ending of the relationship. So there is the risk of going down either path. A huge conundrum for most CD's.
Which is why the question that Jessica has posed in the topic is so meaningful to crossdressers.The true value may be missed by the majority of people who do not understand what crossdressers endure in society, even in these modern times.
Well done Jessica for highlighting this topic, and good luck for your searchRHP User
9 years ago
I actually quite like being dressed up in a corset and panties. Understand I am not trying to to look like a woman I just like the look and the feel of dressing up this way. The funny thing is that I really feel sexy when dressed this way.
Given the right person a night of feminisation would not be out of the question...Like most things it is some thing you should try before you knock it.
LCRHP User
9 years ago
no way meeka ,,never call them a guy or man ,,,,,im transgender n live as a woman 24,,7 ,,,,,,if we look like a gurl ,,we is a gurl ,quickest way for me to shut my legs n bolt ,,,is to refer to me in any masculine form or way ,,,,,,,
RHP User
9 years ago
There sure are. My partner is very comfortable with my passion of being feminine often. And it was all new to her. I only on occasions dressed up, then I mentioned to her I'd love to wear heels during sex. It kinda grew from there hehe now we are so happy with my large range of outfits, wigs, makeup etc 😊
teachme383
9 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' Thank you Jessica, Annie and Catherine.
Another probably dumb questions: I have met crossdressers at sex parties before and I have called them dirty girls as they are doing something deliciously naughty. I assume that they are dressed as women therefore I refer to them and act as if they are women. Is that the right thing to do? Seems completely obvious that I should do that, but sometimes I wonder if all CD feel that is appropriate. Would a man dress as a woman but still want to be a man and addressed that way??
I would hate being referred to in any masculine way, so yes, you are doing the right thing by calling them girls.
Deepdished
9 years ago
Im sure that there's plenty of people that would want to share there life with you. It's just finding them. I'm lucky enough to have a fantastic woman in my life, to whom I'm married too, who is extremely understanding and supportive of me and my choices. So they, are out there, although i do not envy you on your search..Good luck...
RHP User
9 years ago
I'm a guy that's gets so turned on buy ts/cd/transgendered and there's no doubt ihn my mind if I meet the right person could stay with for a life time hope this answers or helps n I know other guys that are in relationships and going well :)
RHP User
8 years ago
I can say at an early stage of my life I found the whole crossdressing side of my personality and adolescent life as a way of researching,trying it out whilst ultimately purely fascinated with how i looked and felt in atypically female clothing and admiring my reflection in the mirror,enjoying looking pretty...Over the years and now and again feeling some guilt after being caught in mid cross-dress by my mother and once by an aunt,I too tried in vain to many times to push aside this side of me,often giving away to charity my whole wardrobe, then weeks later only to begin re-buying and collecting a new whole wardrobe and attempt hiding all the clothing...By my early 30's I was confronted by my mother and 2 of my Aunty's and confessed during an intervention (that my dad and other male siblings were deliberately absent from),this is where my mother and Aunts weren't shocked by what I had confessed,and at the same time i managed to partially change their skewed view of how i felt towards this issue/their views of this issue,and this was the first real time I sought counseling,received positive support from my Aunts,but was directed away (by my mother) from seeking anything in the direction of a gender change....It wasn't until the last few years , my mother caved in and finally accepted my views,strongest and deepset lifelong desire of a gender transition,after years of conversations with my 2x Aunts that grew up in countries that fully accepted and or didn't make a fuss of gender transitiant individuals..including the variety of crossdressing people.. And now I live my daily (and nightly lol) life ,100% as a confident (pre-op MtF transexual) Woman,working as a woman,enjoying a social life,and presenting myself as none other than a female..and will shortly have saved up for the expensive,overseas surgical interventions to align my physical body to my female life/lifestyle..Looking back on my life ,specifically the whole Crossdressing and seeking companionship I will admit was a truly difficult time,often realising many males thought of romantic interactions with me as merely something sexual,fetish and never proud enough to admit to others they knew..I found and enjoyed a couple brief relationships with openly bisexual or lesbian women..often being introduced when I least expected to find someone interested in me and share accepted views about my xdressing.. I am aware there is a growing number of guys and girls that are comfortable and mature enough & persuing Cd/TG?TS relationships with genuine enthusiasm and sincerely seeking real longterm romance & I truly commend their open bravery in society as these people are helping to break down the negative stereo-typical values outdated in today's relationship landscape..My days of x-dressing officially over ..Now dressing female as a form n function of everyday life,and 110% proudly a woman inside, and soon enough whence post-op to be recognised fully legally & officially female within Australia..
Racheljenkins
8 years ago
Saphire you are a beautiful woman . From one CD to another I totally understand everything you have talked about. I'm 46 and around three years ago I told everyone in my life about myself. It didn't go well now I have no friends or family in my life. I'm having to start from scratch at this age it's not easy but the most important thing to me is I was honest with myself and honest to the people I cared about.
I think telling my parents was a big mistake but it has pushed me to write an autobiography about myself and my crossdressing that started at a very early age. The funny thing about all of this is I'm disappointed I lost family and friends but so proud of myself and who I am. At the right times as I meet new people I tell them about ( Rachel ) and most people are OK with it . I have the feeling that we ( the crossdressers ) are the luckiest ones of all haven been given two lives in one.
Saphire I loved your post and wish you all the best in the future.
This is a little poem from my autobiography that will work for all cds .
I LOVE RACHEL VERY MUCH
SHE IS A GOOD INFLUENCE
ME
RACHEL JUST WANTS ME TO
BE HAPPY
RACHEL HAS SET ME FREE.
GOD Bless sweet heart love Rachel JenkinsRHP User
7 years ago
Yes please I’ve been waiting for you I thought I was the only sissy slut cross dresser in Bunbury lol
Hit me up we can be cross dressers together even swap dresses and lipstick lol
I wear a cage cause I’m only 2 inches pawg let’s me out one day a week lolRHP User
6 years ago
I try and look as whorish as possible. Should I feel guilty about that?
- Posted from rhpmobile
Boards
Forum help
Something related with that
Going somewhere & want to hook up?
Hasn't that topic been posted before?
RHP's popular dating tool
Where the heck did that topic go?
Discover what RHP is doing offline
RHP member's RL secrets
reply
like
report